Like sands through the hour glass....

~My sister Stephanie and her husband J.J. welcomed a beautiful baby girl into the world Tuesday. What a precious little angel!!! Can't wait to hold her!!!

Emily

7 lbs. 7 oz.

20 inches

~Max had strep throat and ear infections 2 weeks ago. Matthew had strep throat and a horrible hivey rash last week. This week Gracie has ear infections. The Dr. wondered if she might have RSV. He said the cough might just be from the ear infections but if it didn't improve by yesterday we needed to have her checked out for RSV at the hospital. She sounds tons better so we are thinking it was just from the ear infections thankfully! I am proud of myself for remembering all their doses of medicine so far. Usually I forget once in a while. I am tired of having to stay at home so much to keep from infecting people. I want to hold little Emily!!!! :(  
~Isn't it unreal the amount of mucus a person can produce. I can wipe a nose non-stop, suck it out a zillion times and I still end up with snot all over my shirt when I have a sick baby.  Human Kleenex...GROSSE!!!
~When I walked into WalMart the other day I was so happy! NEW CARTS!!! I even said YESSSS!!!!  It's official...I need more excitement in my life!!!
~My whole life I wanted to be a kindergarten teacher. Then I actually went on a field trip with a kindergarten class to the zoo and a museum at BYU and I decided I could never be a kindergarten teacher. I just didn't have enough energy for it! I was 19 YEARS OLD! The older I get the more I realize there is absolutely no way I could do that for many, many reasons! Here are just a few reasons why...
*being confined to the same room for hours on end with 20+ kids day after day, week after week, for 9 months a year would drive me insane!!!
*not a fan of wiping other people's kids' noses.
*some kids are really obnoxious!
*not a fan of bodily functions. One day Zack brought his back pack home from kindergarten covered in another kids' vomit because he lost his lunch all over the coats and backpacks as they were getting them to leave for the day. Bye, bye backpack! Not enough soap and hot water in the WORLD!!!
*I could go on and on but you get the idea.

I went back to school when Zack was 3 and Matty was 3 months old. I was just taking generals and trying to figure out what I wanted to do as a career. I fell in love with writing when I took my first English class. I used to love to write stories and poetry when I was younger but I had forgotten about that over the years. I absolutely hated English classes in high school and college the first go around! I also HATED history classes back then but thoroughly enjoyed my history class the second go around too. Well, I decided on Journalism as my major. My dream became to write articles for magazines and newspapers and to eventually write childen's books. I stopped going to school when I got pregnant with Max. I've wanted to write since then but I used my blog as my creative outlet. Well, I finally wrote an article for a magazine this week and I am going to submit it and hope it gets published. I am excited and nervous! Wish me luck on this little endeavor! 
~Zack got 2nd over all in the Pinewood Derby Thursday night. He designed his car, painted and decorated his car, and was so excited for the big day! Last year was his first year and while his car was very cool looking it also was very, very slow. We didn't know anything about weights and graphite and all that jazz. Well, Brian and Zack observed others and studied up on it on the internet a bit and this year his car was AWESOME!!! He won 3 heats and was 2nd in one heat so he was 2nd over all out of 15 cars. He was so excited! So were Brian, Max, and Matty! I stayed home with our sick little Gracie so I missed all the excitement but I got a full and very energetic report from my guys when they got home from the derby that night. If anyone ever needs any tips about the cars Brian would be glad to share what he's learned!  :)  I was so happy for my Zacky!
~Baseball tryouts were last night. I'm trying to get myself geared up for the season. It requires MUCH energy on my part! :0  Lots of running to practices and games and chasing after kids and lots of pizza, hot dogs, and sandwiches for dinner since the games are right at dinner time and you have to make something quick for everyone when we get home at like 6:30 or 7. YUCK!!! It's a whirlwind of sunscreen and stain stick. Man...who came up with white pants for baseball players. I.mean.really! It must have been a man!!! No woman in her right mind would have come up with that! They would have been brown, black, or maybe red-ish brown like Utah dirt! I guess at least they can be bleached! Anyhoo, he LOVES it and that's all that matters...right?! It IS fun to get into the games and cheer the team on and watch the progress of the players and visit with the other parents and be out of the house in the fresh, albeit, often COLD air after a long cooped up winter! It's fun for the whole family to spend the time together. It's nice to know there are still some forms of entertainment that don't involve any sort of electronic devices or tv or movie screens. Matty and Max want to play t-ball, too so that will surely add to the craziness but that just adds to the fun, huh!
P.S. I love getting comments!!!  :)

Count Your Many Blessings...

I'm feeling discouraged and like I'm in a major FUNK so I thought I'd listen to one of my favorite church songs and count my many blessings so here goes...
1. BRIAN: I love him and am so grateful for the hard work he has put into making a better life for our family. I know he is as frustrated right now as I am about not being able to move out of his mom's house. There is NOTHING to rent here!!! I take that back. There are 2 places to rent that are WAY TOO expensive for us to rent but otherwise would be perfect. Perfect location. Perfect size. We would just have to starve to be able to live there. I'm concidering it!!! The other places to rent right now are on either side of a canal that runs fast and full and has railroad tracks running at the end of the back yard. Other than that they are superfantabulous!!! They really are though. That's the hard thing. Tons of property. Nice house. Just don't think I could handle the stress of worrying about one of my children drowning or getting run over by a train every time they go out the door to play.  Anyway I am so happy that Brian has a good job with great benefits and that his job is close by and he doesn't have to wake up so EARLY anymore and I can snuggle him a little if I feel like it before he goes to work. He also gets to come home for lunch everyday so I get to talk to an adult for a whole hour in the middle of the day.  And I like that it only takes him 5-10 minutes to get home every night instead of at least an hour like before.
2. MY WONDERFUL CHILDREN: I am so grateful to have a beautiful daughter and 3 amazing sons to care for each day. Thank goodness for them. They bring so much joy and purpose to our lives. I always think...what did we do without them. Then I remember...we just wished for them..that's what we did without them. Don't you just KNOW that your kids were meant to be yours. My soul rejoices with each new spirit we are blessed with and I just know that my spirit knew them before this life and missed them like crazy and feels more whole once they are here with me.
3. SUNBEAMS (the 3 year old church class I teach): They are so cute! One little girl sang out a great song about Jesus on Sunday so beautifully and with such conviction. She brought tears to my eyes. Sweet little angel. Then there was a boy that came up to me and said,''My dad wipes my bum with toilet paper."   Well, gee, thanks for sharing!!! Cracked me up!
4. 50 DEGREES: Yesterday it was 50 degrees!! LOVED it! The kids rode their bikes and played outside. They are so sick of the snow they can't stand it so they have loved having grass to play on again.
5. FOOD: I LOVE food!!! I love the textures, the colors, the smells, the flavors. I LOVE FOOD!!! I am not a big baker. Yeast hates me! My main food joy comes in creating meals. I enjoy the whole process. I enjoy making a menu. I learned this from my sister in law, Stephanie. She is AWESOME!!! I try my best to make a 2 week menu so that I don't have to worry about not having enough money at the end of the pay period for food. I hate going to the store. I don't mind it if I go on Saturday morning alone before everyone else wakes up and I can just browse and enjoy the experience. When I have to take the kids, which I do 99% of the time, I want to pull my hair out the entire time and feel like a crazy person!!! I really enjoy cooking delicious meals. Most of the recipes I have are so delicious I'd rather eat at home than out most days. The only reason for eating out in my opinion is so that someone else has to clean up the mess that night instead of me! I used to be the worst cook ever but have improved enough that I really enjoy the process and the end result. I am also ADDICTED to the Food Network!!!!! LOVE IT!!
6. EXTENDED FAMILIES: I am so grateful for our extended families. I love them and enjoy them so much! I hope that they all know that! I am grateful that Ruth lets us live here even though we are all driving each other crazy and want our own space we appreciate that she allows us to stay with her. Please pray for us to find a place to live before you catch us on an episode of SNAPPED!!!!
7. HEAVENLY FATHER: I love Him so much! I know He loves me! I know that I can not find any joy in this life as fulfilling and comforting as knowing that He loves me! There was a time I wondered if He did love me at all. I had experienced about 5 years of infertility at that point and wanted nothing more than to be a mother. I had had 2 miscarriages. At that point I was sad to lose those babies but so happy to know that I could actually GET pregnant! Well, I had been trying really hard to improve myself spiritually and was stronger than I've ever been spiritually I would say. Well, I got pregnant. I thought it was THE answer to my prayer. It was a reward for doing right. In our mortal life that's how it works so it's hard not to think like that. We do what we are supposed to do and then we are rewarded for it whether through a degree earned, recognition, a job, a promotion. We don't get punished unless we do something bad. That isn't how it works with Heavenly Father. We are ALL on this earth to be tried and tested. We ALL have to go through this process! Being more valiant doesn't make it so we don't have trials. Being valiant helps us to handle our trials better. To find strength when we need it most because we are inviting that strength to our lives. Well, I was THRILLED as you might imagine when I found out I was pregnant. I just KNEW it was going to work this time because Heavenly Father was rewarding me. You also might imagine how DEVASTATED I was when I lost that baby, too, at 10 weeks. I felt like Heavenly Father was mean. That He knew that I trusted Him and had faith that He could have made it work if He had wanted to...if He LOVED me. It was the most testimony shaking experience I had ever had! I was ANGRY, HURT, DISAPPOINTED, SAD, truly DEVASTATED and ALONE!!!! I think Brian thought I was going to be struck by lightning for feeling the way I did. I finally humbled myself to ask for a blessing from Brian and things were said in it that answered questions and thoughts I had not expressed to anyone. I knew from things that were said that Heavenly Father loves me. He wants me to be happy. He wasn't punishing me. It was as if His loving arms were wrapped around me and He said it's ok, I love you, I'm here for you, you have to go through this and I will help you through it. I will not leave you alone. I often think of Him now more as a parent than I did before. I can't imagine the pain He experienced during our Saviour's atonement. I think of a loving parent watching their child go through the pain of stitches, or a shot, or a broken arm, or much, much worse, and knowing that you would take it away from them if you could. That it kills you to know they are suffering. That you hold them and say it's ok, I'm here for you, I won't leave you alone, I'll help you through it. I think also about those times when it's too much to handle and you have to leave the room. You can't watch. You can't hear their crys. I wonder how Heavenly Father endured the atonement of His Beloved Son?! I am thankful for their love for us and their willingness to provide the way for us to return to live with them again! I am thankful for the testimony I gained through that difficult experience and I am thankful for His forgiveness of my questioning His love for me! I cherish this experience and gained a strength and testimony and love for my Heavenly Father that I never knew before and, knowing me, I would never have gained in another way. I am grateful for His love!!!!
8. JESUS CHRIST: I am thankful to know that Jesus Christ is a real person. That he loved you and me and everyone enough to suffer for our sins. Not only our sins but our pain. Our depression. Our disappointment. He suffered that experience I talked about in #7 so that He could be there to help me through it. So that He could help me not to feel alone. So that He could explain my heart to Heavenly Father so I could be forgiven and helped and loved. I am so thankful to know someone loves me THAT much! HE loves me THAT much! To suffer, to die, to be resurrected. To live again. Forever. So that I can live again. Forever. With Him and with my Father in Heaven, and with my family who I love so very much.
9. THE HOLY GHOST: During the years of infertility and miscarriage and monthly disappointment and sadness I learned a very important lesson that helped me so much. The Holy Ghost is there to comfort us. I asked often to feel the comfort of the Holy Ghost to help me get past the disappointment, frustration,  and sadness. He was always there for me. I am so grateful for Him as well. The Godhead. What a blessing! I know that we can receive NO greater blessing in this life!!!

