Baptism, Ikea, queso, and 50...what more could a girl ask for!!!

Our nephew was baptized yesterday about 2 hours 45 minutes from where we live. It was a beautiful day! We were happy that we could afford to make it there. It was wonderful to share in Clay's day. Clay's parents divorced a couple years ago. Since then they have each remarried. His dad, Jared is Brian's brother. Jared's new wife is WONDERFUL!!! I have known Jared for 17 years and I have NEVER seen him so happy in all that time! It's been such a great thing to see how happy he and Becky are together. We were all more than a little nervous to go to the baptism because there would be 4 extended families gathered and there are still some...shall we say... harsh feelings there. As we sat in the Relief Society room waiting for the baptism to start I thought WOW this is uncomfortable! The thought came to mind that if people could remember that feeling if thinking of being unfaithful then maybe they would think twice about it. I'm just sayin! Think of your poor innocent extended families who have to be subjected to such experiences for the rest of our lives. And the friends! Hello!!!! SHEESH!!! The ex-wife had the brunch afterwards at her new home. The thought of that was uncomfortable but all in all it was a great day. Everyone acted like civilized grown ups and I think it went much better than any of us could have imagined. I am so glad that Clay chose to be baptized. I am so glad that after all Jared has been through that he and Becky found each other and have brought so much joy to each others lives. He found someone who loves him for him and is good to him and it's refreshing I must say! She has also brought a fun, bright light to the family and we all just love her!
~It was 50 degrees up there yesterday! That was awesome! We didn't even wear jackets! It felt WARM to us compared to the freezing temps we've had this winter. I couldn't get over how things have changed this winter. Usually there is snow up there and then when you drive into our town there isn't any snow or there's very little. This year it's the opposite. We have tons of snow and they didn't have much. We have had 3 or 4 foot piles of snow all up and down the sides of the streets and down the middle of some streets here for weeks as they just keep plowing it. I've never seen anything like it in our town before. The kids LOVED it for a long time! Now they are ready to ride their bikes and want it to all just melt away.
~I got to go to Ikea! I just LOVE Ikea!!! Some people don't appreciate the JOY Ikea has to offer. I know it can feel overwhelming because of the enormity of the building but don't let it scare you. I've been there enough now that I know to just skip the upstairs floor unless you are buying furniture, cabinets, or you just need some ideas. It's just the display area. I do go upstairs to the kids department and sometimes we eat up there. 99 cent kids meals!!! And they have really good chicken strips! Then we head right back downstairs. We browse through all the fun departments down there and I usually find some great little tokens along the way. I just LOVE Ikea!!! Thanks to Brian and the boys for being such great sports and not even complaining very much! Gracie was totally happy like me!
~I can't wait for the Super Bowl! I don't know what teams are actually playing in the Super Bowl this year but we are going to eat some sandwiches, have 7 layer dip, french onion dip, and queso dip made with the big block of velveeta and two cans of rotel tomatoes. I CAN'T WAIT!!! Pop and brownies to finish things off. It's going to be a great splurging day! Love those days! AND I always get a kick out of the commercials! They are the best part after all!
~After I made this post I read my cousin John's blog and he had this link that is so neat! It's about LDS members affected by the quake. He served his mission in Haiti for 4 months in the early 90's before being sent to Florida once the conditions in Haiti became too dangerous for the missioaries to stay there. Just thought I'd share the link. It is very touching! The people's testimonies and strength are very inspiring!  http://www.meridianmagazine.com/churchupdate/100202church.html

http://www.tarasyummyrecipes.blogspot.com/

Wanted: Substitute mom for a day......

For just one day!!! It's going to be such a hectic, crazy, busy day and I woke up on the wrong side of the bed so it's going to be a bumpy ride.................

Scary.....

Last night I was sitting on our bed, Brian was sitting in our rocker recliner, and Gracie was crawling around on the bedroom floor playing with toys. I looked up to check on her at one point and she was looking at me with her big brown eyes with her head cocked funny and with it wedged under the front left corner of the rocker. Panic coursed through every vein and I told Brian not to move and ran to Gracie. After pulling her out from under the rocker I held her tightly to me and kissed her sweet face and shook as I considered the damage that could have been done to my beautiful daughter if her 200 plus pound father would have rocked forward onto her little head. I have been completely freaked out ever since! I woke up at 3:30 and after a few minutes that picture of her head under the rocking chair and her big brown eyes looking at me popped into my head and I can't get it out of my mind. It literallyl leaves me sick to my stomach!!! I pray every morning that our children will be protected from harm and serious accident since they are generally CRAZY and I worry all the time about them hurting themselves or each other. Sometimes that prayer gets to be routine but yesterday morning I just really had an uneasy feeling and prayed sincerely for each of them. I am so grateful that prayer was answered!!! If I hadn't been in the room or hadn't looked up just then who knows what would have happened. I am just so grateful for her health and that everything is ok but now my mind is running over the "what ifs". What if I'm not around if she does that again. What if one of the kids is sitting in the rocking chair if that happens again. What if...what if...what if?! Why do minds do things like that at 3:30 A.M. when you don't have anything else to distract your brain. Anyway, I know that sometimes things...just happen. That is the scariest part of parenthood for me. Knowing that some things either...just happen or things happen for a reason that we don't want to happen and we don't understand the reason and it's not what WE want and there isn't anything we can do about it. We just pray and hope that things work out and hope that if they don't work out like we hope that we'll have the strength to endure that challenge. Now I just hope my mind will shut off after I shut off this computer and will let me catch some much needed sleep...wish me luck!!!

This and that...

~FYI: Apparently there is a limit on how long you should leave rechargeable camera batteries on the charger. We didn't discover this by reading the directions. No that would be much too easy! We discovered this by leaving the batteries on the charger too long and the acid started oozing out of them. Apparently overnight is TOO long!!! OOPS!!
~Today I wanted to smack a chick! She was walking down the street with her son in a stroller. He had a coat on. But NO SOCKS!!! It was like 25 degrees today! He was 18 months to a year old I'm guessing. Think how freezing cold your feet get in the morning. Inside your house. Now imagine being outside for who knows how long without socks on your feet in 25 degree weather. I can't imagine what was going through this chicks head! One time I saw a woman with a baby with a onesie and that's it in the dead of winter. Of course the mom had on a coat and warm shoes and long pants. I just can't figure out what the heck people are thinking. At least figure if you are wearing 3 layers of clothing your baby needs 3 layers of clothing too! It's winter....put socks on your baby!!!!! Geez Louise!!!!
~I am so glad Brian doesn't work for an accounting firm this year. NO MORE BUSY SEASON this year!!! I LOVE that!! We actually get to see him! AWESOME!!!
~Have you seen the movie Up? It is the cutest show! We laugh every time we watch it! I usually don't watch the kids shows with them anymore but I do watch this one with them. Enjoyable for adults as well as kids. It's my new favorite!
~Did you ever notice how Sunbeams (the sunday school class I teach at church with 3 and 4 year olds) have absolutely NO BOUNDARIES!!! We had a little girl in our class today that we hadn't had in class before. I knew her for all of 20 minutes before she started leaning on me and pulling my skirt up on the side of my leg repeatedly and basically MAULING me! I wouldn't have minded that much except that she sucks her thumb too. She has slobber stringing from her thumb every time she takes her thumb out of her mouth. Then she touches Gracie's toy. I'm not sure this germaphobe can handle Sunbeams with a baby!!! They are awfully cute and I like the calling most of the time but I'm just not very good with bodily functions and secretions!!!
~Some people are just so dang good at what they do that you just can't get over how good they are! The song leader in primary in our ward is OUTSTANDING!!! The kids love her and she does and excellent job and I am in awe of her each week. One of my most favorite parts of a primary calling is that I get to hear and sing the primary songs. They are so wonderful and nothing is sweeter than the voices of the little primary children singing the beautiful primary songs. I just love it!

Stick a fork in us...we are DEFINITELY done!!!! (we think!!!)

We think we've finally decided that we are DEFINITELY done having babies. We've been deciding this for quite some time now. It's been quite difficult for me to finally, officially make the decision that we're DONE. When we decided to have children it was really a no brainer. We loved each other and wanted to have kiddos and I was having problems that the dr. said would cause me to have difficulty getting pregnant so we just decided 6 months into our marriage that we'd leave it up to the Lord and when he saw fit to bless us with a child we'd be super happy!!! 6 years, 3 miscarriages, trillions of tears, many blessings and prayers later...our little Zackary was born. I will never forget the joy I felt as I held him in my arms in the hospital room when they brought him to me after they cleaned him up and Brian had gone home for some zzzzs after a very looooonnnggg day and night. It was just me and him. He was kind of funny looking with his cone shaped head but he was mine and of course I thought he was the most beautiful baby EVER!!! I remember counting his fingers and toes and praying and thanking my Heavenly Father for sending this precious baby to me. It was a beautiful moment I will always cherish. Each of our children have been such a blessing to us. I didn't expect to have my first baby at the age of 27, #2 at 30, #3 at 33, and my 4th at 36. The older I am the HARDER the pregnancy. My first and second pregnanies were great! Especially the second. The delivery and recovery were even great for me physically. Emotionally it was the hardest since Matty had to be resussitated when he finally was out of me and that scared us to death! He was the dreamiest baby and I think part of it was that I was so much more relaxed with him. I had done this before and Zack was still alive so I must not be too bad at this. I could do it again. Well, my pregnancy with Max was a little more difficult. I was EXHAUSTED beyond anything I had ever felt before! I was also older and I could tell! I felt more queezy too and just not so hot. I was POSITIVE he was a girl because my pregnancy was so much different than it had been before and I actually felt worse than I had before. I never felt 100% with my pregnancies but I never was very sick at all. Never threw up except the occasional gag from my tooth brush. With him I felt a little rougher. I thought each of my boys was kind of difficult to keep up with until I had Max. Well, I still can't decide if it was just Max or the combination of Max and Matthew. There came a time when I felt strongly I should just stop preventing pregnancy again and leave it up to the Lord again but I was TERRIFIED because I didn't know how I would ever handle another baby since the destruction and craziness of Max and Matthew were about to kill me off. After a while I was sad that we hadn't had a baby yet and then we went somewhere I can't remember where. We didn't need a stroller or a diaper bag. The kids were at great ages. I decided maybe I didn't want to have another baby after all so I took all the clothes and garb to D.I. and figured we would make things permanent and we could move on with our lives and it was going to be great! The next month I found out I was pregant with Gracie. First, I was SCARED to death!!! Then, I was sick as a dog. I lived the next 4 months in a constant state of nausea. I felt like I was car sick and had a stomach virus. You know the feeling where if you just hold still enough you don't feel like you are going to lose your lunch but any movement makes you feel like you are just going to lose it! Well,the only problem with that was I had 3 other children to take care of and that was pretty rough. I am such a wimp. I kept thinking of women I know like Tara, Cassie, Anna, and Heidi who get so incredibly sick it isn't even funny. I had been so blessed with my previous pregnancies. I just KNEW this time it was a girl because I had truly NEVER felt like this and people said that was usually a sign that it was the opposite sex of what you already had. Surprisingly I only threw up 5 times the whole time but I WISHED I could throw up and feel better the rest of the time. Packing the kids in the car to take Zack to school and pick him up and to take Matty to preschool and pick him up and grocery shopping and every other thing that required a drive in the car felt like a nightmare! Carsick on top of carsick was NOT fun! Doing dishes or any household task became increasingly difficult. I only bathed the kids when I couldn't remember how long it had been since they had had a bath. I know...terrible!!! It was a horrible 4 months!!! Then once I felt better I experienced so many ups and downs wondering if I could REALLY do this again! And with a GIRL!!! I didn't know anything about girls. Well, sure, I was one but I'd been the mom of boys for 9 years and knew NOTHING about girls anymore! The maternity books call it "misgivings". I call it SCARED TO DEATH!!!! The MOMENT they handed me my sweet little Gracie Sue all of the worries and fears and "misgivings" went away. I could do it! She was the sweetest baby! She has adored me from day one and I have adored her right back along with each member of our family! She is a total mama's girl. She's turning into quite the little daddy's girl, too! The minute she hears his voice when he comes home for lunch and after work she crawls to where ever he is as fast as she can. She flirts with him and smiles the sweetest smile at him. One day she had a dress on and got stuck and just sat there staring at him making this funny noise to get his attention until he came and picked her up and then she just SMILED at him! She LOVES him so much! Of course she has him wrapped around her little finger! He's always been such a wonderful father and has always loved his kids so much. They have all thought he was the greatest! It has been such a beautiful thing to watch! Our whole little family is absolutely SMITTEN with Gracie and we can't imagine life without her! Heavenly Father knew we needed her! She brings us so much joy and I just can't tell you how grateful I am that she is a part of our family. By the end of the pregnancy I was POSITIVE we were done making people. This factory was shutting down! I NEVER wanted to feel like that again! I was having such a hard time breathing and I had several panic attacks because I couldn't breathe. I also started feeling sick again during the last month. I told Brian I wanted him to do something permanent because I NEVER wanted to feel that way again and I NEVER wanted to FORGET how horrible I felt and do it again!!! Well, Gracie has been such a wonderful baby that I just kind of forget sometimes and think about how wonderful it would be to bring another precious child into the world. The hard part is that EVERYONE in the family suffers when mom can't function fully for 4 months straight. Things slip and we are STILL trying to get back to normal. Gracie has been a wonderful baby...as long as I am holding her CONSTANTLY since the day she was born!!! But if I'm holding her I don't have to be doing anything special like bouncing, playing, walking...just holding. I have had to cook many meals while holding her. I've loaded and unloaded the dishwasher many times while holding her. She eats well. She sleeps well. She is super easy to keep happy. All she needs is ME!!! As wonderful as that is it hinders my ability to keep up with my duties as a mother and housewife. It takes a lot out of everyone to have another baby. But all that said. Are we done?! It sounds like it would be the easiest decision to come to EVER! But it isn't! Are there any other babies in Heaven that are meant to be part of our family forever. It's a big decision to make! It's one of the most important decisions we'll ever make. We need to KNOW! You know! If we KNOW then we can officially decide and proceed in whatever direction that decision takes us. We need to earnestly pray about it, I know! But I'm afraid of the answer! I'm afraid of EITHER answer!!! I don't think I want to do this whole thing again but I also don't know if I'm ready for this part of my life to be finished. I LOVE my kids so much! I love each of their personalities and I love the beautiful parts of the whole process of bringing new lives into the world. If I could GUARANTEE that the pregnancy would be just like my pregnancy with Matthew minus the scary parts, of course, then I would do it 10 more times. Unfortunately there are NO guarantees! Once you KNOW do you ever have regrets about the decision? If you have had this experience where you KNEW that you were done and you stopped please tell me your feelings about it. Maybe it will help me out! I'm afraid we'll make a permanent decision and later regret it! UGGHH!!