The poor guy has no "skills"

Poor Zacky...he's just too GOOD! His little brother Max has an ear infection and strep throat so he decided to take advantage of the situation that was placed before him and fake sick so he could stay home from school today. This is how the conversation went...

Zack: Mom, did Max tell you how he felt the first day he was sick?
Me: Yes, he said his head hurt and his throat hurt but he only had a very low grade fever.
Zack: Well, I have a lot of gas and I keep burping for no reason.
Me: Yeah, that happens sometimes. You need to hurry and get ready for school now!

Poor guy! He just can't fib. I'm so glad! But I feel kind of bad for him. I used to be a PRO at faking sick! Brian was too. He didn't get his lack of "skills" from us! My brother Nathan beats all I've ever seen though! He admitted to all of us last year that he used to fake sick so much that my mom even took him in to have stomach tests. You know, the kind where you have to fast and drink that yucky, chalky stuff and everything! I remember when they took him in for the tests and my parents were worried about him and the conclusion the dr.s came to was that he had a nervous stomach and possibly an ulcer. Too funny!!! We all thought he had a serious problem until last year! I wonder if Zack will ever figure it out? Part of me hopes he doesn't and part of me hopes he does. Is that bad? I mean, as a parent I LOVE that he doesn't skip school yet and miss important learning opportunities. Not to mention the fact that Matthew refuses to ride the  bus to school when Zack isn't riding it too and Brian or I have to drive him to school. Then I HAVE to make sure I meet him at the bus after school or he totally flips out!!! But part of me knows that that's a part of a kids life. Skipping out on school once in a while and just vegging out on the couch and enjoying a little more attention from your mom. He's only 9, I'm sure eventually he'll meet some good little slacker friend that will show him the light. :) For now I'll just appreciate what I've got til it's gone!!!

I'm proud to be an American watching the Olympics!!!!

I've been really enjoying the olympics this year. I always do! I have to say that I am so proud to be an American!!! I always am! But as I watch our olympic athletes compete I am even more proud to be an American!!! I have watched some of the athletes from other countries try to cheat their way to gold. Pushing and shoving and tripping other people down purposely so they could win. The Russian ice skater dude that won silver in the individual men's competition was completely out of control!!! What a poor sport! He even went as far as to say that he was having a platinum medal made for himself because he feels like the gold was stolen from him by an American. Whatever dude!! Then as I watched the women's ice skating competition they were saying that some of the women competing have so much pressure placed on them from their home countries that if they don't win gold they will have hateful emails and letters even if they get a different medal. They have said this during many competitions I've watched, that many of these athletes will basically be shunned when they return from the olympics if they don't earn gold. I can't imagine being a teenager and having that much pressure placed on me. It makes me proud to be an American. We love our athletes no matter what! They play clean! They work hard! They are wonderful at what they do! It's been fun watching them!

Amazing!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmm-0-Rdxo8&feature=related

For just one day....

Things I wish I would have appreciated more when I was a kid:
-Lazy days-What is a lazy day...I can't remember! Too much to do with 4 kids.
-The ability to read a book without interruptions-I can't even get a page in without 14 interruptions! Not even a magazine!
-Being able to eat anything and everything in sight and NEVER putting on a pound!!!-I was SO tall and skinny and I ate like a horse! Course, I rode my bike constantly, ran everywhere instead of walking, played outside ALL OF THE TIME, lived across the street from an elementary school so we just ran and played basketball, football, baseball, anything and everything all day long.
-Food, clothing, housing, transportation, fun- Yep! It was all just provided! I didn't even think about how or why or anything, just completely took for granted that when I opened my drawer, clothes would be there. When I was hungry there was food to eat. We had a roof over our heads and cars to drive and everything we needed. It just HAPPENED...magically!!!
-Some days I wish I could go back to those days just so I could appreciate it a little more! It's been one of those kind of scary grown up days where it isn't all secure and perfect and I have that grown up pit in the middle of my stomach. Not my favorite kind of days. So, I'm just wishing for one of those carefree, secure, blissful days of youth.........that's not too much to ask...is it???...just for one day......

Um...WHAT DID THEY JUST SAY?!?!

So I'm minding my own business, folding clothes and half watching The Today Show this morning when they mention that it has been 22 years since a man won an olympic gold medal for ice skating when Brian Boitano won it in 1988. Hold up... wait....WHAT DID THEY JUST SAY?!?!......22 years ago?!?! That CAN'T be right!! They MUST be wrong!!! I was 15 years old...22 years ago????  I LOVE the olympics!!! I remember watching him win that medal!!! I...AM...OLD!!!! VERY...VERY...OLD!!! How did this happen?

Better Choices Diary: Entry#1

I made stew for dinner. It was loaded with tons of delicious veggies, lean ground beef, V8 juice, beef boullion. It was yummy! I had a few saltines with butter on them. I HAVE to have them! I have eaten them with stew my WHOLE life!!! I did limit it to only a few though. Baby steps.....

Note to self....

Please avoid the following foods if you ever expect to lose weight and to continue fitting through doors:

Cheetos
Chili Cheese Fritos
Doritos
Cheddar Jack flavored Cheez-Its
Cheesecake
Brownies
Bacon
Sausage
CANDY
Pizza Hut Pizza
Fried Chicken
Greasy Cheeseburgers
7 layer dip
Velveeta and rotel queso dip and chips
French onion dip and chips
Cadbury eggs

Yes, sadly I have eaten all of these things in the last week.  I'm out of control! What is up with that?!?! I've lost 11 lbs. since we've moved and I'm scared to get on the scale after this last week. I probably put it all back on in a week! Several months back I decided I was going to get serious about this weight loss thing. HA!! I was going to start posting my daily efforts to be better. I wasn't going on a diet (I refuse!) I was just going to make some wiser choices. Try changing bad habits. Have you seen any posts about my progress? I didn't think so!! What is WRONG with me?! I want to be healthy and I want to feel more energetic and more comfortable taking my children places, like the pool, for instance. I've GOT to get a grip!!! I feel like I'm one step away from shopping around for a 'fashionable' Jazzy!! Ok I'm going to do it. From this point on today I am going to be better. I'm going to forget about the frozen waffle I had for breakfast that was slathered in butter and syrup. I will look past the Cheddar Jack flavored Cheez Its I just ate. I am going to put my best foot forward and do something! Look for my "Better Choices Diary". I WILL BE ACCOUNTABLE!!!!  
FYI: This list is not typical. We had Super Bowl Sunday and Valentine's Day and a 4 day weekend mixed in there. It was more of a week and a half but whatever.  :)

I am SO glad I was finally brave!

"Mother Bear" update:
(If you don't know what this is about check out the post I made on October 17th entitled, "Mother Bear".)