My "powers are weak"....

~My kids built the sweetest snowman the other day. It was their dad and he was holding a baby snowman that was Gracie. How cute are they?!
~For some reason the boys have started using a shovel somehow when they build the snowmen and now it's buried in new snow. OOOOPS!!!
~Our primary class went really well Sunday. They are ADORABLE kids!!! Max gave his talk. Well, he stood there while I gave the talk. It was only his second time to go to big kid primary and he got stage fright. No tears just...speechless. Matthew volunteered in his class to give a talk this week. We're trying to be SO PROUD of his desire to give talks in primary. The topic is "We believe in God the Eternal Father and in His Son Jesus Christ." Not too difficult at least. I was proud of Matthew for volunteering to recite the first article of faith in primary last Sunday. He did a great job! He's pretty shy so I was surprised he did it!!! He's very brave!
~My "powers are weak"!! I decided to shovel Ruth's driveway yesterday. I could use the exercise and her super nice neighbor who usually plows it with is 4-wheeler didn't come over and plow so I just figured what the heck might as well. I only lasted an hour and only shoveled like a quarter of it. It totally kicked my trash!! I'm so sore today! The neighbor came by this morning thankfully since it snowed at least the same amount last night as the night before. Can't get over how much snow we have!! My biggest problem is that it started kind of melting on the bottom but there were still several inches on top of that so I was shoveling slush and snow. HEAVY STUFF!!! I am pathetically out of shape!!!
~I have almost finished another book. It's only taken me weeks of reading a sentence here a paragraph there. I haven't been sleeping well so I have been reading at night when I can't fall asleep and in the morning when I wake up at 4am and can't fall back to sleep and finally give in and read. I only have like 30 pages left. I LOVE reading! I am so glad my mom shares her books with me. She gives me the books in perfect shape. You can't even tell they have been read. Then I return them with covers and pages bent. I even spilled a little water on this one. I feel just terrible returning them in such shape but she never complains and is so nice about it. I appreciate it so much! After carrying a book around for weeks it starts to show wear. Especially when I have a super cute little 3 year old running around destroying everything in his path. Anyway, I have really enjoyed this book. It's set in the 1870's and it makes me so grateful for blessings, conveniences, medicine, emergency services, lots of things we take for granted every day! I am spoiled and so grateful for that! So glad I can throw a load of clothes in the washing machine and then in the dryer, load and unload the dishwasher, turn on a light when I need it. DRIVE to the store if I need a loaf of bread, jam, fruit, vegetables, milk, butter, etc., etc. I can buy my family socks instead of knitting them myself. Use the very convenient freezer, frig, toilet, shower, furnace, air conditioner, school bus system. On and on I could go!

I quit!?!?

Last night I was thinking of quitting my job. Today is a new day thank goodness! I think I'll keep the job!!! It's snowing too! It's so beautiful to watch! I love waking up to see a blanket of snow covering everything! I'm just going to be happy and ENJOY the kids and the "job" I have. Soon enough I'll be "unemployed" ...and then I'll wish for this time back. Gotta take the time to ENJOY it while it lasts!!!!

Love it!!!!

I am a HUGE fan of Gilmore Girls!!! I didn't actually discover it until the summer of 2006 (unbeknownst to me at the time they had just had the SERIES finale the month before) when I started watching the reruns while I prepared lunch for the kids and cleaned up the mess. I instantly fell in love with Lorelei and Rory!!! Not to mention...LUKE!!! Hubba Hubba!!! I own the DVD box set of Gilmore Girls and every thing! They are my FAVORITE!!! All I have to do is hear the theme song and I feel happy! I smile, dance, and sing! It's the best!!! Well, I decided to change my ringtone today to something fun and I thought of the theme song to Gilmore Girls. I've had 2 calls since I changed it and it just makes me so happy to hear it! I should have done this a long time ago! I have REALLY needed a pick me up lately and something to try to keep me positive and in a good mood even though things around me aren't always going so well. Music has such a HUGE influence on my moods and I'm hoping this will help a little. If I answer the phone by singing that song instead of saying hello just go with it! I put the song on my play list so turn up the volume and listen to the song and SMILE!!!

My keester survived!!!

~We went ice skating today with Brian's brother Jared and his wife Becky, their kids, Becky's family, and Brian's Mom and brother Chris came along to watch. Well, it was the first time for all of us and it was a lot of fun! I was a HUGE chicken poo and couldn't bring myself to step on the ice with both skates. Finally, Chris let me hold on to his arm (he was in tennis shoes and didn't slip at all) and he we went around the rink once. My knees were killing me! I was so afraid of falling and breaking my tailbone...again!!! Thankfully I made it back to safety! I almost kissed the ground when I stepped off the ice. I changed out of my ice skates, put my shoes back on and let my little Max around the ice. He didn't fare so well! He started running on the ice and slipped and fell and landed on his poor little noggin. He had a bad head ache after that! Poor little guy! Brian did a FANTASTIC job!!! Matty did super well, too. Zack got the hang of it eventually. I was so proud of them for trying and trying over and over!!! Becky brought hot chocolate for everyone. Her friend brought my FAVORITE...SCOTCHEROOS!!! LOVE them!!! And Zacky made some brownies to share. It was a great time! I'll post pictures on my word from the zoo blog soon. Even though I'm a chicken I can officially say I have tried ice skating now and I can mark it off my bucket list.
~I am the WORST at writing in a journal. My blogs have really helped this along I think. I mean at least I have SOME sort of record of our lives and our comings and goings and my feelings on things. Well, another great journal resource is my calendars. I keep our calendars every year. Some people think it's very weird that I do this but it has come in handy many times as a reference for when certain things happened. Also it's kind of fun to look back over the events written on the calendar. The other day I was looking over my 2009 calendar and last year about a week ago we had the ultrasound that told us we were having a precious little girl. It was kind of fun to think back on a year ago. Anyway, I hope you all keep your calendars as well. What better journals of what actually goes on in our lives and some of the fun activities we took part in.
~Tomorrow is the big day...our first day teaching Max's church class. He also gets to give his first ever talk in church. I'm excited and kind of nervous.
~I am so thankful for my children! I love each of them so much and hope they all know that! Some times life gets so crazy and one or the other gets more attention than the others and I worry about how they are handling everything and if they all feel enough love from us.
~Brian took Zack on a date in May to a baseball game. In July he took Matthew on a date to the Rodeo. Max has been REALLY needing attention so Brian decided to take him to see Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 last night for their date. He really had fun and looked forward to it all day. I hope we can be better about doing that this year with the kids. Maybe do it twice with each kid. It's kind of nice because it makes them feel so special and it's not too expensive since it's just 2 people going. The kids LOVE it and that's the whole point of it!
~Well, I hope everyone has a great day and that things are going well for everyone!!!

LOVE don't JUDGE!!!!!!

I just HAVE to vent this! We have a couple of people in our lives that we absolutely LOVE and have done A LOT for and they have gossiped about us which has effected our family and church relationships. It is SO hard!!! EVERYONE needs to have the support of family and church! EVERYONE needs to have friendships with others and to be able to have help in times of trial and to have others to celebrate the joys of life with. It is so cruel, spiteful, and vindictive!!! The one person has done this for years to us so although it has never gotten any easier to accept it is expected. But I think the other person's actions may hurt more than anything. This person is someone that we trusted. Someone that vented many feelings to us and we in turn vented back. Apparently this was just a lovely little ploy to get some gossip material to tell to others. We have done A LOT for this person just because we are nice. It wasn't asked of us. It wasn't expected of us. We just did it to try to be nice because we love this person and want the person to be happy. To find out that the ENTIRE  time we have been showing kindness and love towards them they were talking horribly about us is just such a betrayal!!! Why would anyone intentionally try to cause others to have bad feelings towards us. I just don't understand it. I NEVER have understood it and most likely I never will understand it! I just wish things could be different. That pople could erase the things that have been told to them and just love us and use their own judgement instead of being so influenced by these two people. Gossip is so hurtful and hateful and we have dealt with others gossiping about us for so long it's ridiculous. I used to not care what others thought. Now I do. It hurts. Like I said EVERYONE deserves to have the love and support of others and to have others ruin that for us is just frustrating and difficult. I hope we can all try to love each other and be kinder to each other. Less judgemental and more tolerant of others. Try to understand where others may be coming from instead of just automatically judging them. The world would be a better place.

Cute girl!

~Yesterday my little cute Gracie (7 months old) was sitting on my lap while I was applying my make up and The Today Show was on. When they were panning through the audience that stands outside the studio as they went to commercial apparently Gracie thought they were all smiling and waving at her so she smiled and waved back. So cute!!!
~Today I was standing in the bathroom holding Gracie and letting her look in the mirror. Usually she just looks at the mirror with a confused look on her little face. Today she was smiling when she looked at the mirror and saw the CUTEST little girl on Earth and just couldn't resist smiling back and waving at her reflection. It was the sweetest thing!!!

My b-day. The big 3-7!!! WOW I'm OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~My mom, my sister Stephanie and Steph's son Josh came to town to take me to lunch for my birthday. It was nice to spend time with them! My mom made me a cake and brought it with her and I thought that was very nice of her! It's interesting how most birthdays come and go and I don't even care but this year it seemed more important to me. Meant more to me. I don't know why that is but I sure did appreciate all of the nice gestures by everyone to make the day more special!!!
~I'm kind of wishing I would have asked Brian to take the day off so he could watch the kids for me and make dinner for me and do the laundry and basically give me a break for a day.I always feel like I'm able to give more as a mom and be better and nicer when I have a little time to relax and just BE once in a while. Does that make me selfish or does that make me normal and human?
~Man I can't believe how dry it is here! We are going through Aveeno like crazy and my hands are still cracked and bleeding. My feet are atrocious!!! I stocked up on a good foot cream, foot scrub, and pumice stone the other day. I sure hope it helps!!!
~I've decided we should buy stock in kleenex, cold medicine, ibuprofen, tylenol, hand sanitizer, and lotion before next winter. By Spring we'll be raking in the cash!!!!! We've spent an absolute fortune on these things this year. Not to mention copays for Dr. and dentist visits, prescriptions, hospital visits, and cough drops. Sheesh!!!!
~I'm having an -I really miss my dad- day!!! When I woke up this morning I was thinking about how special my birthdays were when I was a little kid. At my mom's house she would get a baby sitter and take me out to eat and I could pick where ever I wanted to eat. It was just me, Mom, and Stan. She would also make us our favorite cake and we would have ice cream. I don't remember anything about the gifts although there were gifts I just remember the feelings I had of being special and getting to do special things on my special day. She also made cupcakes and took them to school for a treat for me to share with my class that day. When we went to my Dad's for Christmas break he would always have a party for me. My birthday was in the middle of January so we wouldn't see each other on my birthday but he always made a special point to have a party for me while we were together. He would always make a special dinner for me. My most favorite dinner always was and always will be spaghetti. Italian in general really. For a few years in a row he actually made the spaghetti noodles from scratch and the sauce from scratch. I am sure there were presents and a cake involved there too and but once again I can't remember those details just the feelings of being special and having a special day. I told Brian about it when I woke up and thought about it all day. I was able to spend some time time with my mom and sister and that was so nice and then dinner with my family and cake and ice cream. I was missing my dad. He always called and wished me happy birthday and I know that he loved me. He wasn't perfect. None of us are. But he was a person in my life that I knew loved me, and wanted me to be happy. I loved him too and miss him!!!!!
~So Brian gave me the BEST gift for my birthday!!! He knows how addicted I am to facebook and blogging and how hard it's been to not have my own computer since we've lived with his mom and our computer is broken so he bought me one of those tiny little computers. They had them at Walmart for $229.00 so he got me one. I absolutely LOVE it!!! I don't remember when I've had a more perfect gift!!! Now I just need to keep Max away from it and I'll be in great shape!!! Brian also made one of my favorite cakes ever. My mom's strawberry cake. So delicious!!! And it's a "from scratch" recipe and everything. LOVE it! LOVE that he made it for me!!! What a great guy!!!!

My ring....

One of the prongs on my wedding ring bent a couple of weeks ago so I took it into the jewelry store to have it fixed. They said it also needed to have the prongs replaced or redone or something because they were so worn down. I have been without it for over 2 weeks and finally got it back last night. I missed it so much! I've been wearing it for 17 years now (well February it will be the 17th anniversary of our engagement) and it is just kind of...part of me, you know. It's just always there and to not have it made me appreciate it even more once it was back. It looks so BEAUTIFUL again too! It was REALLY, REALLY dirty! Mommyhood is a DIRTY job!!! Anyway, I mostly love the feelings behind which all came flooding back to me of when Brian gave it to me and asked me to be his wife. And when he placed it on my finger at the temple after we were sealed for time and all eternity. To me it is special and lovely and will always be a part of me and a wonderful symbol of our love for each other. I once had a sister in law (she and my brother in law have since divorced) who, after a year of marriage traded her ring in on a new model. Yes! She did this! It still blows my mind! To be completely honest, my ring is much more flashy than anything I would have ever chosen for myself. I would have chosen a plain white or yellow gold band with a single diamond in the middle if I were the one doing the choosing because I'm just more simple and plain I suppose. Well, Brian chose this ring for me and presented it to me with LOVE and I will always cherish it and LOVE it more than any other ring on earth because HE gave it to me and it is our SYMBOL, you know?! Not having it really got me thinking these last couple of weeks about all the ring symblolizes for us. I was almost as happy last night to have it back as I was to get it from him the first time he gave it to me. I seriously got teary. I hope you all take a moment to remember back to the sweet moment your husband asked you to marry him. Think back on those feelings. Think about what the ring symbolizes and the feelings and emotions that were wrapped up in that beautiful moment that was sealed with a kiss and a ring.....

If you can read this you are in my way...

~I found a t-shirt I need to get. It looks like an eye chart and said If you can read this you are in my way. Cracked me up!!! I think my sister Katie would like it too!!! hehehe
~The other night while Brian and I were making dinner Max decided it would be super fun to smear Vaseline all over the rim of the toilet. When I walked in the bathroom after he had gone to bed and saw it my mind was having a hard time processing what my eyes were seeing. Did someone do that vaseline on the toilet prank??? No who would do such a thing??? Zack? NO!!!! Matthew? No.? Max (age 3)? Well, sure!!!!! After all he once painted the garbage can with honey using an actual paint brush. No one else's mind works like this!! So the next morning we asked him about it and he said he didn't do it. It was a ghost boy. He tried to stop him but he wouldn't listen and did it anyway. If he wasn't so stinking cute I just don't know what would have happened to him by now! Santa totally knew what he was doing when he put that Dennis the Menace DVD in his stocking this year. Of course it will probably give him more ideas.
~I'm going to really sound like a parent for a second now but I SERIOUSLY think my boys drink the shampoo!!! They at least just literally poor money down the drain! I told Max yesterday that we could buy him more toys and we could eat out more if we didn't have to buy so darn much shampoo. He probably thinks now that if he stops pouring it down the drain we can live in a mansion, go on vacations, have all the toys he ever dreamed of, eat out all the time, and drive a super great, fancy, sports car seeing as how the answer to all of our financial woes hinges on whether or not he pours shampoo down the drain. Kids are so literal after all! Do you ever say stupid, overly dramatic things to your kids in frustration or is that just me?!
~It occurred to me yesterday afternoon that maybe Max could use a little more one on one attention from me and his dad. After all he was the baby for 3 1/2 years and now there's little Princess Gracie now to compete for attention with as well as the fact that everyone keeps getting sick and taking attention that way as well. Last night Brian and I were asked to teach his Sunday School class at church from now on. I have about a zillion reservations about doing this but we accepted thinking it will be a great opportunity to spend that one on one time with Max. And you've gotta say yes anyways! Wish us luck!!! Hopefully they don't eat us alive! Max is the worry! He is an angel until WE teach him and then he swings from the rafters...Heaven help us!!
~I can't get enough soup this time of year! I just LOVE it!!! Does anyone have any yummy soup recipes? My mom makes the most delicious chicken stew. So good and back when she did Weight Watchers it was 0 points or just like 1 or 2. Very minimal. I could eat it for lunch and dinner for a week it's so yummy! If you don't mind sharing a good soup recipe please email me at btzmm@yahoo.com Even if I don't know you please share anyway!!!
~I am so glad I don't live in the big metropolis anymore for two very BIG reasons...SUNSHINE AND CLEAR SKYS!!! Every winter the air gets so nasty there and it's just so gray and cloudy from the smog. HORRIBLE!!! I would get really depressed every year at this time because dark, dreariness, lack of sunshine, and being cooped up in the house with kids all day as a stay at home mom eventually wears on you!!! So I am so grateful for sunshine. The last couple of days have been kind of cloudy but that's totally fine sometimes. I love a good cloudy day to make me want to snuggle up on the couch with a warm blanket and a good book. Just not every day for months on end!!!
~Well, that is all...have a good day!!!

I guess I'll call it Fat, Ugly, Old, and Toothless....

~There are millions of people that are joining gyms or going back to the gym as part of their New Year's resolutions. The problem is that by February most of them have lost their motivation and stop going. I'm so pathetic that I can't even find the motivation to only be motivated for a month! I'm in trouble! Luckily I didn't gain any weight over the holidays. At the rate I exercised my elbow it's actually a miracle I didn't gain. I need to do something though. I REFUSE to go on a diet though. I just need to make smarter choices. Add more fruits and veggies to my diet, add more fiber, eat smaller portions, exercise more, drink more water, etc. Stop exercising the elbow so much!!!
~My complection has been terrible for the last year. It's down right yucky! Any suggestions? I think it might be because I'm old. I turn 37 this month!!! THIRTY SEVEN!!!! That my friends..is...OLD!!!
~15 years ago I decided to make some homemade bread. I mixed, kneaded, let it rise, punched it down, shaped it, let it rise again. This is such a process for an impatient person to go through!!! It was worth the wait as I smelled it baking and could almost taste the deliciousness of the bread as I waited for it to finish. You can imagine my disappointment when I took the loaves from the oven and found that they were like unleaven bread! What did I do wrong?! I have no idea! I have only ever attempted making things that require yeast a couple of times since because I just couldn't handle the disappointment. I did find a yummy recipe for breadsticks from my sister in law Stephanie that is tasty, easy, and if I can make it anyone can make it. Yesterday I decided I was in the mood for homemade bread of some kind. I flipped through cookbooks and found a roll recipe that sounded good. I mixed, kneaded, let rise....but wait...they didn't rise. Oh, well maybe if I punch it down, shape into rolls and let rise for the last 30 minutes as directed it will actually rise a little....NOPE!!! Still nothing!!! Well, I decided I had come this far I'd bake them and hope for the best. They rose a teensy, tinsy bit while baking. They tasted good but did not look right AT ALL!!! It's official...yeast is not my friend!!! I would LOVE to find a really tasty whole wheat bread recipe to make that would actually work out. If you have one please share! Please also include very detailed instructions so I might have better luck this time. From the words of W.C. Fields,"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
~I hate cleaning out the car but I'm going to have to do it! I always swore my car would never be disgusting when I had kids. I thought people that had kids and let them make their car nasty were crazy loons and I swore I would never do that! Well, I do that! I cringe every time we move the car seats and see the disgustingness under neat on our cars seat. It's a dirty job and like all other dirty jobs my family create I have to clean it up! Hopefully I don't end up with a fungus...
~I have been in pain morning, noon, and night for like 3 months now. At first the dentist just thought I was clenching my teeth at night and that that was causing my whole mouth to hurt all the time especially when I eat something. After an x-ray he discovered that I have a tooth that I paid $600 five years ago to "fix" with a root canal and crown. Well, it has bothered me ever since and now it has to have the root canal redone which will cost $800-$1200 to have done. I've decided to just have the stupid thing pulled. I am not spending another dime on a stupid tooth that is most likely going to have to be pulled anyway! I have to take ibuprofen round the clock to avoid excruciating pain so although it's not my dream to be toothless or anything I am really, really looking forward to having this tooth taken out tomorrow!!! It will be nice to be pain free in a few days!!!! Can't wait!!!
~I am so grateful for antibiotics and modern medicine. I have been reading a book set in the 1800s and one of the characters is a 6 year old boy who has pneumonia. He struggled for so long and finally over came it in the story. It makes me think about how grateful I am to live in a time when we have medicine, knowledgeable doctors, xrays, elecricity for nebulizers, etc. I think about my Grandma Leota who buried a tiny son who died from an infection from his circumcision the year before penicillin was discovered. How lucky we are to live in this time of wonderful modern medicine. Of course it still doesn't always guarantee anything but it often does and at least gives us a better chance than people who lived not too awfully long ago.
~We played a fun card game over the Christmas break called Swap. It's not the Wife Swap game ;) it's just called Swap and is more like Uno. It is so much fun! My kids are addicted now! If you are looking for a fun new game to try pick it up!
~Well, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and a super fun New Year's Eve! We did! We are getting so old though! We fell asleep in the 11:00 hour. We had even put together puzzles, played games, and ate tons of snacks to try to keep us awake to no avail. I woke up at 12:02. I nudged Brian and said It's 12:02. He said oh, Happy New Year! We kissed quick and went back to sleep. I was ready for bed by 7:30 that night. It's official...we're old!!!

I put some Christmas pictures on my Word From The Zoo blog. Once again if you want an invite just tell me your email address and I'll send ya one!

Just have to get it off my chest!

When I was a very young girl I learned a very important lesson from my big brother Rob that has stayed with me through out my entire life. Don't EVER, EVER agree to scratch someone's back for a football minute!!!! Especially someone who understands the game well enough to happen to pick a minute that will last FOR...EVER!!!!!!! My brother Rob watches every sport ever invented. Therefore, I grew up watching every sport ever invented. I used to love to watch basketball and football games. He of course not only watches professional games but college games as well. I enjoyed watching sports so much I would often skip out on sunday school just to watch the Denver Broncos play. I also ADORED the Chicago Bulls!!! Well, when Brian and I met he loved the Dallas Cowboys and the Utah Jazz and we only had one television so we just chose to not watch any games because it just didn't work out. After a few years Brian picked up watching Dallas Cowboys games again but by then none of my old players I knew and loved on the Broncos were even playing anymore and it just wasn't any fun for me to watch anymore. I just started watching Dallas games too and I really like them now. I still root for the Broncos too but I'm more of a Dallas fan these days. All I had to do was watch a Dallas game occasionally but he never watched any other sports. It was WONDERFUL!!! The last several years he has decided he is a real die hard sports fan! He watches EVERY game of EVERY sport, college AND professional. He even watches games of teams he doesn't like. He's turned into ROB!!!We live with Brian's mom now. So does his brother, Chris. Chris has always watched sports like my brother Rob. That's all they ever watch I swear! SPORTS!!! CONSTANTLY!!! I don't know how much more of this I can bear. I know we have several t.v.'s in the house and I should just watch something but I also really like to spend time with Brian. So seriously though, what is up with watching every.single.game?!?! Including the ones of teams that you HATE?!!! UGGGHHH!!! I just had to get that off my chest!
~Did you know that if you buy a gun at Walmart you have to sign your whole life away, you have to do it between the hours of 9am and 7pm and have a background check, be there for 2 hours for the entire process (well in my case anyway) and it really, really bites?!!! Then once the torture is complete they make a manager walk you to your car with the gun to make sure that you don't give into your frustrations and go postal! If Brian ever wants another gun...I don't care if it's a gift or not...HE has to buy it HIMSELF!!! Oy vey!!!
~We made super cute ornaments today for the tree. Last year we did it too and it was so much fun and easy I decided to do it every year.
~I finally have all of my Christmas shopping done. Finished this morning. Yes it's Christmas Eve and I just finished today but Brian just got paid yesterday so I didn't have a choice.
~Brian's brother Joshua is home for Christmas!!! HOORAY!!! He's the baby of the family. We all adore Joshua! The adults and the kids! He's awesome and we are all so happy to have him around. He is such a nice, fun, happy guy and we miss him when he's away! So glad he gets to be here for 2 weeks!!!
~I finally watched It's A Wonderful Life the other day. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that show! It's one of my all time favorite movies! My mom and I are the only ones who like it in my family so we used to watch it together every year. Now I torture Brian and the kids with it. It's just so good I don't get how anyone wouldn't just love watching it year after year after year!!!
~I'm trying really hard to be happy and not feel sad about not seeing my family this year on Christmas. I'm trying not to think about my parents sitting at home on Christmas day all alone because we are all away. It's just been super sad for me this year for some reason. My brother Rob's birthday is on Christmas day and I always miss him lots that day and his beautiful family. I'm missing my sisters and their families and Nate and his family. I can't listen to I'll Be Home For Christmas without crying this year. I'm such a boob! I'm trying to not be bummed out so I can still make it super fun and happy for the kids. It's just hard because as adults we realize the joy for us comes from interacting with and enjoying time with the people in our lives that we love so much. I just hope all of my family members have a wonderful day and that they know how much I love each and every one of them!!! Merry Christmas to them and to all of you!! And happy birthday Robby!!!! (And happy birthday to my sister Katie's husband Chris who's birthday is also Christmas day!!! We love him too!!)

I posted some pics on Word From The Zoo today if you are invited to that blog check it out. If you aren't ask me for an invite!!

Random thoughts...

~You should always remember to pour your popcorn on a cookie sheet to let the unpopped kernels fall to the bottom and scoop the popped popcorn off and place in your bowl when making caramel corn. I hate biting into caramel corn and almost breaking my teeth on an unpopped kernel.
~Brian wants to get me an expensive present that we can't afford unless he calls it a Christmas/Birthday present since my birthday is in January. Part of me REALLY wants this expensive present but part of me hates to have one present. I mean really, you get 2 real gift getting days all year. Do you really want just one present...for the whole year? I'm still debating on that one. Usually we can't afford either but this year we can or it wouldn't even be an issue.
~Gracie is half crawling. She army crawls and real crawls sometimes. She is getting so big! She loves to play with her brother's cars and action figures and basically anything she can find to chew on. She has 2 teeth now. She is so happy and so pretty. She waves now. She is so much better at eating now which is nice. She is just pure joy!!!!
~Matthew is feeling so much better thank goodness!!!
~My teeth hurt any time I eat anything hot or especially cold. They have hurt for like a month and a half. I'm about to pull my teeth out by myself...anyone have a good set of plyers?!!!
~I MISS MY FAMILY!!! I've been married for 16 years now and we used to take turns spending Christmas with my family one year and Brian's the next until Zack was like 5 and we stopped. I wish we could be with my family this year. I'm especially lonely for them this year for some reason...
~Christmas time is so much fun!!! I just love it!!! It's almost over...
~Does anyone gave any good soup recipes to share? I just love soup this time of year!!! It's the best!!!
~I can't wait for New Year's Eve!! I just love it! We always have a fun little party and the kids just love it!
~Well, I hope everyone has a super fun Christmas!!! And the best New Year EVER!!!

Pneumonia......