In DECEMBER I finally got brave enough to write an email/letter to the school district's "nutritionist" (I use this term lightly seeing as how the "nutritionist" for our school district is actually an office manager/accountant that took over the nutritionist's job when she retired. She does a decent job, I suppose, but isn't that CRAZY!!!).  I was
SO nervous about doing this! As a mother of a child with food allergies I have learned that a lot of people think it is a HUGE burdon for them to have to "deal" with his needs and I just try to take on the responsibility as much as I can alone without causing a problem for anyone. I had taken all those steps to protect Matty I thought, yet he was still in danger. Well, she called me right away and said that BY LAW they HAD to provide a peanut-free table for him. There are a lot of things I didn't know that were putting him in danger and I thought he was as protected as possible. I had taken a bottle of Benedryl and an EpiPen to the school for him and after talking with the school nurse I learned that the school couldn't even LEGALLY use the medication I provided him with because it was an over the counter bottle of Benedryl and they needed a prescription so it had Dr.'s orders and dosage information specific to Matthew. The epi pen was just there it wasn't in the box which had Dr.'s orders on it. The nurse made me feel like an unfit mother and a total moron every time I talked with her because I didn't know everything she knew that I was supposed to do.  I finally said,"Look, I had NO way of knowing these things unless someone told me and how on earth am I supposed to just PULL this stuff out unless someone tells me what I am supposed to do?!" Anyhoo, we had a meeting Wednesday that is called a 504. The people that were there: Me, the nurse (by the way her office is at the Health Department because she is the nurse for the ENTIRE district, not just for the school. Yeah, that's right, NO NURSE in the school!!! SCARY!!!), the principal, Matthew's teacher, the district "nutritionist", a representative from the superintendant's office, the cafeteria supervisor for Matthew's school, and a lady that was kind of the mediator for the meeting. I was SO nervous on the days leading up to this meeting! I prayed and fretted. The meeting went FANTASTICALLY well!!! As of Wednesday...NO MORE PEANUT BUTTER AND HONEY CUPS!!!! Matthew can eat a warm lunch like everyone else on the days they make rolls now!!! HOORAY!!! They typically have mac-n-cheese or potatoes and gravy on the days they have peanut butter and honey cups to go with the rolls. They will provide hiim with a peanut-free table!! I expressed my concerns over parents not knowing what steps need to be taken to protect their children. One KEY piece of information was unaware of is that the nurse is to be notified THE DAY a child with a medical condition such as food allergies is enrolled so that they can properly train the child's teacher on how to treat that child's condition if an emergency should arise and how to administer an epi pen as would be necessary in MY SON'S case!!! Guess when the nurse was notified of Matthew's allergy?....In DECEMBER the day the nutritionist received my email. This means my son attended that school for 3 MONTHS before the nurse was notified and the teacher trained. She still would not know to this day if I hadn't written the letter. SCARY!!! The receptionist DROPPED THE BALL!!! The school failed us and now there are still children in the school who have the same problem and they don't even know it!!! UNACCEPTABLE!!!! At the meeting it was decided that a note needs to be sent out to ALL parents saying that if they have a child with medical conditions such as food allergies they need to talk with the school and it will have a list of all steps that need to be taken to protect their children since they were improperly oriented at registration. They actually decided that this note would be sent out DISTRICT wide!!! There is also going to be a packet of information and a list of necessary steps to be taken given to each parent of a child with a medical condition at the time of registration so they can monitor the schools responsibilities and take care of their own. We went over what steps would be taken on field trips, on the school bus he rides daily. They will provide Matthew's class with a little instructional class thing that will explain to the children what it means to be "allergic to peanuts" so they can more fully understand and help him out instead of trying to hurt him like the one student did with the peanut butter cup. I didn't even know that was an option until the mediator told me it was. I offered to be an advocate for parents and students with medical conditions and food allergies to help them through the process since it has been a LONG, drawn out, difficult process for us and it SHOULDN'T be!!! It should be simple and precise and easy to make sure your child is safe at school. I feel so much better to think that things are headed in the right direction. When I told Matthew the changes he said,"YESSS!!! I can eat macaroni and cheese and potatoes and gravy now!!!"  When I told his big brother, Zack who's in 4th grade. He said with big crocodile tears in his eyes,"Thanks mom. Those peanut butter cups scared me so much for Matthew." I am so glad I didn't chicken out like I almost did! It took me 2 months to get up the nerve to write my letter. I only wish I had written it immediately. I thought the only problem was the peanut butter cups, I had NO IDEA all of the ways my son was in danger or I would have done something sooner!!!  I just needed a little time to be brave! Like I told the people in the meeting: After watching my 2 year old baby son nearly die in my arms after eating a pistachio I will do everything I can to make sure it doesn't happen again!!!

Baptism, Ikea, queso, and 50...what more could a girl ask for!!!

Our nephew was baptized yesterday about 2 hours 45 minutes from where we live. It was a beautiful day! We were happy that we could afford to make it there. It was wonderful to share in Clay's day. Clay's parents divorced a couple years ago. Since then they have each remarried. His dad, Jared is Brian's brother. Jared's new wife is WONDERFUL!!! I have known Jared for 17 years and I have NEVER seen him so happy in all that time! It's been such a great thing to see how happy he and Becky are together. We were all more than a little nervous to go to the baptism because there would be 4 extended families gathered and there are still some...shall we say... harsh feelings there. As we sat in the Relief Society room waiting for the baptism to start I thought WOW this is uncomfortable! The thought came to mind that if people could remember that feeling if thinking of being unfaithful then maybe they would think twice about it. I'm just sayin! Think of your poor innocent extended families who have to be subjected to such experiences for the rest of our lives. And the friends! Hello!!!! SHEESH!!! The ex-wife had the brunch afterwards at her new home. The thought of that was uncomfortable but all in all it was a great day. Everyone acted like civilized grown ups and I think it went much better than any of us could have imagined. I am so glad that Clay chose to be baptized. I am so glad that after all Jared has been through that he and Becky found each other and have brought so much joy to each others lives. He found someone who loves him for him and is good to him and it's refreshing I must say! She has also brought a fun, bright light to the family and we all just love her!
~It was 50 degrees up there yesterday! That was awesome! We didn't even wear jackets! It felt WARM to us compared to the freezing temps we've had this winter. I couldn't get over how things have changed this winter. Usually there is snow up there and then when you drive into our town there isn't any snow or there's very little. This year it's the opposite. We have tons of snow and they didn't have much. We have had 3 or 4 foot piles of snow all up and down the sides of the streets and down the middle of some streets here for weeks as they just keep plowing it. I've never seen anything like it in our town before. The kids LOVED it for a long time! Now they are ready to ride their bikes and want it to all just melt away.
~I got to go to Ikea! I just LOVE Ikea!!! Some people don't appreciate the JOY Ikea has to offer. I know it can feel overwhelming because of the enormity of the building but don't let it scare you. I've been there enough now that I know to just skip the upstairs floor unless you are buying furniture, cabinets, or you just need some ideas. It's just the display area. I do go upstairs to the kids department and sometimes we eat up there. 99 cent kids meals!!! And they have really good chicken strips! Then we head right back downstairs. We browse through all the fun departments down there and I usually find some great little tokens along the way. I just LOVE Ikea!!! Thanks to Brian and the boys for being such great sports and not even complaining very much! Gracie was totally happy like me!
~I can't wait for the Super Bowl! I don't know what teams are actually playing in the Super Bowl this year but we are going to eat some sandwiches, have 7 layer dip, french onion dip, and queso dip made with the big block of velveeta and two cans of rotel tomatoes. I CAN'T WAIT!!! Pop and brownies to finish things off. It's going to be a great splurging day! Love those days! AND I always get a kick out of the commercials! They are the best part after all!
~After I made this post I read my cousin John's blog and he had this link that is so neat! It's about LDS members affected by the quake. He served his mission in Haiti for 4 months in the early 90's before being sent to Florida once the conditions in Haiti became too dangerous for the missioaries to stay there. Just thought I'd share the link. It is very touching! The people's testimonies and strength are very inspiring!  http://www.meridianmagazine.com/churchupdate/100202church.html

http://www.tarasyummyrecipes.blogspot.com/

Wanted: Substitute mom for a day......

For just one day!!! It's going to be such a hectic, crazy, busy day and I woke up on the wrong side of the bed so it's going to be a bumpy ride.................

Scary.....

Last night I was sitting on our bed, Brian was sitting in our rocker recliner, and Gracie was crawling around on the bedroom floor playing with toys. I looked up to check on her at one point and she was looking at me with her big brown eyes with her head cocked funny and with it wedged under the front left corner of the rocker. Panic coursed through every vein and I told Brian not to move and ran to Gracie. After pulling her out from under the rocker I held her tightly to me and kissed her sweet face and shook as I considered the damage that could have been done to my beautiful daughter if her 200 plus pound father would have rocked forward onto her little head. I have been completely freaked out ever since! I woke up at 3:30 and after a few minutes that picture of her head under the rocking chair and her big brown eyes looking at me popped into my head and I can't get it out of my mind. It literallyl leaves me sick to my stomach!!! I pray every morning that our children will be protected from harm and serious accident since they are generally CRAZY and I worry all the time about them hurting themselves or each other. Sometimes that prayer gets to be routine but yesterday morning I just really had an uneasy feeling and prayed sincerely for each of them. I am so grateful that prayer was answered!!! If I hadn't been in the room or hadn't looked up just then who knows what would have happened. I am just so grateful for her health and that everything is ok but now my mind is running over the "what ifs". What if I'm not around if she does that again. What if one of the kids is sitting in the rocking chair if that happens again. What if...what if...what if?! Why do minds do things like that at 3:30 A.M. when you don't have anything else to distract your brain. Anyway, I know that sometimes things...just happen. That is the scariest part of parenthood for me. Knowing that some things either...just happen or things happen for a reason that we don't want to happen and we don't understand the reason and it's not what WE want and there isn't anything we can do about it. We just pray and hope that things work out and hope that if they don't work out like we hope that we'll have the strength to endure that challenge. Now I just hope my mind will shut off after I shut off this computer and will let me catch some much needed sleep...wish me luck!!!

This and that...

~FYI: Apparently there is a limit on how long you should leave rechargeable camera batteries on the charger. We didn't discover this by reading the directions. No that would be much too easy! We discovered this by leaving the batteries on the charger too long and the acid started oozing out of them. Apparently overnight is TOO long!!! OOPS!!
~Today I wanted to smack a chick! She was walking down the street with her son in a stroller. He had a coat on. But NO SOCKS!!! It was like 25 degrees today! He was 18 months to a year old I'm guessing. Think how freezing cold your feet get in the morning. Inside your house. Now imagine being outside for who knows how long without socks on your feet in 25 degree weather. I can't imagine what was going through this chicks head! One time I saw a woman with a baby with a onesie and that's it in the dead of winter. Of course the mom had on a coat and warm shoes and long pants. I just can't figure out what the heck people are thinking. At least figure if you are wearing 3 layers of clothing your baby needs 3 layers of clothing too! It's winter....put socks on your baby!!!!! Geez Louise!!!!
~I am so glad Brian doesn't work for an accounting firm this year. NO MORE BUSY SEASON this year!!! I LOVE that!! We actually get to see him! AWESOME!!!
~Have you seen the movie Up? It is the cutest show! We laugh every time we watch it! I usually don't watch the kids shows with them anymore but I do watch this one with them. Enjoyable for adults as well as kids. It's my new favorite!
~Did you ever notice how Sunbeams (the sunday school class I teach at church with 3 and 4 year olds) have absolutely NO BOUNDARIES!!! We had a little girl in our class today that we hadn't had in class before. I knew her for all of 20 minutes before she started leaning on me and pulling my skirt up on the side of my leg repeatedly and basically MAULING me! I wouldn't have minded that much except that she sucks her thumb too. She has slobber stringing from her thumb every time she takes her thumb out of her mouth. Then she touches Gracie's toy. I'm not sure this germaphobe can handle Sunbeams with a baby!!! They are awfully cute and I like the calling most of the time but I'm just not very good with bodily functions and secretions!!!
~Some people are just so dang good at what they do that you just can't get over how good they are! The song leader in primary in our ward is OUTSTANDING!!! The kids love her and she does and excellent job and I am in awe of her each week. One of my most favorite parts of a primary calling is that I get to hear and sing the primary songs. They are so wonderful and nothing is sweeter than the voices of the little primary children singing the beautiful primary songs. I just love it!

Stick a fork in us...we are DEFINITELY done!!!! (we think!!!)

We think we've finally decided that we are DEFINITELY done having babies. We've been deciding this for quite some time now. It's been quite difficult for me to finally, officially make the decision that we're DONE. When we decided to have children it was really a no brainer. We loved each other and wanted to have kiddos and I was having problems that the dr. said would cause me to have difficulty getting pregnant so we just decided 6 months into our marriage that we'd leave it up to the Lord and when he saw fit to bless us with a child we'd be super happy!!! 6 years, 3 miscarriages, trillions of tears, many blessings and prayers later...our little Zackary was born. I will never forget the joy I felt as I held him in my arms in the hospital room when they brought him to me after they cleaned him up and Brian had gone home for some zzzzs after a very looooonnnggg day and night. It was just me and him. He was kind of funny looking with his cone shaped head but he was mine and of course I thought he was the most beautiful baby EVER!!! I remember counting his fingers and toes and praying and thanking my Heavenly Father for sending this precious baby to me. It was a beautiful moment I will always cherish. Each of our children have been such a blessing to us. I didn't expect to have my first baby at the age of 27, #2 at 30, #3 at 33, and my 4th at 36. The older I am the HARDER the pregnancy. My first and second pregnanies were great! Especially the second. The delivery and recovery were even great for me physically. Emotionally it was the hardest since Matty had to be resussitated when he finally was out of me and that scared us to death! He was the dreamiest baby and I think part of it was that I was so much more relaxed with him. I had done this before and Zack was still alive so I must not be too bad at this. I could do it again. Well, my pregnancy with Max was a little more difficult. I was EXHAUSTED beyond anything I had ever felt before! I was also older and I could tell! I felt more queezy too and just not so hot. I was POSITIVE he was a girl because my pregnancy was so much different than it had been before and I actually felt worse than I had before. I never felt 100% with my pregnancies but I never was very sick at all. Never threw up except the occasional gag from my tooth brush. With him I felt a little rougher. I thought each of my boys was kind of difficult to keep up with until I had Max. Well, I still can't decide if it was just Max or the combination of Max and Matthew. There came a time when I felt strongly I should just stop preventing pregnancy again and leave it up to the Lord again but I was TERRIFIED because I didn't know how I would ever handle another baby since the destruction and craziness of Max and Matthew were about to kill me off. After a while I was sad that we hadn't had a baby yet and then we went somewhere I can't remember where. We didn't need a stroller or a diaper bag. The kids were at great ages. I decided maybe I didn't want to have another baby after all so I took all the clothes and garb to D.I. and figured we would make things permanent and we could move on with our lives and it was going to be great! The next month I found out I was pregant with Gracie. First, I was SCARED to death!!! Then, I was sick as a dog. I lived the next 4 months in a constant state of nausea. I felt like I was car sick and had a stomach virus. You know the feeling where if you just hold still enough you don't feel like you are going to lose your lunch but any movement makes you feel like you are just going to lose it! Well,the only problem with that was I had 3 other children to take care of and that was pretty rough. I am such a wimp. I kept thinking of women I know like Tara, Cassie, Anna, and Heidi who get so incredibly sick it isn't even funny. I had been so blessed with my previous pregnancies. I just KNEW this time it was a girl because I had truly NEVER felt like this and people said that was usually a sign that it was the opposite sex of what you already had. Surprisingly I only threw up 5 times the whole time but I WISHED I could throw up and feel better the rest of the time. Packing the kids in the car to take Zack to school and pick him up and to take Matty to preschool and pick him up and grocery shopping and every other thing that required a drive in the car felt like a nightmare! Carsick on top of carsick was NOT fun! Doing dishes or any household task became increasingly difficult. I only bathed the kids when I couldn't remember how long it had been since they had had a bath. I know...terrible!!! It was a horrible 4 months!!! Then once I felt better I experienced so many ups and downs wondering if I could REALLY do this again! And with a GIRL!!! I didn't know anything about girls. Well, sure, I was one but I'd been the mom of boys for 9 years and knew NOTHING about girls anymore! The maternity books call it "misgivings". I call it SCARED TO DEATH!!!! The MOMENT they handed me my sweet little Gracie Sue all of the worries and fears and "misgivings" went away. I could do it! She was the sweetest baby! She has adored me from day one and I have adored her right back along with each member of our family! She is a total mama's girl. She's turning into quite the little daddy's girl, too! The minute she hears his voice when he comes home for lunch and after work she crawls to where ever he is as fast as she can. She flirts with him and smiles the sweetest smile at him. One day she had a dress on and got stuck and just sat there staring at him making this funny noise to get his attention until he came and picked her up and then she just SMILED at him! She LOVES him so much! Of course she has him wrapped around her little finger! He's always been such a wonderful father and has always loved his kids so much. They have all thought he was the greatest! It has been such a beautiful thing to watch! Our whole little family is absolutely SMITTEN with Gracie and we can't imagine life without her! Heavenly Father knew we needed her! She brings us so much joy and I just can't tell you how grateful I am that she is a part of our family. By the end of the pregnancy I was POSITIVE we were done making people. This factory was shutting down! I NEVER wanted to feel like that again! I was having such a hard time breathing and I had several panic attacks because I couldn't breathe. I also started feeling sick again during the last month. I told Brian I wanted him to do something permanent because I NEVER wanted to feel that way again and I NEVER wanted to FORGET how horrible I felt and do it again!!! Well, Gracie has been such a wonderful baby that I just kind of forget sometimes and think about how wonderful it would be to bring another precious child into the world. The hard part is that EVERYONE in the family suffers when mom can't function fully for 4 months straight. Things slip and we are STILL trying to get back to normal. Gracie has been a wonderful baby...as long as I am holding her CONSTANTLY since the day she was born!!! But if I'm holding her I don't have to be doing anything special like bouncing, playing, walking...just holding. I have had to cook many meals while holding her. I've loaded and unloaded the dishwasher many times while holding her. She eats well. She sleeps well. She is super easy to keep happy. All she needs is ME!!! As wonderful as that is it hinders my ability to keep up with my duties as a mother and housewife. It takes a lot out of everyone to have another baby. But all that said. Are we done?! It sounds like it would be the easiest decision to come to EVER! But it isn't! Are there any other babies in Heaven that are meant to be part of our family forever. It's a big decision to make! It's one of the most important decisions we'll ever make. We need to KNOW! You know! If we KNOW then we can officially decide and proceed in whatever direction that decision takes us. We need to earnestly pray about it, I know! But I'm afraid of the answer! I'm afraid of EITHER answer!!! I don't think I want to do this whole thing again but I also don't know if I'm ready for this part of my life to be finished. I LOVE my kids so much! I love each of their personalities and I love the beautiful parts of the whole process of bringing new lives into the world. If I could GUARANTEE that the pregnancy would be just like my pregnancy with Matthew minus the scary parts, of course, then I would do it 10 more times. Unfortunately there are NO guarantees! Once you KNOW do you ever have regrets about the decision? If you have had this experience where you KNEW that you were done and you stopped please tell me your feelings about it. Maybe it will help me out! I'm afraid we'll make a permanent decision and later regret it! UGGHH!!

My "powers are weak"....

~My kids built the sweetest snowman the other day. It was their dad and he was holding a baby snowman that was Gracie. How cute are they?!
~For some reason the boys have started using a shovel somehow when they build the snowmen and now it's buried in new snow. OOOOPS!!!
~Our primary class went really well Sunday. They are ADORABLE kids!!! Max gave his talk. Well, he stood there while I gave the talk. It was only his second time to go to big kid primary and he got stage fright. No tears just...speechless. Matthew volunteered in his class to give a talk this week. We're trying to be SO PROUD of his desire to give talks in primary. The topic is "We believe in God the Eternal Father and in His Son Jesus Christ." Not too difficult at least. I was proud of Matthew for volunteering to recite the first article of faith in primary last Sunday. He did a great job! He's pretty shy so I was surprised he did it!!! He's very brave!
~My "powers are weak"!! I decided to shovel Ruth's driveway yesterday. I could use the exercise and her super nice neighbor who usually plows it with is 4-wheeler didn't come over and plow so I just figured what the heck might as well. I only lasted an hour and only shoveled like a quarter of it. It totally kicked my trash!! I'm so sore today! The neighbor came by this morning thankfully since it snowed at least the same amount last night as the night before. Can't get over how much snow we have!! My biggest problem is that it started kind of melting on the bottom but there were still several inches on top of that so I was shoveling slush and snow. HEAVY STUFF!!! I am pathetically out of shape!!!
~I have almost finished another book. It's only taken me weeks of reading a sentence here a paragraph there. I haven't been sleeping well so I have been reading at night when I can't fall asleep and in the morning when I wake up at 4am and can't fall back to sleep and finally give in and read. I only have like 30 pages left. I LOVE reading! I am so glad my mom shares her books with me. She gives me the books in perfect shape. You can't even tell they have been read. Then I return them with covers and pages bent. I even spilled a little water on this one. I feel just terrible returning them in such shape but she never complains and is so nice about it. I appreciate it so much! After carrying a book around for weeks it starts to show wear. Especially when I have a super cute little 3 year old running around destroying everything in his path. Anyway, I have really enjoyed this book. It's set in the 1870's and it makes me so grateful for blessings, conveniences, medicine, emergency services, lots of things we take for granted every day! I am spoiled and so grateful for that! So glad I can throw a load of clothes in the washing machine and then in the dryer, load and unload the dishwasher, turn on a light when I need it. DRIVE to the store if I need a loaf of bread, jam, fruit, vegetables, milk, butter, etc., etc. I can buy my family socks instead of knitting them myself. Use the very convenient freezer, frig, toilet, shower, furnace, air conditioner, school bus system. On and on I could go!