Matthew couldn't breathe again when he woke up Friday morning. He puffed on the inhaler 3 times by 9:00 a.m. One time was after he had a fit because I wouldn't let him go to school. It was after all Hat Parade day and wear your p.j.'s to school day for kindergarten and Santa was coming to visit the kindergarten classes. He was NOT happy to be missing it all. When I was in the shower he came running in saying he couldn't breathe. He was panting and couldn't breathe enough to inhale the albuterol when I tried the inhaler on him so I took him to the emergency room. His oxygen level was 83 and they did a chest xray and discovered he has pneumonia. They gave him a breathing treatment and steroids and put him on oxygen and he still wasn't doing well so they admitted him to the hospital. This was the first time one of our children was hospitalized and it freaked us out but we are so grateful they took such great care of him! They gave him i.v. antibiotics and breathing treatments every 4 hours and steroids and he responded so well they let him come home Saturday morning. I was able to sleep in the room with him on my own bed so I could be close to him. My heart went out to those of you who have had children in the hospital for long periods of time. How scary it must have been and how difficult to watch your precious children suffer for so long. I am so grateful to live where we can just go right to the doctor or hospital when we or our children need treatment. Thank heavens for good doctors, attentive nurses, thoughtful volunteers, and friends and family to offer prayers. It has been a wonderful thing to live with Brian's mom and his brother Chris right now. They have helped us so much through swine flu, croop, other colds, and now Matthew's pneumonia and hospitalization. What a comfort it was to just be able to run him to the hospital and know that Gracie, Max, and Zack would be well taken care of!!! Matthew is doing so much better now and actually hated to leave the hospital. He enjoyed having his own t.v., making crafts with mom, having all of mom and dad's undivided attention, and being waited on hand and foot by us and the nurses. We're glad he can breathe again!!!! Breathing is good!!!!!!!!

Dear Santa,

Here is my Christmas list for this year.


~I would really, really appreciate it if I could not have to make dinner for the rest of the month. By dinner time I'm spent and the last thing I want to do is make dinner. I added crock pot meals to the menu thinking that would help the situation but I'm too busy (and lets face it, more than a little scatterbrained) to remember to actually put the food in the crock pot.
~Some cute "mom jeans". I like hip, and cool clothes but I have hips so it really hasn't been working for me. I also have a definite MOM belly after carrying 4 babies. I'm thinking if the jeans were designed really cute and fashionable on the bottom and a little like maternity jeans at the top but instead of being extra stretchy and low, the panel could be made from Spanks and go up extra high then they would be just about right for my body. That would be so great and Brian would especially love these since I wouldn't whine to him every.single.day about my stupid jeans.
~I would also appreciate having a computer that actually works ALL OF THE TIME!!!
~Oh, I was also thinking a lesbian life partner in addition to my husband would be nice. Not for the sex part of course but because I think it would be nice to have a partner that thinks like a woman, acts like a woman, and helps out like a woman. You know, someone that sees what needs to be done and just...does it! Without being asked!!! And when I have conversations with them they would actually respond in the right places instead of just not really saying much or trying to solve the problem they would actually nod, say I know!! or really? or you have GOT to be kidding me?! or NO WAY!!! or stuff that generally lets you know you are having a conversation with a real life person instead of the wall. Also, they would help out with the house work and put the clothes away after I fold them and hang them on hangers since I really hate doing that! They would make the menus, do the grocery shopping, run the kids lunches to school when I forget to send them, plan the budget and make sure I stick to it, pay the bills, make sure the cars are clean and maintained and all the stuff I'm not such a big fan of so I can just hold my baby and enjoy every moment of her babyhood!!! OOOO and I could actually scrapbook once in a while and read books and write and quilt and sew. She would also go shopping with me and tell me what looks cute and what looks like crap. That would be super!!!
~Also, if it wouldn't be too much to ask, I could really use a good vacation! Maybe two of them even. A super nice, romantic, relaxing vacation with my husband and a really super fun, kid friendly one with the whole family. It's been TOOOO long!!!!!

Thanks Santa! You're the greatest!!!
Love,
Tara
~

Too much fun!!!!!

This time of year is so much fun and so crazy! There just isn't time for a whole lot of cleaning!  I think I need a maid. Or at least a full weekend with nothing else to do but clean. That wouldn't be very fun of course. I guess we'll just be a mess until January........

My 2 favorite things....

Tonight I watched Julie and Julia. It is a combination of my two favorite forms of entertainment...blogging and cooking! It was very enjoyable! It is a true story about a woman that is feeling really lost and finds a way in her busy life to enjoy the love she has for writing by blogging. I can relate completely since as many of you know, I started this whole blogging thing during a melt down time in my life. I just didn't feel like my life had meaning or purpose beyond cooking, cleaning, laundry. UGH!!! I told Brian I felt like I had lost my joy.  I didn't know who I was anymore. I felt lost and confused and alone. Being a stay at home mom and wife is not very rewarding at times. Being a mom and wife in general isn't very rewarding at times. You work hard all day long and at the end of the day no one can tell what you did all day, including yourself, because it's all a mess again. It sometimes feels like you're trapped in the movie Groundhog Day. But if you know that is what you are meant to do it's a wonderful thing most of the time. I have my days of feeling really frustrated but most of the time I do love what I do and I wouldn't change it for anything. I just was in such a rut and don't know why but it really sucked and I haven't felt like that since. THANK HEAVENS!!! I think I just had to really evaluate myself and see if this is really what I wanted and needed to do. Once I knew the answer to that question it's been good and I have joy in what I do and realize it is what I WANT and NEED to do!! It's not for everyone but it's for me. Blogging kind of saved ME I guess. The me I couldn't find in the middle of my mom world. It helped me feel like I could do something for me and that was ok. I started out thinking it was a great way to keep family and friends updated on our lives since they don't all live close and don't get to see the kids. It turned into a hobby, passion, ADDICTION!!! I LOVE writing and have always dreamed of writing in some capacity and this is just kind of a fun outlet for that. It also is kind of a journal and that has been super great to go back and read old posts and feel so happy that I actually have a record of our life. It was also a connection to the outside world for me. I totally NEEDED that!!! And still do! Facebook has added to the fun of that of course but blogging is where it started for me. It also at times is kind of like a scrapbook for me without the huge mess for my kids to attack.
It turns out that very few family members are interested enough to ever read my blog and that's ok. It stopped being for that a long time ago. It's my silly, quirky little outlet and I know that many people just don't "get" it and that's ok too. For those of you who DO "get" it and read my blog...THANK YOU!!! I love knowing others like my blog! It makes me happy! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE getting comments from people. I was so sad when my blog was broken and I couldn't get comments.
I'm trying to be brave enough to actually write a fictional story. This particular story has been floating around in my thoughts for about a year now. I'll let you know if I do it. OOOO Scary and exciting all at once!

Let me just start out by saying &%^$ >?@!~&^%(*&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, now that that's out of my system I can go on.  Whew I needed that!!!!


Have you ever known anyone that never misses an opportunity for "I told you so"s and tries to always tear down everyone they ever come in contact with and brings everyone down that they interact with by digging at them and making them feel worse than they did when they ran into you? I know someone like that and I really hope and pray that I can be the complete opposite of that! That when I run into someone I can uplift them and make them feel better for having talked with me and spread a little sunshine around. I know that I'm not like that all the time and that life is hard and sometimes I ooze negativity too but I really don't mean to or want to and I hope I can be better. I know being torn down and brought down and stomped on by someone has a tendency to rub off on those around them and I really hope to rise above it and to be positive and good.
~I LOVE Christmas time! I love the snow, the music, the food, the smells, the lights, the ornaments, the trees, the wreathes, basically everything about it and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE being able to see it all through my little children's eyes! Makes it even more enjoyable!
~We went to my family Christmas party last Friday night. It was tons of fun! The kids made gingerbread houses out of graham crackers and the adults made real gingerbread houses. I was so going to try making my own this year but chickened out and bought one at the last minute for $10. Zack finished his and was moving it from the table and dropped it and all the candy fell off of it and it broke. Poor kid! We decided to let him decorate the one we had bought. He had fun and that's all that matters! This year the kids bought gifts for each other and the adults decided that instead of exchanging gifts this year we would play a white elephant game of sorts. It was actually bingo. Each adult purchased a $5-$10 gift to wrap and bring to the party. The gifts were placed in the middle of the table and each time someone got a bingo they were able to either pick a gift from the middle or trade with someone else if they wanted their gift. Once your bingo card was completetly full you could either open the gift in your hand or steal someone else's to open. It was so much fun!!! Brian ended up with an air soft bb gun and I had a nice bottle of bath and body works lotion and a Christmas towel with a snowman on it. So cute! It was a really fun night!!!
~I finally made pumpkin bars. Now moving on to all of my favorite fattening Christmas goodies! HOORAY!!!
~All of our kids and Brian have had a cold. Matthew hadn't had it yet but started to cough a little here and there on Sunday and I thought for sure he was starting the cold too. That night he was eating some chicken noodle soup for dinner and started having problems breathing. I thought he was having an asthma attack and had Brian give him a puff of albuterol from the inhaler. Well, he just got worse. Brian gave him benedryl. He still didn't improve. I was wondering if it was asthma or if he had accidentally been exposed to nuts or something. He said he didn't breathe the inhaler very well so I decided to give him the liquid albuterol he had left after the swine flu. He got so bad he was not able to catch his breath. I thought I should call 911 but we live really close to the hospital and decided it would be faster to drive him. I was afraid by the time we got to the hospital he wouldn't be breathing at all he was so bad! I expected him to pass out any time. As all of this was running through my mind Brian suggested we use the epipen. Now any of you who know Brian know he doesn't get upset or excited about ANYTHING! If HE is suggesting this it's BAD!!! So I held him down and Brian gave him the shot. Matthew really was very brave through the whole thing I might add! He started breathing better and we took him to the hospital. Once we were there he started doing the barky cough of croup. Matthew had chronic croup from the age of one to about 3 or 4 but hasn't had it for a couple of years. Max has had it a few times and so did Zack when he was a baby. I KNOW what croup sounds like and trust me the kid was not showing signs of croup until we were at the hospital. With croup if you have them in the cold air or if they are drinking ice water or something the restriction in their air way improves and they can breathe better. We wonder if the warm soup made his air way constrict and that's was the problem. We don't know! We do know however that albuterol makes croup worse so the double dose of albuterol didn't help him out at all. Thank heavens we have an epi pen!! Anyway, that was too much excitement for me and I hope I never have to watch him struggle that hard to breathe ever again. SCARY!!! That's the second time in his life he's been that bad and I hope it doesn't happen again!
~Our computer is broken again and I have to share again that is why I don't post very often. Brian is hoping to fix it tonight. Cross your fingers for me please!!! 
~I totally love the setting on blogs that makes it so you are notified of comments made on your blog by email!!! It's the best! BTW: My spell check option is gone on my blog so please don't critique too much. I have been typing with a very chatty 3 year old talking to me and a very squirmy 6 month old on my lap.
~I hope you all are enjoying this fun Christmas time!!! Happy celebrating!!!

Randomness is back in business!!! HOORAY!!!

I'm so excited I just can't stand it! My blog actually updates and keeps comments for the first time in a few weeks!! LOVE IT!!

A little randomness is in order!!! Ok...First thing. Brian thinks it's best to have one really super great gift for Christmas. One big, expensive present to open. I am totally the opposite. I want QUANTITY!!! I have a million little things I would love to have but never spend money on and I want a whole bunch of those things to open up on Christmas morning. He gives me 1 or 2 gifts to open and I usually give him a whole bunch of things to open. I think that while we are both thankful for our gifts we are honestly a little disappointed on Christmas morning. There have been years we haven't had anything under the tree for each other or we would spend $10-$20 each. I would totally think I was cool with it until Christmas morning came around and I'll admit, it was pretty disappointing to not have a single thing under the tree with my name on it. I know that's probably kind of selfish but I can't help it. I would have been totally cool with 10 things from the dollar store wrapped and placed under the tree but Brian would have thought that was at least as bad if not worse than having nothing under the tree. I have always thought it was the difference between our sexes. Boys want big, expensive gifts PERIOD!!! Is there anything under like $200 thats really going to thrill them? I'm thinking not!! Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm the only one that thinks it would be fun to have a whole bunch of inexpensive things under the tree instead of 1 gift. My idea of the perfect Christmas morning would be to have maybe a new bottle of pretty fingernail polish, a little fun scrapbooking packet (even though I never actually scrapbook anymore they are only 5 bucks at WalMart and so fun and cute!!!), a new shirt, a movie or cd I like, a book to read, maybe a necklace or some other piece of costume jewelry (has to be costume!!! I lose everything! AND I don't think I'd feel too comfortable having Gracie suck on a really expensive piece of jewelry but if she wants to slobber all over a $5-$10 piece I'm cool with that), a bottle of Pear Berry or Country Apple lotion from Bath and Body, a fun pair of slippers or slipper socks, a fun kitchen gadget, a new Willow statue to add to my very small collection, I could think of a zillion things like that that would be so super fun to have. So now I'm curious! What do you think? Is it better to have a bunch of gifts to open or 1 super fun, expensive gift? Please comment and even if I don't know you comment anyway!!! I'd love to hear what you all think! 

My boys are obsessed lately with trying to find their six pack stomachs in the mirror! So cute!!!

Gracie is army crawling, sitting up, and ate her first veggies last night. I was going to start with green beans but I felt that would be cruel (I think green beans are vile anyway but some how they found a way to make baby food green beans even worse) so I gave her peas instead. She gagged a few times but ate half a jar so that was a good start. Brian hates peas so he says he doesn't blame her for gagging. We always have both on the table and we did a great job of hiding our dislike of them from Zack until he was 5 years old. Pretty good!

I can't wait to start eating all of the Christmas goodies this year! I still haven't had pumpkin bars yet though, which is an absolute must for me at Thanksgiving so I have to make those first before I can start making Christmas treats.

We strung popcorn for the tree again this year. We did this 6 years ago. It took me a minute to remember why it took me 6 years to want to do it again. It looks so pretty but holy tediousness!!! And THEN I noticed yesterday that my strands were looking sparce in certain areas and found out Zack had been eating the popcorn off of the tree. I let him know we don't do that and that we have plenty of other popcorn to eat and it's actually salted and buttered. It took me hours to string that stuff! Seriously!!!

My mom, my 3 sisters, my sister-in-law, Heidi, my 2 neices, my nephew's girlfriend, and I went to New Moon together Friday morning. It was fun to go with them! I think we should have a girl's night out more often! I would drive the hour for that!! I liked New Moon so much more than I liked Twilight! JACOB!!! HELLLLOOOO!!! Oh to be 17 again and injured near Jacob so he could give me his shirt to soak up the blood. hhhmmmm  Good times!!! I know I'm like really old but he still looked HOT!!! My cousin thinks that makes me a pedafile. I just think it makes me a person with eyes that work!!!

I finally bought a new skirt! HOORAY FOR ME!!! It's been years!!! I told Brian when I was pregnant with Gracie that I was getting a new skirt to wear at the baby blessing because I am sick of wearing the same thing week after week, year after year!!! Well, he lost his job so that didn't happen. I was at the mall and decided just to look in Downeast Outfitters for a sec.  They had the cutest black and white skirt with a little red line in it. My FAVORITE color combination!!! I couldn't resist!!! It was so nice to actually have something cute to wear to church for a change!!!

Our Thanksgiving was really nice! The food was absolutely delicious! My mom is such a fantastic cook and my sisters and sister in law all pitched in wonderful stuff too! I, however, don't have my own kitchen right now and found it difficult to squeeze into my mom's or Brian's mom's the day before Thanksgiving so I took a store bought cheese ball and crackers and some soda pop. Gracie woke up for a bottle at 5:20 a.m., Matthew was having an asthma attack and needed a puff off of the inhaler and some Benedryl, and Max vomited a few minutes later all over my sister's bathroom floor but after that was all cleaned up it was a fun day. He had had greasy, spicy pizza the night before so at least it wasn't a virus that spread through everyone or anything. My friend Melissa was in Utah for Thanksgiving. It was her daughter's year to spend Thanksgiving with her dad so she brought her to him. My mom let me bring Melissa to spend Thanksgiving with our family. It was so fun to see her and to catch up on each other's lives a little bit. She looks fantastic and is so happy! I hope all of you had a wonderful holiday, too!

Flashback Blog Post From Last Year

Oy Vey!!!!


So 2 Christmas' ago I thought it would be SOOO much fun to send a picture of the boys out with our Christmas cards. Trying to get all of the boys smiling and looking in the same direction at the same time turned out to be the impossible dream. Brian was a ward clerk and was at tithing settlement that night so I was on my own and poor Zack had a broken arm (notice the red cast)and had to hold Max who was known to fling all of his body weight in any direction at any given moment. Matthew kept jumping and putting his arm up in the air every time I said to say cheese and would totally mess up the positon I had them in. There were tears. Some were mine some were theirs. When I was looking for a fun Christmas picture to put on my blog I ran across the sequence of pictures I took. I died laughing. NOW I can laugh! I just had to share! I'm hoping it gives you as much of a laugh as it gave me. We did get a few cute ones. It was a Christmas MIRACLE! I haven't done it since. I just don't have the energy.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

MY BLOG HATES ME!!!

For some reason my posts aren't posting. Please check my blog archive and click on the new post to read. I hope I can figure this out!!! Thanks!!

I am thankful for Spencer Roundy!!!!!

In 1994 Brian and I had been married for a year and we lived in an apartment in my parent's neighborhood. We went to the same church building they did and taught primary. One of the adorable little children in the primary was Spencer Roundy. He was diagnosed with brain cancer. He fought a good fight! He was so sweet and smiley and everyone just loved him and rooted for him and prayed and fasted for him. He fought the cancer for 6 years. He passed away in November 2000 at the age of 10. He was such a thoughtful and sweet boy! He was given an assignment in class not long before he passed away to write down 3 wishes. Now this is a boy who has struggled with this illness for 6 years. Basically he wrote that he wanted to be like Santa and give presents to children and help give clothes to children who needed them. How sweet!!! He was a fan of the Utah Jazz and had had the opportunity to meet the Jazz Bear mascot who loved Spencer. A year after his death Bear hosted a party where he brought $7500.00 in donations for children in the area. He committed to continue coming here every Christmas as long as the family collected the donations. They call it Spencer's Wishes. Every year they collect and every year he comes! Many children have been blessed by this great family, Spencer, and Bear. My brother, Nathan is good friends with Spencer's older brother Jason and has participated in this special day several times. I was lucky enough to be at WalMart a few years ago when the buses pulled up with the children in them who were there to get gifts. They were able to pick anything they wanted with the money they were given. Toys, clothes, music, movies, games. Whatever they needed and wanted. I think they get $100 per child. It was a beautiful experience seeing the joy on all of these sweet children's faces as they were able to benefit from the kindness of strangers who CARE!!! I marvel at the family's ability to take such an incredibly sad and difficult experience and bring something so amazing out of it!!! When we moved back into the neighborhood several years later I was in a church class of women that Spencer's mother taught. The topic she had been asked to teach about was grieving. I'm sure that was not easy for her but I will always be grateful for her willingness to share her experiences and to feel the spirit in the room so very strongly because of the sacredness of what she was sharing about her experiences with Spencer, her angel boy as he struggled to fight for so long. I live in the same town again but a different neighborhood and I am so touched by the love the community still has for Spencer, his family, and Spencer's Wishes. When I was getting new tires I saw a jar on the counter collecting for Spencer's Wishes and I unloaded what little I had in my wallet. Who could pass up such an amazing thing as Spencer's Wishes! There was a radio-thon on the local radio station the other day raising money and on Spencer's Wishes facebook his mom said they were able to raise $18,000!!! AWESOME!!! Think of all they can do for children with that! I LOVE IT!!! When I think of Spencer and Spencer's Wishes I instantly have a reverent, respectful feeling come over me. I just love what they do and love that such an amazing little boy that touched so many lives in his 10 years on this earth continues to touch so many lives! I know it makes him smile!!! If you are interested in donating or reading more about Spencer's Wishes visit http://www.spencerswishes.org/ They also donate hand made and store bought pj's to Ronald McDonald house in Provo, Utah. A blanket is sent home to a child on their first visit and the Roundy's wanted to make sure they have pj's too. They also donate pj's to children in safe houses. How sweet!!! I have been thinking about Spencer and Spencer's Wishes so much lately I just wanted to share!!!

Today I am thankful for.....

being able to RAMBLE!!!!!
~Max is 3 years old and weighs 38 lbs. I'm wondering if it would be ok if I stuffed 2 lbs of rocks in his pockets so he can weigh 40 lbs. and start sitting in a booster in the car. Not a fan of car seats! I'm a fan of the safety aspect of course but not of the constant buckling and unbuckling. I know it sounds so lazy of me but some of my happiest moments have come on the days my children start sitting in a booster and we can ditch the car seat. Even better was the day we got rid of Zack's booster and he could just sit in his normal seat...buckled normally...ALL...BY...HIMSELF!!!! Max has a new puffy winter coat which adds some fun to the whole experience!!
~I LOVE Pandora!!! If you haven't experienced the joy of Pandora and you live in a small town that has THE WORST radio stations EVER then you will truly LOVE Pandora!!! Also, if your computer has crashed and lost all of the hundreds of Cd's you copied to your computer and all of the songs you have purchased on itunes over the years...you will LOVE Pandora even more!!! If you don't know what I'm talking about go to pandora.com. It's called Pandora Radio. It's so cool!! You register your information so they can save the stations you pick. It's totally FREE!!! The way you get started is you just type in your favorite singer or song and then a box will pop up with a song on it that they think you would also like based on your choice. The song will play. You either 'thumbs up' or 'thumbs down it'. If you 'thumbs up' it it will keep going in that direction of music. If you 'thumbs down it' it tries a new song. It saves your 'stations' you set up and each time you return to pandora.com you just pick a station it has saved for you or you can always at any time create a new station without any problem. If you're listening to country and you decide you are in an Elvis mood..go for it! That's a fun choice by the way! Or if you want Van Halen type stuff , Frank Sinatra, or just really...anything, it will do whatever you want! It's like having an ipod or a super great mixed tape or something! I LOVE it!!! It's my new favorite thing!!!
~So, I love to cook! I'm not a huge baker! That was always my big sister Dana's forte. She always enjoyed making cookies and other yummy stuff and I enjoyed eating them so it worked out really well for me. Then later my little sisters Stephanie and Katie would bake cookies a lot and once again it was just a super great deal for me. Also my mom is such an amazing cook and baker and everything she makes is absolutely delicious so I, in some way or another had plenty of great treats without actually making them on my own. One time in high school I tried making my own brownies from scratch and forgot to put FLOUR in them. NOT GOOD!!! Then I married Brian and he is a wonderful cook as well and a great baker too! The poor man ate the meals I made for him when we were first married! He deserves some kind of great prize for that I tell ya! People would always ask at his family gatherings and especially at my family gatherings if I made what we brought or if Brian did. They wanted fair warning and I can't blame them! He makes my mom's rolls so well that his own family has asked him on many occasions to bring the rolls for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or what ever gathering rolls would be good at. He makes delicious bread and all sorts of yummy treats. Once again...why bother baking when it is done so well for you?! Well, now that Brian has been working and is not a student anymore and life is busier and crazier he doesn't really have time for baking treats or making dinner very much so I have had to step up to the plate. I actually cook pretty well and I enjoy cooking meals and finding new yummy, easy, fast recipes to make. I have learned some very important things over the years. #1 rule: Turns out 'high' isn't always the best temperature to cook stuff on. #2 rule: To be a good cook you must have PATIENCE!!! I was not born with this virtue for sure!! But it's true...if you cook some things longer they actually taste better! I want my food FAST so it has taken me a long time to get used to this but I must say I think I'm pretty good at it now! I have even started baking the last few years a lot more than ever before. One reason is that since Matthew is deathly allergic to all nuts I read labels....a lot!!! Have you ever taken the time to really read labels on your food? It's a little scary what they are putting in our food to preserve it! So between wanting to not hurt my son and wanting to control the ingredients I put in my families bodies I have baked a lot more goodies the last few years. I'm ok at it. I still don't make breads or rolls. Oh, Rhodes bread and rolls...SURE! Although occasionally I will make my sister-in-law Stephanie's delicious bread sticks. They are so easy I can even make them. They only take like 45 minutes start to finish. There's no kneading required!!!! You just mix the ingredients, let it set for 20 minutes and bake them for 20 minutes and that's it. If you start them when you start dinner they are done when dinner is done. Very versatile recipe too. You can make them as rolls or bread sticks. You can make them all Italianed up or just buttery or for a really super yummy treat slather them in butter and put a layer of brown sugar over that and then sprinkle withe cinnamon before you bake them. Put your favorite cinnamon roll glaze or frosting over them and you have cinnamon rollish deliciousness. I think I'll post the recipe on my recipe blog. (top right corner if you want it) Anyhoo, one super great thing that has been happening lately is that my 10 year old LOVES to cook! I won't let him mess with the stove much but I totally let him make stuff to bake. Brian or I just do the oven part. His specialty is brownies. MY FAVORITE!!! How lucky am I?!
~By the way...dark hunter green carpet totally bites!!! It is all over the basement we are living in and holy cow is it hard to keep clean. And the really short nap of it makes it even more difficult to vacuum. I used to think wood chips were so NOT cool!! I mean I would find them EVERYWHERE!! It was like my son would come home from school with them stuffed in his pockets and sprinkle them at random all around the house. Well, I had NO IDEA what I was talking about!!! Wood chips are downright DREAMY compared to SAND!!!!!!! My kids attend a school with sand instead of wood chips and HOLY COW!!! I can't get the junk to vacuum up off of this carpet to save my life! I even tried Brian's mom's Elecrolux and it didn't do any better than my $38 special!
~I've been trying to be all positive and think of all my blessings this month and have been writing what I'm thankful for on facebook and on my blog. I am SO grateful for my blessings but sometimes a girl just has to ramble a little!! Today, I am grateful that I can ramble and you'll read my ramblings!!! Thank YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I put more cute Gracie pics on my other blog today.

I am thankful that.......

it's 8:00 p.m. and time for my kids to go to bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's been one of those days for sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am thankful for.....AMAZING WOMEN!!!!!
Let me tell you about a few of them.

My sister-in-law Jenise: She is truly amazing! She is one of the nicest people you will ever meet in your life. When her 2 children were little her husband and I believe 2 of his brothers passed away in an accident on a farm in Kansas. She has done a wonderful job of raising her children!!! She met and married my brother, Rob, several years ago and they are very happy together. She ADORES her children and they ADORE her right back! Rob loves her children like they are his own! David is her youngest at 23 years old and he is a great kid! He was in a very serious car accident in February of this year. The accident has left him paralyzed. He is working very hard to regain his strength and his ability to walk again. He is a strong man! His accident happened in Texas and his parents live in Kansas. It was something like 12 long hours before they even knew that it had happened. SO scary! Jenise has been through so much this year watching her son go through all he has. She is strong and faithful. I know it's been so hard for her! I wish we could make it all better for them!!! She is her children's biggest cheerleader! David, Erin, and Rob's Tyler are so lucky to have her! She is a wonderful example to all of us and I am so glad my brother was lucky enough to find her! Her daughter Erin made her a grandma this year! Sweet little Noah was born in July and I'm sure has brought much joy to their lives! Isn't it wonderful how even when you are facing the most difficult challenges a precious baby can make you smile, laugh, and be happy!!! What a precious gift!!!

My cousin John's wife, Renee: Renee has 5 beautiful children. 2 of these children are twins. An adorable little boy named Parker and a beautiful little girl named Penelope. In February, Parker who was 8 months old at the time came down with bacterial meningitis in his brain. Renee and John went through pure hell over and over watching their tiny son struggle to survive this awful illness. He made it through. He has some permanent things he'll deal with like his loss of hearing. Some things will take time to heal or recover from. I have read their blog that talks about the different challenges and things that they have faced and over come and still face. These are amazing people! As I read a recent post that Renee made I shed many tears as she opened up about many of the emotions she has had over the months since Parker's challenge began. She is an amazing woman! She is an inspiration to everyone! As she struggles to find joy in her trial and be strong through it she strengthens everyone around her. I wish I could find a way to be a strength to them but instead they are strengthening me. My testimony, my faith, my attitude is all strengthened by them. Parker, John, and their sweet little girls are lucky to have such a wonderful woman in their lives! Once again I wish we could make it all better for them! Such a sweet mother! Such an amazing woman!!!