I quit!?!?

Last night I was thinking of quitting my job. Today is a new day thank goodness! I think I'll keep the job!!! It's snowing too! It's so beautiful to watch! I love waking up to see a blanket of snow covering everything! I'm just going to be happy and ENJOY the kids and the "job" I have. Soon enough I'll be "unemployed" ...and then I'll wish for this time back. Gotta take the time to ENJOY it while it lasts!!!!

Love it!!!!

I am a HUGE fan of Gilmore Girls!!! I didn't actually discover it until the summer of 2006 (unbeknownst to me at the time they had just had the SERIES finale the month before) when I started watching the reruns while I prepared lunch for the kids and cleaned up the mess. I instantly fell in love with Lorelei and Rory!!! Not to mention...LUKE!!! Hubba Hubba!!! I own the DVD box set of Gilmore Girls and every thing! They are my FAVORITE!!! All I have to do is hear the theme song and I feel happy! I smile, dance, and sing! It's the best!!! Well, I decided to change my ringtone today to something fun and I thought of the theme song to Gilmore Girls. I've had 2 calls since I changed it and it just makes me so happy to hear it! I should have done this a long time ago! I have REALLY needed a pick me up lately and something to try to keep me positive and in a good mood even though things around me aren't always going so well. Music has such a HUGE influence on my moods and I'm hoping this will help a little. If I answer the phone by singing that song instead of saying hello just go with it! I put the song on my play list so turn up the volume and listen to the song and SMILE!!!

My keester survived!!!

~We went ice skating today with Brian's brother Jared and his wife Becky, their kids, Becky's family, and Brian's Mom and brother Chris came along to watch. Well, it was the first time for all of us and it was a lot of fun! I was a HUGE chicken poo and couldn't bring myself to step on the ice with both skates. Finally, Chris let me hold on to his arm (he was in tennis shoes and didn't slip at all) and he we went around the rink once. My knees were killing me! I was so afraid of falling and breaking my tailbone...again!!! Thankfully I made it back to safety! I almost kissed the ground when I stepped off the ice. I changed out of my ice skates, put my shoes back on and let my little Max around the ice. He didn't fare so well! He started running on the ice and slipped and fell and landed on his poor little noggin. He had a bad head ache after that! Poor little guy! Brian did a FANTASTIC job!!! Matty did super well, too. Zack got the hang of it eventually. I was so proud of them for trying and trying over and over!!! Becky brought hot chocolate for everyone. Her friend brought my FAVORITE...SCOTCHEROOS!!! LOVE them!!! And Zacky made some brownies to share. It was a great time! I'll post pictures on my word from the zoo blog soon. Even though I'm a chicken I can officially say I have tried ice skating now and I can mark it off my bucket list.
~I am the WORST at writing in a journal. My blogs have really helped this along I think. I mean at least I have SOME sort of record of our lives and our comings and goings and my feelings on things. Well, another great journal resource is my calendars. I keep our calendars every year. Some people think it's very weird that I do this but it has come in handy many times as a reference for when certain things happened. Also it's kind of fun to look back over the events written on the calendar. The other day I was looking over my 2009 calendar and last year about a week ago we had the ultrasound that told us we were having a precious little girl. It was kind of fun to think back on a year ago. Anyway, I hope you all keep your calendars as well. What better journals of what actually goes on in our lives and some of the fun activities we took part in.
~Tomorrow is the big day...our first day teaching Max's church class. He also gets to give his first ever talk in church. I'm excited and kind of nervous.
~I am so thankful for my children! I love each of them so much and hope they all know that! Some times life gets so crazy and one or the other gets more attention than the others and I worry about how they are handling everything and if they all feel enough love from us.
~Brian took Zack on a date in May to a baseball game. In July he took Matthew on a date to the Rodeo. Max has been REALLY needing attention so Brian decided to take him to see Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 last night for their date. He really had fun and looked forward to it all day. I hope we can be better about doing that this year with the kids. Maybe do it twice with each kid. It's kind of nice because it makes them feel so special and it's not too expensive since it's just 2 people going. The kids LOVE it and that's the whole point of it!
~Well, I hope everyone has a great day and that things are going well for everyone!!!

Cute girl!

~Yesterday my little cute Gracie (7 months old) was sitting on my lap while I was applying my make up and The Today Show was on. When they were panning through the audience that stands outside the studio as they went to commercial apparently Gracie thought they were all smiling and waving at her so she smiled and waved back. So cute!!!
~Today I was standing in the bathroom holding Gracie and letting her look in the mirror. Usually she just looks at the mirror with a confused look on her little face. Today she was smiling when she looked at the mirror and saw the CUTEST little girl on Earth and just couldn't resist smiling back and waving at her reflection. It was the sweetest thing!!!

My b-day. The big 3-7!!! WOW I'm OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~My mom, my sister Stephanie and Steph's son Josh came to town to take me to lunch for my birthday. It was nice to spend time with them! My mom made me a cake and brought it with her and I thought that was very nice of her! It's interesting how most birthdays come and go and I don't even care but this year it seemed more important to me. Meant more to me. I don't know why that is but I sure did appreciate all of the nice gestures by everyone to make the day more special!!!
~I'm kind of wishing I would have asked Brian to take the day off so he could watch the kids for me and make dinner for me and do the laundry and basically give me a break for a day.I always feel like I'm able to give more as a mom and be better and nicer when I have a little time to relax and just BE once in a while. Does that make me selfish or does that make me normal and human?
~Man I can't believe how dry it is here! We are going through Aveeno like crazy and my hands are still cracked and bleeding. My feet are atrocious!!! I stocked up on a good foot cream, foot scrub, and pumice stone the other day. I sure hope it helps!!!
~I've decided we should buy stock in kleenex, cold medicine, ibuprofen, tylenol, hand sanitizer, and lotion before next winter. By Spring we'll be raking in the cash!!!!! We've spent an absolute fortune on these things this year. Not to mention copays for Dr. and dentist visits, prescriptions, hospital visits, and cough drops. Sheesh!!!!
~I'm having an -I really miss my dad- day!!! When I woke up this morning I was thinking about how special my birthdays were when I was a little kid. At my mom's house she would get a baby sitter and take me out to eat and I could pick where ever I wanted to eat. It was just me, Mom, and Stan. She would also make us our favorite cake and we would have ice cream. I don't remember anything about the gifts although there were gifts I just remember the feelings I had of being special and getting to do special things on my special day. She also made cupcakes and took them to school for a treat for me to share with my class that day. When we went to my Dad's for Christmas break he would always have a party for me. My birthday was in the middle of January so we wouldn't see each other on my birthday but he always made a special point to have a party for me while we were together. He would always make a special dinner for me. My most favorite dinner always was and always will be spaghetti. Italian in general really. For a few years in a row he actually made the spaghetti noodles from scratch and the sauce from scratch. I am sure there were presents and a cake involved there too and but once again I can't remember those details just the feelings of being special and having a special day. I told Brian about it when I woke up and thought about it all day. I was able to spend some time time with my mom and sister and that was so nice and then dinner with my family and cake and ice cream. I was missing my dad. He always called and wished me happy birthday and I know that he loved me. He wasn't perfect. None of us are. But he was a person in my life that I knew loved me, and wanted me to be happy. I loved him too and miss him!!!!!
~So Brian gave me the BEST gift for my birthday!!! He knows how addicted I am to facebook and blogging and how hard it's been to not have my own computer since we've lived with his mom and our computer is broken so he bought me one of those tiny little computers. They had them at Walmart for $229.00 so he got me one. I absolutely LOVE it!!! I don't remember when I've had a more perfect gift!!! Now I just need to keep Max away from it and I'll be in great shape!!! Brian also made one of my favorite cakes ever. My mom's strawberry cake. So delicious!!! And it's a "from scratch" recipe and everything. LOVE it! LOVE that he made it for me!!! What a great guy!!!!

My ring....

One of the prongs on my wedding ring bent a couple of weeks ago so I took it into the jewelry store to have it fixed. They said it also needed to have the prongs replaced or redone or something because they were so worn down. I have been without it for over 2 weeks and finally got it back last night. I missed it so much! I've been wearing it for 17 years now (well February it will be the 17th anniversary of our engagement) and it is just kind of...part of me, you know. It's just always there and to not have it made me appreciate it even more once it was back. It looks so BEAUTIFUL again too! It was REALLY, REALLY dirty! Mommyhood is a DIRTY job!!! Anyway, I mostly love the feelings behind which all came flooding back to me of when Brian gave it to me and asked me to be his wife. And when he placed it on my finger at the temple after we were sealed for time and all eternity. To me it is special and lovely and will always be a part of me and a wonderful symbol of our love for each other. I once had a sister in law (she and my brother in law have since divorced) who, after a year of marriage traded her ring in on a new model. Yes! She did this! It still blows my mind! To be completely honest, my ring is much more flashy than anything I would have ever chosen for myself. I would have chosen a plain white or yellow gold band with a single diamond in the middle if I were the one doing the choosing because I'm just more simple and plain I suppose. Well, Brian chose this ring for me and presented it to me with LOVE and I will always cherish it and LOVE it more than any other ring on earth because HE gave it to me and it is our SYMBOL, you know?! Not having it really got me thinking these last couple of weeks about all the ring symblolizes for us. I was almost as happy last night to have it back as I was to get it from him the first time he gave it to me. I seriously got teary. I hope you all take a moment to remember back to the sweet moment your husband asked you to marry him. Think back on those feelings. Think about what the ring symbolizes and the feelings and emotions that were wrapped up in that beautiful moment that was sealed with a kiss and a ring.....

If you can read this you are in my way...