My friend Sarah: Sarah has 4 children and is an amazing woman! She is the best mom! It's so fun to be around her! We laugh until we cry when we are together! She Is funny, and so great with her children! Her husband, Jared's brother passed away this summer. His brother's wife had just passed away in December of the year before. This left their 4 children without either parent. Sarah and Jared didn't even blink! They took these 4 children in and added them to their family and are doing a great job of it! I can't think of a better family for them to go to. They will give them love and care and that is the most important thing they can have! What an amazing woman! I know it hasn't always been the easiest thing and I'm sure it's pretty crazy some times but I also know that Sarah wouldn't have it any other way! She is such an inspiration and example to me and I am so glad to call her friend!

My friend Melissa: Melissa is a single mother of the cutest little girl named Jessica. They were our neighbors for a while. I feel like Heavenly Father helped us find each other when we really needed a friend. Melissa is a very strong, talented, beautiful, amazing woman. She was in an abusive marriage and she had the strength to leave. THAT is amazing!!! I know that it wasn't easy for the abuse she suffered was mental abuse. It may not leave scars to the naked eye but they are there. I know it hasn't been easy but I know it is worth it! She is a beautiful woman inside and out and she didn't allow that to be taken away. She is a daughter of God and she deserves to be treated as such and I am proud of her for being strong enough to leave a bad situation! I am so glad to know her!!!

I could go on and on because I know so many inspirational women! My mother, my sisters, my sister in laws, my cousins, my friends, my mother in law...I am lucky to know them and to be able to learn from all of them and to gain strength from their examples. The particular women I have chosen are women who have faced especially difficult challenges this year and are doing their best to rise above them! You never know who is watching you and learning from you! Every woman effects every other woman around them and I am grateful to know so many wonderful women!!!!

I am thankful for.....

millions of dollars.
My hundreds of pairs of shoes.
The ability to buy anything I want whenever I want.
My 7 bedroom house with the huge, gorgeous kitchen.
My gigantic family room where we can have the best parties and family gatherings.
My huge, super fun property that allows the kids to run free and explore.
My daughters beautiful wardrobe!
My son's adorable clothes and totally awesome toys.
Our 4 wheelers.
Brian's motorcycle.
Our camp trailer.
Our ability to jet set around the world to Disneyland, Disney World, Italy, France, Germany, Australia, New York City...........
The wardrobes we buy for all of our friends and family who need them.
The Christmas' we are able to provide for everyone we know who can't really afford it.
The hundreds of people we are able to help on those little Angel Trees at Christmas time.
Brian's studly truck he's always dreamed of having.
My Jeep Wrangler I've always dreamed of having.
I'm thankful for my dreams since that is where we actually are able to do all of this stuff!!! Maybe some day we'll be able to do some of those things but for now I guess we will just be grateful for the things we do have! I know we are even better off than a lot of people and we are truly grateful for that! We always want more than we have but when we lose what we have we realize we really are blessed and it can always be worse!!!

I am thankful for....

~Doritos
~Dr. Pepper
~Cherry Coke
~Snow
~My children
~Brian
~To be able to look in the little girl's section at the store without hearing grumbles from Brian about how we don't have one of those so we can't look.
~Brian's job
~My parents
~My sisters
~My brothers
~Brian's family
~My friends
~Mixed Nuts the movie! LOVE it!!!!
~The Food Network
~The way my little boys smell like puppies after they play outside.
~The way Gracie smells after a bath and a slathering of baby lotion.
~The smell of bread dough rising and baking. (I don't actually know that from experience with baking it myself just from letting the Rhode's Rolls rise and thaw)
~The way the bathroom smells when I go in there after Brian has showered and gone to work. It's fun to smell his aftershave and body wash in the air.
~The way my neice Haley adores my little Gracie! Gracie loves her right back! It's the sweetest thing!
~How nice it is to have the internet again.
~Dots and popcorn at the movie theater.
~Thanksgiving dinner
~Christmas time!!!!!!!!!!!!!



BTW: I added some pics on my Word from the zoo blog if y'all are interested. If you want to be invited to that blog let me know and I'll send you an invite!

Today I'm thankful for....

the sweetest, cutest baby in the whole world! I'm not just saying that because I'm her mother! It's pure truth!!! If you don't believe me just ask her dad or her brothers!! They'll tell you the same thing! Here are a couple of my favorite pictures of her. She's 5 months old now and has changed so much. I just can't believe how time flies!

Just recycle it?

So my friend posted about her love of Christmas and it got me in the spirit and I started wondering what my old posts were like on my private blog last year. I checked them out and I liked them so much I was thinking of just recycling them this year instead of trying to think of new ones for this year. My favorite is the flashback of the nightmare experience I had trying to take a decent picture of my little boys for our Christmas card one year. Oy vey!!! Anyhoo, maybe I'll just go green for Christmas this year.....

I am thankful for.....

being able to hang out with my mom yesterday. Max, Gracie, and I drove up there yesterday to spend some time with her and it was a great day! Bonus: I scored warm, winter coats for Max and Matty for $25.00 at Penneys. Love a great deal! I'm so relieved to not have to worry about Matty freezing at the bus stop! :)



Max's coat:

Matthew's coat:

I've got the time change blues!!!

WARNING: This was written during the 5 a.m. hour so it may not be interesting or coherent! Good luck!

~I used to wake up at 5:30 a.m. For a while Gracie was waking up for a bottle at that time and then going right back to sleep until between 8 and 9. She would have been asleep since between 8 and 10 the night before so I was cool with getting up at 5:30 to feed her. Well, my body has a stupid natural alarm and after I repeatedly wake up at a certain time more than like 4 times my body just automatically adopts this new time to wake up. It sucked because I would fall asleep occasionally (usually I just never fell back to sleep) and wake up at 6:30 when the alarm went off so I could get the kids ready for the bus by 7:30. Well, ever since the lovely time change I wake up at 4:30. 4:30!!! I am not nice unless I get plenty of sleep and this is not my idea of plenty of sleep! Once I wake up I can't fall back to sleep because my mind thinks of all the things I need to do and stuff. RRRRGGGG!!!
~LOVE the Ped Egg!! You know that little thing they advertise to scrape the skin off of your feet. A friend on facebook posted about how much she likes it so I decided to test it out. When your husband refers to your feet as "hooves" you know you have a problem!!! It works wonders! It's super great and if you have "hooves" too, I highly recommend you try it!!!
~Not a big fan of spider rings and fake spiders in general because of my hatred of spiders. I have to say that living in a basement with really dark green carpet that's almost black where TONS of spiders live makes me dislike them even more!!!! YUCK!!! I don't get why boys like them so much either! NASTY!!!
~Max is so stinking cute! He LOVES preschool! He is at that funny stage that all my boys have gone through where they make up their own truth. They have crazy imaginations and just say the most hilarious things at this stage. I just pray that people don't believe what they say because who knows what they'd think was going on at our house! One day he told me that his teacher made him a birthday cake that day at school. One day I wanted him to wear these red work out pant kind of things that are way cute with navy blue and white stripes down the side of the leg. He tells me his teacher says he can't wear those pants to preschool. He HATES wearing coats in the winter so the other day he told me that his teacher says he doesn't have to wear a coat. The other day we were at his dad's office (he has been going to work an hour early and working through lunch to make up for time he missed when he had the swine flu and we've been taking lunch to him) and it was time to take him to preschool. I said, "Oh, Maxers we forgot to comb your hair today." He said, "That's ok my teacher says we don't have to comb our hair." He's just silly! I was reading some old posts the other day on my other blog and laughed again when I read about him telling me when I made tuna casserole or tuna surprise as Brian calls it that, "the tuna people told me that I can't eat tuna in my macaroni." Cracked me up!
~I keep reminding myself that it's ok that everyone drives like 5 miles an hour here because it's a small town and I'll probably still make it to my destination on time since it's not that far anyway. It helps me not want to pull my hair out every time I drive down the road. Remember we moved from a town that was in a county where we drove on the crazy interstate all the time and in busy towns and my car just doesn't know how to drive 5 miles an hour!!!
~We start watching Christmas movies at our house at the beginning of November. This year I HAD to watch Mixed Nuts in October. It makes me laugh! Such a bizarrely funny show! I'm curious if that Jim Carrey's Christmas Carol is good and if it's ok to take my boys to. Please let me know what you think if you see it!
~Well, I suppose I've rambled enough! I think I'll go tend my farm. It's SO much fun! I used to love to farm on facebook and then I decided it just took WAY too much time! I haven't farmed in months. I decided to try it again now that we have internet again and I used to enjoy farming while feeding bottles to Gracie and WOW they've changed it! It's super fast and easy and you get awesome tractors and stuff. Since people aren't blogging so much anymore I get bored and I was even thinking the other day that I wished it took a little longer on my farm because I didn't have anything else to do. Well, that's when I decided to finally cash in on all my Farkle chips people have been sending me and now I have a new addiction!!! My goal is to kick Brian's trash!!! Since Gracie sleeps so many hours during the night she eats every 2 hours during the day! That's a lot of farming I get to do!

I Am Thankful For.....

Today I am thankful for healthy children. This last year has been really tough on some of our family members. My nephew, David, was in a serious car accident in February and was paralyzed. He is making slow progress and has been blessed in many ways but he is facing a very difficult battle. My cousin's little baby boy, Parker, had bacterial menengitis in his brain in February also. He is improving and has been blessed in many ways as well but again the battle is slow and difficult. Both Parker and David have had many ups and downs these past few months. Their parents and they have suffered so much in every way and it's been really hard to know that they are suffering and there isn't anything we can do to help but to pray. Another of my cousins was just diagnosed with a brain tumor. They say it isn't cancerous but it is difficult to get to the tumor to remove it and his inner ear will have to be removed to do so. He is a husband and father and it's just scary! His surgery is tomorrow and we are praying he will be ok. After having the kids just have swine flu and worrying about their health because of everything you hear about it on the news and everything it makes you stop and think. I'm so grateful to have a healthy family. I think we tend to take that blessing for granted until we don't have it and then we realize how blessed we really, truly were. I am so grateful that I am healthy, that my husband is healthy, that my children are healthy!!! Truly a wonderful blessing!!!

I am thankful for........

It was strangely easy for me to think of my many blessings a few months ago when Brian was out of work. It was definitely a trial but we were truly blessed and it was nice to be constantly reminded of just how blessed. Moving from our old WONDERFUL place has been really hard! On all of us! We're slowly making the adjustments but some are coming along slower than others. I was really depressed for a few days and just couldn't get out of it and then I read a friends blog where she was talking about her blessings and it made me think that I should really start focusing more on the good in my life than on what I don't have. I LOVE blogging for that! As I say, one blogger's post can be another blogger's "lesson of the day". Well, I was thinking about it and last year I did kind of a thankful journal on my other blog during the month of November. I'm doing it again and this will be my first post. Some will be sappy, some will be silly.

I am thankful for....the most beautiful November EVER!!! Can you believe how wonderful it's been? I seriously can't remember the last time we had a Fall. It seems it always goes from being super hot to being super cold with no real 'in between'. I couldn't ask for a more beautiful Fall than this years! Every day the weather is PERFECT!!! We're a week into November and I'm still wearing short sleeves. How great is that?!!! LOVE it!!!
~I am thankful Brian and I were able to go on a date last night too! Thank goodness for my mother in law and Brian's brother Chris who watched my kids! Chris even walked with my spoiled little baby Gracie for like an hour because every time he sat down she cried. We are stuck together like glue, my little Gracie and I. I've never had a baby that was THAT attached. I am LOVING it! Unless of course I need to actually get something done and she won't let me put her down and then that's a real problem but other than that it's enjoyable! She is already scooting around on the floor and I have to make sure all the Lego's are put up because she finds them so I keep thinking this precious time of having her want me and only me all day long is so fleeting and I want to enjoy it instead of thinking it's a pain. Pretty soon she'll be walking and busy and I'll only be able to hold really hold her when she's sleeping. Matthew and Zack were quite attached to me too but Gracie is like nothing I've experienced. It's pretty great to be so loved I must say! I hope I never forget the way she looks at me. The way she lights up when I walk in the room. The look of utter adoration she gives me. Oh how I love her! There is truly no greater gift on this earth than to love and be loved by my precious children! It was really hard for me to leave her. We even took her with us to dinner then dropped her off for the movie. I am so glad that Chris took such great care of her! I can't tell you the last time Brian and I went on a date. And completely alone for part of it! WOW!!! That's simply unheard of! It was great! We had Sticky Finger Salads at Wingers...our favorite!! Crave 'em! Love 'em! Especially with extra ranch! MMMMM...MMMMM....GOOOOOD!!! Then we watched Couple's Retreat. We laughed a lot! It was really fun spending time alone with my sweetie. We needed it and we really need to do it more often!

I'm a SPAZ!!! What can I say?!