~I found a t-shirt I need to get. It looks like an eye chart and said If you can read this you are in my way. Cracked me up!!! I think my sister Katie would like it too!!! hehehe
~The other night while Brian and I were making dinner Max decided it would be super fun to smear Vaseline all over the rim of the toilet. When I walked in the bathroom after he had gone to bed and saw it my mind was having a hard time processing what my eyes were seeing. Did someone do that vaseline on the toilet prank??? No who would do such a thing??? Zack? NO!!!! Matthew? No.? Max (age 3)? Well, sure!!!!! After all he once painted the garbage can with honey using an actual paint brush. No one else's mind works like this!! So the next morning we asked him about it and he said he didn't do it. It was a ghost boy. He tried to stop him but he wouldn't listen and did it anyway. If he wasn't so stinking cute I just don't know what would have happened to him by now! Santa totally knew what he was doing when he put that Dennis the Menace DVD in his stocking this year. Of course it will probably give him more ideas.
~I'm going to really sound like a parent for a second now but I SERIOUSLY think my boys drink the shampoo!!! They at least just literally poor money down the drain! I told Max yesterday that we could buy him more toys and we could eat out more if we didn't have to buy so darn much shampoo. He probably thinks now that if he stops pouring it down the drain we can live in a mansion, go on vacations, have all the toys he ever dreamed of, eat out all the time, and drive a super great, fancy, sports car seeing as how the answer to all of our financial woes hinges on whether or not he pours shampoo down the drain. Kids are so literal after all! Do you ever say stupid, overly dramatic things to your kids in frustration or is that just me?!
~It occurred to me yesterday afternoon that maybe Max could use a little more one on one attention from me and his dad. After all he was the baby for 3 1/2 years and now there's little Princess Gracie now to compete for attention with as well as the fact that everyone keeps getting sick and taking attention that way as well. Last night Brian and I were asked to teach his Sunday School class at church from now on. I have about a zillion reservations about doing this but we accepted thinking it will be a great opportunity to spend that one on one time with Max. And you've gotta say yes anyways! Wish us luck!!! Hopefully they don't eat us alive! Max is the worry! He is an angel until WE teach him and then he swings from the rafters...Heaven help us!!
~I can't get enough soup this time of year! I just LOVE it!!! Does anyone have any yummy soup recipes? My mom makes the most delicious chicken stew. So good and back when she did Weight Watchers it was 0 points or just like 1 or 2. Very minimal. I could eat it for lunch and dinner for a week it's so yummy! If you don't mind sharing a good soup recipe please email me at btzmm@yahoo.com Even if I don't know you please share anyway!!!
~I am so glad I don't live in the big metropolis anymore for two very BIG reasons...SUNSHINE AND CLEAR SKYS!!! Every winter the air gets so nasty there and it's just so gray and cloudy from the smog. HORRIBLE!!! I would get really depressed every year at this time because dark, dreariness, lack of sunshine, and being cooped up in the house with kids all day as a stay at home mom eventually wears on you!!! So I am so grateful for sunshine. The last couple of days have been kind of cloudy but that's totally fine sometimes. I love a good cloudy day to make me want to snuggle up on the couch with a warm blanket and a good book. Just not every day for months on end!!!
~Well, that is all...have a good day!!!

I guess I'll call it Fat, Ugly, Old, and Toothless....

~There are millions of people that are joining gyms or going back to the gym as part of their New Year's resolutions. The problem is that by February most of them have lost their motivation and stop going. I'm so pathetic that I can't even find the motivation to only be motivated for a month! I'm in trouble! Luckily I didn't gain any weight over the holidays. At the rate I exercised my elbow it's actually a miracle I didn't gain. I need to do something though. I REFUSE to go on a diet though. I just need to make smarter choices. Add more fruits and veggies to my diet, add more fiber, eat smaller portions, exercise more, drink more water, etc. Stop exercising the elbow so much!!!
~My complection has been terrible for the last year. It's down right yucky! Any suggestions? I think it might be because I'm old. I turn 37 this month!!! THIRTY SEVEN!!!! That my friends..is...OLD!!!
~15 years ago I decided to make some homemade bread. I mixed, kneaded, let it rise, punched it down, shaped it, let it rise again. This is such a process for an impatient person to go through!!! It was worth the wait as I smelled it baking and could almost taste the deliciousness of the bread as I waited for it to finish. You can imagine my disappointment when I took the loaves from the oven and found that they were like unleaven bread! What did I do wrong?! I have no idea! I have only ever attempted making things that require yeast a couple of times since because I just couldn't handle the disappointment. I did find a yummy recipe for breadsticks from my sister in law Stephanie that is tasty, easy, and if I can make it anyone can make it. Yesterday I decided I was in the mood for homemade bread of some kind. I flipped through cookbooks and found a roll recipe that sounded good. I mixed, kneaded, let rise....but wait...they didn't rise. Oh, well maybe if I punch it down, shape into rolls and let rise for the last 30 minutes as directed it will actually rise a little....NOPE!!! Still nothing!!! Well, I decided I had come this far I'd bake them and hope for the best. They rose a teensy, tinsy bit while baking. They tasted good but did not look right AT ALL!!! It's official...yeast is not my friend!!! I would LOVE to find a really tasty whole wheat bread recipe to make that would actually work out. If you have one please share! Please also include very detailed instructions so I might have better luck this time. From the words of W.C. Fields,"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
~I hate cleaning out the car but I'm going to have to do it! I always swore my car would never be disgusting when I had kids. I thought people that had kids and let them make their car nasty were crazy loons and I swore I would never do that! Well, I do that! I cringe every time we move the car seats and see the disgustingness under neat on our cars seat. It's a dirty job and like all other dirty jobs my family create I have to clean it up! Hopefully I don't end up with a fungus...
~I have been in pain morning, noon, and night for like 3 months now. At first the dentist just thought I was clenching my teeth at night and that that was causing my whole mouth to hurt all the time especially when I eat something. After an x-ray he discovered that I have a tooth that I paid $600 five years ago to "fix" with a root canal and crown. Well, it has bothered me ever since and now it has to have the root canal redone which will cost $800-$1200 to have done. I've decided to just have the stupid thing pulled. I am not spending another dime on a stupid tooth that is most likely going to have to be pulled anyway! I have to take ibuprofen round the clock to avoid excruciating pain so although it's not my dream to be toothless or anything I am really, really looking forward to having this tooth taken out tomorrow!!! It will be nice to be pain free in a few days!!!! Can't wait!!!
~I am so grateful for antibiotics and modern medicine. I have been reading a book set in the 1800s and one of the characters is a 6 year old boy who has pneumonia. He struggled for so long and finally over came it in the story. It makes me think about how grateful I am to live in a time when we have medicine, knowledgeable doctors, xrays, elecricity for nebulizers, etc. I think about my Grandma Leota who buried a tiny son who died from an infection from his circumcision the year before penicillin was discovered. How lucky we are to live in this time of wonderful modern medicine. Of course it still doesn't always guarantee anything but it often does and at least gives us a better chance than people who lived not too awfully long ago.
~We played a fun card game over the Christmas break called Swap. It's not the Wife Swap game ;) it's just called Swap and is more like Uno. It is so much fun! My kids are addicted now! If you are looking for a fun new game to try pick it up!
~Well, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and a super fun New Year's Eve! We did! We are getting so old though! We fell asleep in the 11:00 hour. We had even put together puzzles, played games, and ate tons of snacks to try to keep us awake to no avail. I woke up at 12:02. I nudged Brian and said It's 12:02. He said oh, Happy New Year! We kissed quick and went back to sleep. I was ready for bed by 7:30 that night. It's official...we're old!!!

I put some Christmas pictures on my Word From The Zoo blog. Once again if you want an invite just tell me your email address and I'll send ya one!

Just have to get it off my chest!

When I was a very young girl I learned a very important lesson from my big brother Rob that has stayed with me through out my entire life. Don't EVER, EVER agree to scratch someone's back for a football minute!!!! Especially someone who understands the game well enough to happen to pick a minute that will last FOR...EVER!!!!!!! My brother Rob watches every sport ever invented. Therefore, I grew up watching every sport ever invented. I used to love to watch basketball and football games. He of course not only watches professional games but college games as well. I enjoyed watching sports so much I would often skip out on sunday school just to watch the Denver Broncos play. I also ADORED the Chicago Bulls!!! Well, when Brian and I met he loved the Dallas Cowboys and the Utah Jazz and we only had one television so we just chose to not watch any games because it just didn't work out. After a few years Brian picked up watching Dallas Cowboys games again but by then none of my old players I knew and loved on the Broncos were even playing anymore and it just wasn't any fun for me to watch anymore. I just started watching Dallas games too and I really like them now. I still root for the Broncos too but I'm more of a Dallas fan these days. All I had to do was watch a Dallas game occasionally but he never watched any other sports. It was WONDERFUL!!! The last several years he has decided he is a real die hard sports fan! He watches EVERY game of EVERY sport, college AND professional. He even watches games of teams he doesn't like. He's turned into ROB!!!We live with Brian's mom now. So does his brother, Chris. Chris has always watched sports like my brother Rob. That's all they ever watch I swear! SPORTS!!! CONSTANTLY!!! I don't know how much more of this I can bear. I know we have several t.v.'s in the house and I should just watch something but I also really like to spend time with Brian. So seriously though, what is up with watching every.single.game?!?! Including the ones of teams that you HATE?!!! UGGGHHH!!! I just had to get that off my chest!
~Did you know that if you buy a gun at Walmart you have to sign your whole life away, you have to do it between the hours of 9am and 7pm and have a background check, be there for 2 hours for the entire process (well in my case anyway) and it really, really bites?!!! Then once the torture is complete they make a manager walk you to your car with the gun to make sure that you don't give into your frustrations and go postal! If Brian ever wants another gun...I don't care if it's a gift or not...HE has to buy it HIMSELF!!! Oy vey!!!
~We made super cute ornaments today for the tree. Last year we did it too and it was so much fun and easy I decided to do it every year.
~I finally have all of my Christmas shopping done. Finished this morning. Yes it's Christmas Eve and I just finished today but Brian just got paid yesterday so I didn't have a choice.
~Brian's brother Joshua is home for Christmas!!! HOORAY!!! He's the baby of the family. We all adore Joshua! The adults and the kids! He's awesome and we are all so happy to have him around. He is such a nice, fun, happy guy and we miss him when he's away! So glad he gets to be here for 2 weeks!!!
~I finally watched It's A Wonderful Life the other day. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that show! It's one of my all time favorite movies! My mom and I are the only ones who like it in my family so we used to watch it together every year. Now I torture Brian and the kids with it. It's just so good I don't get how anyone wouldn't just love watching it year after year after year!!!
~I'm trying really hard to be happy and not feel sad about not seeing my family this year on Christmas. I'm trying not to think about my parents sitting at home on Christmas day all alone because we are all away. It's just been super sad for me this year for some reason. My brother Rob's birthday is on Christmas day and I always miss him lots that day and his beautiful family. I'm missing my sisters and their families and Nate and his family. I can't listen to I'll Be Home For Christmas without crying this year. I'm such a boob! I'm trying to not be bummed out so I can still make it super fun and happy for the kids. It's just hard because as adults we realize the joy for us comes from interacting with and enjoying time with the people in our lives that we love so much. I just hope all of my family members have a wonderful day and that they know how much I love each and every one of them!!! Merry Christmas to them and to all of you!! And happy birthday Robby!!!! (And happy birthday to my sister Katie's husband Chris who's birthday is also Christmas day!!! We love him too!!)