Last night I sat up in bed and shouted, "Who played the mother of Karen Irvine?" My mother's name is Karen Irvine. How silly is that?! I have been known to scream in my sleep and I've sworn in my sleep more than once, but I just wonder what the heck I was dreaming to provoke such a response. Of course I woke up my sweet little sleeping princess and had to feed her a bottle to calm her down. Brian said,"To answer your question, Hazel Depperschmidt played the mother of Karen Irvine." I'm sure he was annoyed by my outburst but probably more than just a little relieved to not be awakened by a blood curdling scream!! This has happened more than once, unfortunately. One time was especially embarrassing. Not very long after we were married we visited his mom and were sleeping in a room her old house that was pitch black. Not a single window. I started screaming and his brother Michael threw open the door and flipped on the light and looked at us like "what the h*$%" and Brian just said,"It's ok, she does this a lot." He just looked at us like we were nuts and went back to bed. I still haven't lived that one down. Another humiliating time was when we were living in this town we live in now in a house that was split right down the middle into two apartments. The mother of a friend of mine from high school named Andrew lived in the other apartment. There was a shared unfinished basement for storage and an enclosed back porch where we shared a large laundry room. Well, one night we watched Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom right before bed. I was dreaming that I was the lady in a chase scene in a market place and that I was just about to be caught. I started screaming! Brian put his arm around my waist to try to calm me down and said it was ok. I thought he was a bad guy catching me and I screamed even louder!! (My throat hurt so bad I was afraid I had permanently damaged it or something) Poor Andrew had been sleeping on a cot in the basement that night and thought I was being murdered or something and ran up the stairs and sat on the top stair until he was sure I wasn't dead and then ran back downstairs. I was MORTIFIED!!! Another night I swore like a sailor. I admit to struggling to control my language. I say the 'S' word, the 'D' word, and the 'H' word a lot. I try to be better at controlling it with the kids around but if I'm extra stressed or tired I have a much harder time. I used to say SOB a lot! Now I say son of a FREAK!!! I don't know why but that keeps me from saying the 'B' word so whatever. Of course I still think it and I would really like to be able to control my thoughts because if I swore out loud nearly as much as I swear in my head it would definitely not be pretty! For about the last year or 2 I find myself wanting to say JA a lot!!! I mean A LOT!!! I started saying JA instead of actually saying the words so that my 3 year old won't repeat it but people just make fun of me. I do NOT however say the 'F' word!!!!!!! But one night I sat up in bed and yelled out F-You (only I actually said the word) I mean, thank you! What?! What a goof! I often sit up in bed and just yell out the 'S' word or other swear words like I'm frightened or something. Brian has affectionately referred to my outbursts as my turrets ever since because he heard once that some people with turrets randomly yell out swear words. :P Between my craziness in my sleep and Brian's snoring, it's a miracle we ever get any sleep! Maybe that whole don't sleep together before you're married thing is overrated. Jk

Check out my Word From The Zoo blog for some Halloween pics!! I FINALLY updated!

Don't you just love it?!

The only thing that's more rewarding in my life than doing oodles and oodles of laundry...every...single...day...is having to re-do all of the laundry!!! 2 weeks ago I washed a green crayon with white clothes that ruined several pairs of my quite expensive underwear that is made with weird but nice fabric that holds onto green crayon for dear life! Then, because that wasn't enough fun, a few days later, I washed a tube of chapstick that my 9 year old left in his pocket and stained several pieces of clothing. I still need to get that out! Any suggestions? Last night I decided my life is just way too dull and I just needed something else to do, so I washed a piece of bubble gum with a load of our dark clothes. Brian was nice enough to get it out of the dryer with a magic eraser. Now, I guess I'm going to have to break down and get that AND the chapstick out of all our clothes. I'm so excited! I just can't wait! I can't think of one other thing in the whole entire world that I would rather do than this fabulous task!!! So super excited!!! :(

I charged my camera battery and took some pics of the yummy caramel apples I made. My friend, Tara, makes this fabulous caramel for the apples and dips them in white chocolate and sprinkles them with cinnamon. They are to die for!!! I made them last year and they were delicious! This year I decided to mix them up a little. I used her same caramel recipe and dipped them in the caramel, then milk chocolate, and then rolled them in broken up Heath bars. Oh, man!!! Good stuff! Thankfully I had lots of family around to help me eat them so I don't weigh 500 lbs.

It's been so long...so very long....

Brian finally hooked up our computer and internet so I can finally get fully back into my favorite activity in the world...BLOGGING!!!! I can put pictures on again and everything! HOORAY! (Can't get any to post right now of course but I'll try again later) Now if I can just remember to keep the battery charged so I can take pictures we'll be in business. I didn't get any pictures of my kids together on Halloween. I have a few random ones on my cell phone that weren't from Halloween day and I didn't get a single picture of my oldest in his super cool Dead Slasher Rocker Dude costume. And noone got a picture of me in my vampiress costume. Oh well. We had fun anyway! Friday night we went to a "trunker treat" at Brian's brother's church building that had 2 wards at the party and our Max won the "cutest costume" award!! So fun! I have to say he was quite cute! Our family is back to health. Gracie's congestion has improved quite a bit and she was back to sleeping through the night again last night which was SO nice! Brian still coughs occasionally and Max too but for the most part they are back to normal! Thanks for all the prayers! I know they helped!!! After a crazy 2 weeks of very little sleep for mom who was up medicating everyone, sucking out noses with nose suckers, feeding bottles, and worrying..a lot I was quite exhausted!!! Brian agreed to get up with Gracie Friday night so I could have a decent nights sleep and it was WONDERFUL!!! I have to admit I have had it pretty easy in the getting up with babies department. Brian fed Zack his nighttime bottles....every 2 hours...until he was 14 months old! AND he worked construction! He also fed Matthew his nightly bottles but luckily he stopped needing one after about 5 months and Brian was in school and didn't work a physically tasking job like construction anymore. With Max we took turns every other night for months and then I opted out of that whole thing and he took over every night. He told me that with Gracie I was on my own. He was DONE!!! Lucky for me she has slept through the night since like her third night home except for the occasional need for a bottle and this last week her stuffy nose woke her up a lot and she needed bottles then but other than that I sleep. Let me explain myself a little and then you can fairly judge me and I won't mind a bit what your judgement is!!! With Zack I had post partum depression, which I didn't understand but I did know that if I didn't have sleep I couldn't deal very well and if I had sleep I could be patient and kind and loving and things were good. No sleep, no patience, lots of crying for me and feeling inadequate and like a horrible person in every way and a horrible mom after pleading with the Lord for a baby for 6 years. All I know is I was much happier because Brian fed bottles and let me sleep and I will be eternally grateful to him for that!!! With Matty and Max I just couldn't go back to sleep once I was up and I was in school too with Matthew and unlike Brian who could study during the day I had to study until like midnight every night because I still had to do EVERYTHING else that was required to run the house and take care of the kids. Brian on the other hand can feed a bottle and fall immediately back to sleep. I would be up for HOURS just laying there thinking of all the millions of things I needed to do the next day. No matter how tired I was I couldn't fall back to sleep. Same now! These last 2 weeks I slept MAYBE 3 hours a night if I was lucky because I just couldn't fall back to sleep after giving medicine and feeding bottles and stuff. I know I'm a whiner and so pathetic but isn't my husband THE BEST HUSBAND EVER for doing that!!! And I have to say the kids all ADORE him and I like to think that some of their closeness comes from those "bonding times" when he fed them at night! ;)

Does anyone know which movie I got that quote from that I used for the opening title of this post? I just love movie trivia!

THE meanest mom that EVER lived on the face of the WHOLE earth......

That would be me!!! Max (age 3) thinks so. For many, many, reasons. Some of these reasons: I won't let him carry drinks all over the house and spill them everywhere. When I let him pick what he wants for lunch or breakfast (I let them pick if I'm in the mood for that since they HAVE to eat whatever I put in front of them at dinner time and usually they want something different than what I want and Matthew is allergic to some things that Max can eat) and then he sees something someone else has and thinks that looks better I won't make that for him too and that is very, very mean!!! I won't let him run all over WalMart like a crazy boy. I make him pick up stuff he knocks off of the shelves. I used to stock shelves at Albertson's and I find that to be very annoying and so rude!!! I make him wash his hands with sanitizer when he touches every inch of the counter and bench in the pharmacy every time we ever go in that area. Germaphobe mommy doesn't go for that!!! I won't let him throw balls in the house. I could go on and on. Well, his latest reason for thinking I'm the meanest mom is that I make him get dressed. Yes, I know. I make you want to call DCFS right?! He would go naked all day every day of the year if I would let him. I let him get by with wearing less during the summer for sure because it's warm and stuff but when it's winter I just can't take it! Last winter he wanted to wear shorts every single day. With snow boots of course. And a short sleeve shirt but NO COAT!!! I fought with him every single time we left the house about wearing his coat! UGHH!!! I NEVER let him wear the shorts and boots out of the house but he wore them constantly at home. This year I packed up all of his shorts to save the fight. Well, now he refuses to get dressed at all. If I can convince him to wear clothes it isn't very long before he starts his slow strip. Each time I see him he has one less item of clothing on until he's right back to nothing but underwear...if we're lucky!! I've been really trying to put my foot down the past few days because hello, THE KID HAS SWINE FLU!!!! I keep telling him he's never going to get better if his body can't stay warm because he's running around naked all the time. He even took a super long nap the other day because I told him to get clothes on or go to bed and he chose the latter and fell asleep for like 3 hours. Maybe I should just go with it and have naptime back in my life! That would be AWESOME!!! Anyhoo, we fought for like 10 minutes this morning while I forced clothes on him and told him that he gets a time out if he takes them off. He's probably buck naked already. He has refused to wear his coat to this point but it's stinking cold out today and I'm sure it's just going to stay that way from this point on until June! So, I'm bracing myself for the argument we'll have the next time he leaves the house. I'm just glad my kids ride the bus and Matty isn't in 4 days a week preschool this year. We absolutely without a doubt left the house at least 4 times a day last year not including errands. At least there won't be quite so many arguments!!! OY VEY!!!!

Swine flu update: Zack has been back to school this week. Matthew went to school today for the first time. Some Dr.s say they are fine to go back to school 24 hours after their fever stops but others say they should stay home for 1 week after first symptoms start. Well, I'm a little concerned about his asthma in this cold since it's already flared up but he's there and hopefully ok. Max is doing a bit better. He ran a fever all the way through yesterday but so far so good today. The wierd thing with this flu is they'll not have a fever for like 10 hours straight and then it's back. It lingers forever! Gracie is still really stuffy and has a runny nose but didn't have a fever during the night. Hopefully it's not back today. I'm so worried about RSV so hopefully she gets all better quick and doesn't have anymore problems. Brian has it too and is still really achy. It kind of turns into a cold at the end with a yucky nose and cough I've noticed with all of them. The fever seems to take about 4 to 6 days to really run it's course and finally leave for good so hopefully Gracie will be fine by Friday.

Sweet Baby Gracie

Gracie has a fever now too so I'm sure she has swine flu. I'm scared because she's so tiny and she's never been sick before and I just hope its mild like Max and Zack's have been!! Please pray for her because I'm a big chicken and I know that prayer is the very BEST medicine she could ever have!!

I discovered her fever at 3:00 a.m. and so far she has been ok. The ibuprofen and Tylenol have been keeping control of it. I hope it stays that way! With Zack, Matty, and Max their fevers were low grade and controllable the first day. Zack's and Max's stayed that way but Matty's spiked on day 2. The worst day seems to be day 2 or 3 for everyone whether the fever gets higher or not they just feel horrible!! So if the fever doesn't spike tomorrow or Tuesday I think she'll be ok. Brian is sick too. He thought he just had a cold and went to the football game an hour and a half away yesterday and was running a fever and feeling really bad by the time he got home. At least he had fun, huh?! I just hope he didn't spread it to anyone. It's hard to know at first if it's the flu or a cold if you are having a more mild version of it. Matty has been doing so well! I am so happy! He finished one of his steroids today and still takes Albuterol and Pulmacort. From what I understand he should be out of the "danger zone" by about Wednesday. Zack is totally back to normal with a very mild cough hanging on but otherwise good. Max is really good. His fever is only at around 99 degrees and he seems to be feeling a lot better. I'm so glad that they had the mild version of it! Such a relief! On the bright side...if you get it once you never get it again, or so they say, so we can hope that's true and we don't have to deal with "swine flu" again!!!!

We took him off of the Tamiflu. We're just praying he does ok without it!!! He had his last dose at dinner last night. Then we saw the news where we found out about Tamiflu. Other than acting INCREDIBLY strangely when he got his dose of albuterol this morning he's been fine so far. Apparently Tamiflu has strange reactions to interactions with other medication so once its out of his system we think he'll be fine! I just hope he doesn't get viral pneumonia!!! My 3 year old has the flu now but so far its more mild like our oldest sons bout with it. Baby and I are the only ones who haven't had it. I hope she doesn't get it! Too scary!!!

We've been giving our son Tamiflu and he's having crazy side effects which we now have learned are very common if you take this. Hallucinations, hives, they can have seizures, neurological stuff, and even death. I'm freaking out because he's having some of these. They say not everyone should even use this stuff. Just the ones with asthma and heart disease. I'm not sure he should even with the asthma. Scary!

Swine Flu + Asthma = 1 very sick little boy!!!

My 9 year old Huey came down with a low grade fever and a cough last Saturday. I wondered if it was the swine flu but then it was so mild I was not worried and thought it might just be a little cold or other virus. We just kept the fever down and he was fine. We know several people that have had it and they all had varied reactions and intensity to their flu. My little Dewey and I have asthma so I have been quite concerned each time I hear that someone has died from H1N1 because of other underlying conditions they had when they got the flu. Each time they have said what that condition was it was ASTHMA!!! One of the first people that died was near my age and had asthma and had just recently had a baby. Well, that describes me and has worried me. I do not want to leave Brian with 4 kids to raise alone and I'm certain he doesn't want me to! I have been especially worried about my little Dewey! When I heard the other day that the reason people with asthma have been dieing is because they contract VIRAL pneumonia I became quite concerned! Well, I don't like the idea of the vaccine because I feel it was too rushed and they don't know long term effects of it and stuff but I decided it was important for me and Dewey to be immunized since we have asthma. We went down there Monday and got our shots. Tuesday night he started having a low grade fever and coughing. Wednesday his fever was 102.3 and his cough was worse. During the night I was alternating Tylenol and Ibuprofen every 3 hours and it still wasn't controlling the fever. He was really wheezing and his breathing sounded terrible! I kept giving him puffs of my inhaler since we are out of medicine for his nebulizer and he didn't really have asthma problems much in the last 2 1/2 years. Well, I took him to the very weird but super nice and very concerned dr. in our new town. She gave him a breathing treatment with no improvement so she prescribed pulmicort, liquid albuterol, prednazone, and Tamaflu. Apparently they have found that if people with H1N1 start using Tamaflu in the first 48 hours of symptoms their reactions aren't nearly as bad as if they don't use it. He has been doing so much better! He isn't pale as a ghost! He stayed in bed yesterday and barely ate anything but today he has been up and playing, eating, fighting with his brothers and just doing really well. He obviously isn't 100 % and has a ways to go before he is over it completely but he is breathing and that is a VERY, VERY, GOOD THING!!! We are so grateful for the prayers of our family! We hope he continues to deal well with it! I just thought I would share so that if any of you or your children have asthma you know to seek help immediately if you think you might have the flu! It takes 4 weeks for the immunization to take effect so even if you have had the shot or mist you still aren't completely out of the woods for 4 weeks! She said that she thinks that the fact that he had the shot on Monday will help him not have as severe a reaction as if he didn't have it. Also, the main reason people die is they wait too long to seek treatment! We found out that 8 of the kids from Huey's class were also home sick on Monday. And the teacher was absent, not sure if he's sick or what. Anyway, I hope none of you or your children get it but if you do please be careful!!!