I posted some pics on Word From The Zoo today if you are invited to that blog check it out. If you aren't ask me for an invite!!

Random thoughts...

~You should always remember to pour your popcorn on a cookie sheet to let the unpopped kernels fall to the bottom and scoop the popped popcorn off and place in your bowl when making caramel corn. I hate biting into caramel corn and almost breaking my teeth on an unpopped kernel.
~Brian wants to get me an expensive present that we can't afford unless he calls it a Christmas/Birthday present since my birthday is in January. Part of me REALLY wants this expensive present but part of me hates to have one present. I mean really, you get 2 real gift getting days all year. Do you really want just one present...for the whole year? I'm still debating on that one. Usually we can't afford either but this year we can or it wouldn't even be an issue.
~Gracie is half crawling. She army crawls and real crawls sometimes. She is getting so big! She loves to play with her brother's cars and action figures and basically anything she can find to chew on. She has 2 teeth now. She is so happy and so pretty. She waves now. She is so much better at eating now which is nice. She is just pure joy!!!!
~Matthew is feeling so much better thank goodness!!!
~My teeth hurt any time I eat anything hot or especially cold. They have hurt for like a month and a half. I'm about to pull my teeth out by myself...anyone have a good set of plyers?!!!
~I MISS MY FAMILY!!! I've been married for 16 years now and we used to take turns spending Christmas with my family one year and Brian's the next until Zack was like 5 and we stopped. I wish we could be with my family this year. I'm especially lonely for them this year for some reason...
~Christmas time is so much fun!!! I just love it!!! It's almost over...
~Does anyone gave any good soup recipes to share? I just love soup this time of year!!! It's the best!!!
~I can't wait for New Year's Eve!! I just love it! We always have a fun little party and the kids just love it!
~Well, I hope everyone has a super fun Christmas!!! And the best New Year EVER!!!

Pneumonia......

Matthew couldn't breathe again when he woke up Friday morning. He puffed on the inhaler 3 times by 9:00 a.m. One time was after he had a fit because I wouldn't let him go to school. It was after all Hat Parade day and wear your p.j.'s to school day for kindergarten and Santa was coming to visit the kindergarten classes. He was NOT happy to be missing it all. When I was in the shower he came running in saying he couldn't breathe. He was panting and couldn't breathe enough to inhale the albuterol when I tried the inhaler on him so I took him to the emergency room. His oxygen level was 83 and they did a chest xray and discovered he has pneumonia. They gave him a breathing treatment and steroids and put him on oxygen and he still wasn't doing well so they admitted him to the hospital. This was the first time one of our children was hospitalized and it freaked us out but we are so grateful they took such great care of him! They gave him i.v. antibiotics and breathing treatments every 4 hours and steroids and he responded so well they let him come home Saturday morning. I was able to sleep in the room with him on my own bed so I could be close to him. My heart went out to those of you who have had children in the hospital for long periods of time. How scary it must have been and how difficult to watch your precious children suffer for so long. I am so grateful to live where we can just go right to the doctor or hospital when we or our children need treatment. Thank heavens for good doctors, attentive nurses, thoughtful volunteers, and friends and family to offer prayers. It has been a wonderful thing to live with Brian's mom and his brother Chris right now. They have helped us so much through swine flu, croop, other colds, and now Matthew's pneumonia and hospitalization. What a comfort it was to just be able to run him to the hospital and know that Gracie, Max, and Zack would be well taken care of!!! Matthew is doing so much better now and actually hated to leave the hospital. He enjoyed having his own t.v., making crafts with mom, having all of mom and dad's undivided attention, and being waited on hand and foot by us and the nurses. We're glad he can breathe again!!!! Breathing is good!!!!!!!!

Dear Santa,

Here is my Christmas list for this year.


~I would really, really appreciate it if I could not have to make dinner for the rest of the month. By dinner time I'm spent and the last thing I want to do is make dinner. I added crock pot meals to the menu thinking that would help the situation but I'm too busy (and lets face it, more than a little scatterbrained) to remember to actually put the food in the crock pot.
~Some cute "mom jeans". I like hip, and cool clothes but I have hips so it really hasn't been working for me. I also have a definite MOM belly after carrying 4 babies. I'm thinking if the jeans were designed really cute and fashionable on the bottom and a little like maternity jeans at the top but instead of being extra stretchy and low, the panel could be made from Spanks and go up extra high then they would be just about right for my body. That would be so great and Brian would especially love these since I wouldn't whine to him every.single.day about my stupid jeans.
~I would also appreciate having a computer that actually works ALL OF THE TIME!!!
~Oh, I was also thinking a lesbian life partner in addition to my husband would be nice. Not for the sex part of course but because I think it would be nice to have a partner that thinks like a woman, acts like a woman, and helps out like a woman. You know, someone that sees what needs to be done and just...does it! Without being asked!!! And when I have conversations with them they would actually respond in the right places instead of just not really saying much or trying to solve the problem they would actually nod, say I know!! or really? or you have GOT to be kidding me?! or NO WAY!!! or stuff that generally lets you know you are having a conversation with a real life person instead of the wall. Also, they would help out with the house work and put the clothes away after I fold them and hang them on hangers since I really hate doing that! They would make the menus, do the grocery shopping, run the kids lunches to school when I forget to send them, plan the budget and make sure I stick to it, pay the bills, make sure the cars are clean and maintained and all the stuff I'm not such a big fan of so I can just hold my baby and enjoy every moment of her babyhood!!! OOOO and I could actually scrapbook once in a while and read books and write and quilt and sew. She would also go shopping with me and tell me what looks cute and what looks like crap. That would be super!!!
~Also, if it wouldn't be too much to ask, I could really use a good vacation! Maybe two of them even. A super nice, romantic, relaxing vacation with my husband and a really super fun, kid friendly one with the whole family. It's been TOOOO long!!!!!

Thanks Santa! You're the greatest!!!
Love,
Tara
~

Too much fun!!!!!

This time of year is so much fun and so crazy! There just isn't time for a whole lot of cleaning!  I think I need a maid. Or at least a full weekend with nothing else to do but clean. That wouldn't be very fun of course. I guess we'll just be a mess until January........

My 2 favorite things....

Tonight I watched Julie and Julia. It is a combination of my two favorite forms of entertainment...blogging and cooking! It was very enjoyable! It is a true story about a woman that is feeling really lost and finds a way in her busy life to enjoy the love she has for writing by blogging. I can relate completely since as many of you know, I started this whole blogging thing during a melt down time in my life. I just didn't feel like my life had meaning or purpose beyond cooking, cleaning, laundry. UGH!!! I told Brian I felt like I had lost my joy.  I didn't know who I was anymore. I felt lost and confused and alone. Being a stay at home mom and wife is not very rewarding at times. Being a mom and wife in general isn't very rewarding at times. You work hard all day long and at the end of the day no one can tell what you did all day, including yourself, because it's all a mess again. It sometimes feels like you're trapped in the movie Groundhog Day. But if you know that is what you are meant to do it's a wonderful thing most of the time. I have my days of feeling really frustrated but most of the time I do love what I do and I wouldn't change it for anything. I just was in such a rut and don't know why but it really sucked and I haven't felt like that since. THANK HEAVENS!!! I think I just had to really evaluate myself and see if this is really what I wanted and needed to do. Once I knew the answer to that question it's been good and I have joy in what I do and realize it is what I WANT and NEED to do!! It's not for everyone but it's for me. Blogging kind of saved ME I guess. The me I couldn't find in the middle of my mom world. It helped me feel like I could do something for me and that was ok. I started out thinking it was a great way to keep family and friends updated on our lives since they don't all live close and don't get to see the kids. It turned into a hobby, passion, ADDICTION!!! I LOVE writing and have always dreamed of writing in some capacity and this is just kind of a fun outlet for that. It also is kind of a journal and that has been super great to go back and read old posts and feel so happy that I actually have a record of our life. It was also a connection to the outside world for me. I totally NEEDED that!!! And still do! Facebook has added to the fun of that of course but blogging is where it started for me. It also at times is kind of like a scrapbook for me without the huge mess for my kids to attack.
It turns out that very few family members are interested enough to ever read my blog and that's ok. It stopped being for that a long time ago. It's my silly, quirky little outlet and I know that many people just don't "get" it and that's ok too. For those of you who DO "get" it and read my blog...THANK YOU!!! I love knowing others like my blog! It makes me happy! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE getting comments from people. I was so sad when my blog was broken and I couldn't get comments.
I'm trying to be brave enough to actually write a fictional story. This particular story has been floating around in my thoughts for about a year now. I'll let you know if I do it. OOOO Scary and exciting all at once!

Let me just start out by saying &%^$ >?@!~&^%(*&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, now that that's out of my system I can go on.  Whew I needed that!!!!


Have you ever known anyone that never misses an opportunity for "I told you so"s and tries to always tear down everyone they ever come in contact with and brings everyone down that they interact with by digging at them and making them feel worse than they did when they ran into you? I know someone like that and I really hope and pray that I can be the complete opposite of that! That when I run into someone I can uplift them and make them feel better for having talked with me and spread a little sunshine around. I know that I'm not like that all the time and that life is hard and sometimes I ooze negativity too but I really don't mean to or want to and I hope I can be better. I know being torn down and brought down and stomped on by someone has a tendency to rub off on those around them and I really hope to rise above it and to be positive and good.
~I LOVE Christmas time! I love the snow, the music, the food, the smells, the lights, the ornaments, the trees, the wreathes, basically everything about it and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE being able to see it all through my little children's eyes! Makes it even more enjoyable!
~We went to my family Christmas party last Friday night. It was tons of fun! The kids made gingerbread houses out of graham crackers and the adults made real gingerbread houses. I was so going to try making my own this year but chickened out and bought one at the last minute for $10. Zack finished his and was moving it from the table and dropped it and all the candy fell off of it and it broke. Poor kid! We decided to let him decorate the one we had bought. He had fun and that's all that matters! This year the kids bought gifts for each other and the adults decided that instead of exchanging gifts this year we would play a white elephant game of sorts. It was actually bingo. Each adult purchased a $5-$10 gift to wrap and bring to the party. The gifts were placed in the middle of the table and each time someone got a bingo they were able to either pick a gift from the middle or trade with someone else if they wanted their gift. Once your bingo card was completetly full you could either open the gift in your hand or steal someone else's to open. It was so much fun!!! Brian ended up with an air soft bb gun and I had a nice bottle of bath and body works lotion and a Christmas towel with a snowman on it. So cute! It was a really fun night!!!
~I finally made pumpkin bars. Now moving on to all of my favorite fattening Christmas goodies! HOORAY!!!
~All of our kids and Brian have had a cold. Matthew hadn't had it yet but started to cough a little here and there on Sunday and I thought for sure he was starting the cold too. That night he was eating some chicken noodle soup for dinner and started having problems breathing. I thought he was having an asthma attack and had Brian give him a puff of albuterol from the inhaler. Well, he just got worse. Brian gave him benedryl. He still didn't improve. I was wondering if it was asthma or if he had accidentally been exposed to nuts or something. He said he didn't breathe the inhaler very well so I decided to give him the liquid albuterol he had left after the swine flu. He got so bad he was not able to catch his breath. I thought I should call 911 but we live really close to the hospital and decided it would be faster to drive him. I was afraid by the time we got to the hospital he wouldn't be breathing at all he was so bad! I expected him to pass out any time. As all of this was running through my mind Brian suggested we use the epipen. Now any of you who know Brian know he doesn't get upset or excited about ANYTHING! If HE is suggesting this it's BAD!!! So I held him down and Brian gave him the shot. Matthew really was very brave through the whole thing I might add! He started breathing better and we took him to the hospital. Once we were there he started doing the barky cough of croup. Matthew had chronic croup from the age of one to about 3 or 4 but hasn't had it for a couple of years. Max has had it a few times and so did Zack when he was a baby. I KNOW what croup sounds like and trust me the kid was not showing signs of croup until we were at the hospital. With croup if you have them in the cold air or if they are drinking ice water or something the restriction in their air way improves and they can breathe better. We wonder if the warm soup made his air way constrict and that's was the problem. We don't know! We do know however that albuterol makes croup worse so the double dose of albuterol didn't help him out at all. Thank heavens we have an epi pen!! Anyway, that was too much excitement for me and I hope I never have to watch him struggle that hard to breathe ever again. SCARY!!! That's the second time in his life he's been that bad and I hope it doesn't happen again!
~Our computer is broken again and I have to share again that is why I don't post very often. Brian is hoping to fix it tonight. Cross your fingers for me please!!! 
~I totally love the setting on blogs that makes it so you are notified of comments made on your blog by email!!! It's the best! BTW: My spell check option is gone on my blog so please don't critique too much. I have been typing with a very chatty 3 year old talking to me and a very squirmy 6 month old on my lap.
~I hope you all are enjoying this fun Christmas time!!! Happy celebrating!!!

Randomness is back in business!!! HOORAY!!!

I'm so excited I just can't stand it! My blog actually updates and keeps comments for the first time in a few weeks!! LOVE IT!!

A little randomness is in order!!! Ok...First thing. Brian thinks it's best to have one really super great gift for Christmas. One big, expensive present to open. I am totally the opposite. I want QUANTITY!!! I have a million little things I would love to have but never spend money on and I want a whole bunch of those things to open up on Christmas morning. He gives me 1 or 2 gifts to open and I usually give him a whole bunch of things to open. I think that while we are both thankful for our gifts we are honestly a little disappointed on Christmas morning. There have been years we haven't had anything under the tree for each other or we would spend $10-$20 each. I would totally think I was cool with it until Christmas morning came around and I'll admit, it was pretty disappointing to not have a single thing under the tree with my name on it. I know that's probably kind of selfish but I can't help it. I would have been totally cool with 10 things from the dollar store wrapped and placed under the tree but Brian would have thought that was at least as bad if not worse than having nothing under the tree. I have always thought it was the difference between our sexes. Boys want big, expensive gifts PERIOD!!! Is there anything under like $200 thats really going to thrill them? I'm thinking not!! Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm the only one that thinks it would be fun to have a whole bunch of inexpensive things under the tree instead of 1 gift. My idea of the perfect Christmas morning would be to have maybe a new bottle of pretty fingernail polish, a little fun scrapbooking packet (even though I never actually scrapbook anymore they are only 5 bucks at WalMart and so fun and cute!!!), a new shirt, a movie or cd I like, a book to read, maybe a necklace or some other piece of costume jewelry (has to be costume!!! I lose everything! AND I don't think I'd feel too comfortable having Gracie suck on a really expensive piece of jewelry but if she wants to slobber all over a $5-$10 piece I'm cool with that), a bottle of Pear Berry or Country Apple lotion from Bath and Body, a fun pair of slippers or slipper socks, a fun kitchen gadget, a new Willow statue to add to my very small collection, I could think of a zillion things like that that would be so super fun to have. So now I'm curious! What do you think? Is it better to have a bunch of gifts to open or 1 super fun, expensive gift? Please comment and even if I don't know you comment anyway!!! I'd love to hear what you all think! 

My boys are obsessed lately with trying to find their six pack stomachs in the mirror! So cute!!!

Gracie is army crawling, sitting up, and ate her first veggies last night. I was going to start with green beans but I felt that would be cruel (I think green beans are vile anyway but some how they found a way to make baby food green beans even worse) so I gave her peas instead. She gagged a few times but ate half a jar so that was a good start. Brian hates peas so he says he doesn't blame her for gagging. We always have both on the table and we did a great job of hiding our dislike of them from Zack until he was 5 years old. Pretty good!

I can't wait to start eating all of the Christmas goodies this year! I still haven't had pumpkin bars yet though, which is an absolute must for me at Thanksgiving so I have to make those first before I can start making Christmas treats.

We strung popcorn for the tree again this year. We did this 6 years ago. It took me a minute to remember why it took me 6 years to want to do it again. It looks so pretty but holy tediousness!!! And THEN I noticed yesterday that my strands were looking sparce in certain areas and found out Zack had been eating the popcorn off of the tree. I let him know we don't do that and that we have plenty of other popcorn to eat and it's actually salted and buttered. It took me hours to string that stuff! Seriously!!!

My mom, my 3 sisters, my sister-in-law, Heidi, my 2 neices, my nephew's girlfriend, and I went to New Moon together Friday morning. It was fun to go with them! I think we should have a girl's night out more often! I would drive the hour for that!! I liked New Moon so much more than I liked Twilight! JACOB!!! HELLLLOOOO!!! Oh to be 17 again and injured near Jacob so he could give me his shirt to soak up the blood. hhhmmmm  Good times!!! I know I'm like really old but he still looked HOT!!! My cousin thinks that makes me a pedafile. I just think it makes me a person with eyes that work!!!

I finally bought a new skirt! HOORAY FOR ME!!! It's been years!!! I told Brian when I was pregnant with Gracie that I was getting a new skirt to wear at the baby blessing because I am sick of wearing the same thing week after week, year after year!!! Well, he lost his job so that didn't happen. I was at the mall and decided just to look in Downeast Outfitters for a sec.  They had the cutest black and white skirt with a little red line in it. My FAVORITE color combination!!! I couldn't resist!!! It was so nice to actually have something cute to wear to church for a change!!!

Our Thanksgiving was really nice! The food was absolutely delicious! My mom is such a fantastic cook and my sisters and sister in law all pitched in wonderful stuff too! I, however, don't have my own kitchen right now and found it difficult to squeeze into my mom's or Brian's mom's the day before Thanksgiving so I took a store bought cheese ball and crackers and some soda pop. Gracie woke up for a bottle at 5:20 a.m., Matthew was having an asthma attack and needed a puff off of the inhaler and some Benedryl, and Max vomited a few minutes later all over my sister's bathroom floor but after that was all cleaned up it was a fun day. He had had greasy, spicy pizza the night before so at least it wasn't a virus that spread through everyone or anything. My friend Melissa was in Utah for Thanksgiving. It was her daughter's year to spend Thanksgiving with her dad so she brought her to him. My mom let me bring Melissa to spend Thanksgiving with our family. It was so fun to see her and to catch up on each other's lives a little bit. She looks fantastic and is so happy! I hope all of you had a wonderful holiday, too!

Flashback Blog Post From Last Year

Oy Vey!!!!


So 2 Christmas' ago I thought it would be SOOO much fun to send a picture of the boys out with our Christmas cards. Trying to get all of the boys smiling and looking in the same direction at the same time turned out to be the impossible dream. Brian was a ward clerk and was at tithing settlement that night so I was on my own and poor Zack had a broken arm (notice the red cast)and had to hold Max who was known to fling all of his body weight in any direction at any given moment. Matthew kept jumping and putting his arm up in the air every time I said to say cheese and would totally mess up the positon I had them in. There were tears. Some were mine some were theirs. When I was looking for a fun Christmas picture to put on my blog I ran across the sequence of pictures I took. I died laughing. NOW I can laugh! I just had to share! I'm hoping it gives you as much of a laugh as it gave me. We did get a few cute ones. It was a Christmas MIRACLE! I haven't done it since. I just don't have the energy.

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