Dumbfounded!

My 3 year old "Louie" is such a handful!!! I couldn't begin to tell you all of the crazy things he has done in his little life! With his brothers Huey and Dewey I could tell what they were thinking just by looking at their faces. I could see what their next move was going to be and stop them before they could get into too much trouble. Most of the time anyway. Well, Louie is like nothing I've ever seen before in my entire life!!! Since we have lived with my mother in law since September 26th he has been at the top of his game! I am afraid she is going to get so tired of his destruction she'll kick us out! He broke a glass door on her book case that she has had for years and years, thankfully not cutting himself but gee thanks we could not have possibly thought of a better way to spend money than to pay to have this door fixed! He has clogged toilets, written on her garage floor with sidewalk chalk, written on her kitchen floor (that is now just concrete since the linoleum is now gone as they are prepping the floor for tile) with a black sharpie. He broke a plate one day. He put stuffed animals and metal lids in Dewey's fish tank he got for his birthday and killed all the fish. He started to poop in the backyard but was caught too soon THANK GOODNESS!!! I could go on and on and on!!! Well, tonight after dinner we were all in the family room visiting and watching t.v. when I heard an unidentifiable noise and asked Brian to investigate since I was feeding Buttercup a bottle and he was just "innocently"going to the bathroom. Not 5 minutes later it was discovered that he had removed one of the hinges off of a door frame with a screw driver (the one just above his eye level). YES!!! HE'S 3!!! WHAT......THE........CRAP!!! And people wonder why I'm CRAZY!!! I have to try to think like HE DOES all...day....long..............in vain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Brian's mom jokingly asked if we have ever considered a cage. Then she said of course he'd probably just take all the hinges off and escape anyway! At least he makes us laugh too!!!

MOTHER BEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Once upon a time...I used to eat nuts all the time! I LOVE them!!! Reece's Peanut Butter Cups, peanut butter cookies, SCOTCHEROOS, Nutrageous, Snickers, m&m's, PEANUT m&m's, cashews, chicken pasta salad with a whole can of cashews thrown in and tastes so stinking good it isn't even funny, peanut butter and honey sandwiches, p.b.&j sandwiches (either of these on regular bread or toasted...YUM!), those cute little peanut butter cookies with the Hershey Kisses in the middle, I could go on and on and on!!! I LOVE nuts!!! My second son used to LOVE m&m's! One time when he had just turned one year old I decided to give him a Reece's Pieces and it LITERALLY flew out of his mouth across the room! I looked at him strangely and slowly put another into his mouth and it FLEW across the room, too! It was as if someone scooped their hand into his mouth and flung it out with their finger tips. It was a little freaky so I decided, ok, no Reece's Pieces for you! One day a few weeks later I gave him a peanut butter sandwich. He wouldn't eat it but only played with it. I was trying to shove a piece of it in his little mouth because sometimes if they just taste something they like it but his teeth were clenched like you wouldn't believe so I just gave in and decided to give him something else. After a few minutes I noticed that his whole body was covered in hives. I called the Dr.'s office because I immediately wondered if he was having an allergic reaction to the peanut butter. They said since he wasn't having a problem breathing to just stop by some time and have his blood tested for nut allergies. Brian gave him a bath and the hives went away. We should have also given him Benedryl but didn't know. Anyway, they tested him and sure enough he is allergic to peanuts. They said ONLY peanuts but not other nuts. Several months later Brian gave him a pistachio when I was picking up our oldest son from kindergarten. When I drove up he came running out to the car with my almost 2 year old baby in his arms covered in hives and doing this weird clearing his throat thing like my sister Stephanie does when she has an itchy throat and ears from allergies. We rushed him to the E.R. which thankfully was only like a mile from our house. They immediately rushed us back to a room. Only me and my baby because there could only be one other family member with him. The Dr. came in immediately and told me they would give him the epi pen and at least one other shot and a breathing treatment right away. I sat in that little room watching my rambuncious little perfectly healthy boy go from having a little problem to writhing around on the bed with a panicked look on his face as his throat swelled more and more closed. He was grabbing for me, sitting on my lap, going back to the bed, writhing around some more, grabbing for me again saying, mama and looking like 'aren't you going to help me?' It seemed like an ETERNITY before the nurse came in. When he started to be LETHARGIC I ran out and said HE NEEDS HIS SHOT!!! She ambled in and took her time getting his shot stuff ready and giving it to him chatting away as if I was there for a yearly flu shot or something. I was absolutely TERRIFIED!!! He had to have a medication for a week after. They said if we missed even a dose of it his reaction would be much much worse than the original reaction. It seemed like hours between the time he ate the nut to the time he got the shot, but it was only about 15 minutes. I thank my Heavenly Father every day that he was ok then and beg him to help us keep him safe every day! I firmly believe he has a little guardian angel that shot those Reece's Pieces across the room a few weeks earlier! We took him to an allergy specialist that did the scratch test and said that he is allergic to all nuts except almonds. Try finding almonds that aren't cooked in peanut oil or with other tree nuts. He's not allergic to the peanut oil it's the protein in them but I don't trust that peanut oils are refined enough. Apparently he is REALLY, REALLY allergic to cashews as well. The welt from the scratch test was huge and lasted for 3 days with him taking Zertec for it for the entire 3 days. The Dr. said, "don't EVER let this child have a cashew!!!" about 10 times while we were there so we're really careful about cashews too! Think of a peanut. Think of how yummy and salty and delicious they are! Now think of when a little peanut breaks in half and there is that little tiny piece of peanut right between the two halves at the end of it. Now imagine that if your baby had even that much of a peanut his throat would swell shut and he would die unless he is around someone at the time that knows he is allergic to peanuts and can give him an epi pen shot and rush him to the E.R. Ok now imagine that now he's 6 years old and in all day kindergarten and eating at school now. Every day the "other option" for picky kids is an Uncrustable PB&J sandwich. I talked with the lunch room lady and his teacher and they decided that every day he would sit on the end of a table and the lunch room teacher assigned for his class would make sure that no one ever sits by him that has a PB&J sandwich. Now imagine that 6 days this month they are serving peanut butter and honey cups with their rolls at lunch. I decided on those days I'll send home lunch for him so I can make sure there isn't any cross contamination or anything. I don't take chances! Not worth his life! Now imagine a lovely little student sitting next to him waves his peanut butter and honey cup in your sons face TRYING to hurt him KNOWING he is deathly allergic to peanut butter. What do you do about that?! Some mean kid was trying to hurt my sweet, little, quiet, shy, son!!! Thank goodness his lunch room teacher saw and put a stop to it and punished him when they got to class. The MOTHER BEAR is awake!!!!!! LOOK OUT!!! I didn't find this out from my son. I found this out from a concerned parent of another sweet little child that was so freaked out by that kid doing that that he talked to his mother about it. The only reason they have the peanut butter and honey cups is that the nutritionist for the school district has decided she can justify putting mac-n-cheese on the menu if she throws a little protein in the mix. She also believes that ketchup is a vegetable!!!! What the crap?! Anyhoo, they don't offer a peanut free table or anything. I am so freaked out! Now, I have heard so many people over the last 5 years act like it is such an inconvenience for them that my son is allergic to nuts. They act like it's just me saying please don't let my kid have mustard because it might stain his shirt or something. Now I know you have tons of stuff planned with mustard but don't let my kid anywhere near it because I don't like dealing with stains. It's not just some fluff thing it's literally LIFE OR DEATH!!! How would you feel if it was your kid?! Is a peanut or having peanut butter honey cups worth a child's life? I mean really!!! I know a boy that if he is in the same car or room with someone who opens a peanut candy bar he automatically starts going into anaphylactic shock. Putting that nut cup in his face could have killed him! My son has to either eat it or touch it to have a problem. I am just so freaked out! I don't know what to do! When he was 18 months old and started going to nursery at church the teacher told me maybe I shouldn't bring him because she didn't want that kind of responsibility and she liked making pb&j sandwiches for snack time and bringing Reece's Peanut Butter Cups for snacks. I for one thought it was more important for him to be there learning about Jesus than that the other kids get a freaking sandwich!!! So did the Primary President, thankfully! It was decided that I would make a very very long list of all the many things he CAN eat and they would stick to that list! Hello....ever heard of Goldfish crackers?! Since then I have read many articles and watched many news programs on the subject. I know that people who like their kids to eat peanut butter are just as adamant (for some weird reason) about their kids getting to eat peanut butter as I am about my kid NOT eating it! If that is the ONLY thing your kid will eat...you've got some REAL problems!!!! I have NEVER expected people to stop having nuts in their lives all together because of my son! I only say that at family functions I would appreciate it if people would just tell me if the dessert they make has it in it so I can keep him away from it. I did think it was wierd that less than a week after I sent the family letter out telling everyone about his allergy when he was almost 2 asking everyone just to let me know if nuts were in something they make, that at a family function there was a very, very large fruit bowl full of peanuts in the shell on the counter for everyone to eat. SCARY!!! Just leave a loaded gun on the coffee table why don't you?! I also find it weird when people bring peanut candy for all the kids to eat and touch my kid with peanut covered hands knowing it could kill him but I don't say a word, not one single word. I just try to warn him as best I can and pray a LOT!!! His teacher asked if the classroom needs to be peanut free since they use a lot of candy for counting and stuff? I said not necessarily. I said he can eat quite a lot of candy. I offered to bring a bag of different kinds of candy for him to have when the other kids have peanut candies. I bought skittles for him to use for counting when they use m&m's, etc. I am not a jerk about it I didn't expect her to buy it even. I am his parent. It is my responsibility to make sure he is safe and I obviously need her help and knowledge when he is at school but I try to not make it a huge pain in the butt since I know some mothers are jerks about it. I do, however, love my child with all of my heart and soul!!! What would you do and how would you feel if you had watched your son almost die in your arms from an exposure to nuts and you knew that it only takes 15 minutes for your son's throat to swell shut and like 20 minutes for him to take his last breath? It's not just a little annoyance....it's my son's LIFE!!! It feels like I'm letting him run and play in a busy street and crossing my fingers that no one speeds down the road and runs over him or something. It's just so scary to have to trust that total strangers will keep your son safe. If I didn't think I'd lose my mind I'd consider home school........
Needed to vent all of the thoughts and feelings I am having right now! Thanks for listening!!!

It's Just WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, so, I'm old! I get it! I accept it! I just don't know what to do with this knowledge. I don't know what is age appropriate to wear. Or what is age appropriate for my hair. I still feel like I'm 19 on the inside. I'm 36 now and I see adorable stuff at the stores and I think oh that is SO cute!!! But am I too old for it?! I mean, I know I'm not 80 or anything but I'm just confused! I need a style. I need to be more hip and cool in a 36 year-old kind of way. I don't want people to think I'm like a total loser in my outfit that looks like a 19 year old has more business wearing it than I do. I also don't want people thinking, nice outfit, grandma!! I was at Target a few weeks ago and I was wearing a (what I thought was) cute t-shirt I bought a few months back at Old Navy. It was one of their $5 tees. Well, I'm feeling cutish in my little t-shirt when an 85 year old lady comes walking by with a grin from ear to ear, wearing MY shirt! I didn't know whether she was wrong or I was wrong or if we were both right. I just know that it felt terribly, terribly, WRONG!!! I miss my friend Melissa! She used to live next door to me. We lived in townhouse apartments and our doors were literally like a few inches from each other. She is adorable! She is also a hair stylist. I was always knocking on her door asking her if this was cute or that was cute or if I looked freaky! I ask Brian now and it just isn't the same. He'll tell me I look cute and then I see myself in a picture and I'm completely mortified!!! I don't know if he really thinks it's cute, doesn't have the heart to tell me I look like a freak a deak, or what but it's just not the same, that's for sure! I've been keeping my eyes peeled for a cute shirt lately and I have seen a few that I think are great but I don't have the confidence to just buy it. Maybe I should just get a new pair of shoes! I LOVE shoes!!! You can't really go too wrong with shoes and a new pair of shoes always makes me feel better!!!

More rambling...

~I have noticed that a lot of people in our new little town have the Kate from John and Kate Plus 8 haircut. They vary in length and color and such but basically the same haircut. Some of the people look SO cute. Others look SO weird! And still others must have cut their own hair and look very, very BAD!!! Many of them look like boys I must say. I've decided that that particular haircut, like all haircuts, looks really good on some people and not so good on others. Halle Berry can pull off a haircut that is basically bald but most of us just can't, you know. My mom's hair is similar to the "Kate" cut and she looks so cute and always fixes it so cute and is pretty so she can pull it off really well. Others, however, are just not so lucky.
~It is sometimes really, really hard for me to focus at church on what the people are speaking about when I have my referee hat on trying to keep my 3 boys from killing each other right there in the middle of church. It is even harder to focus on what they are saying when I notice little things about people like the fact that the chickadee in front of me today had OBVIOUSLY colored her own hair since it looked like she was a calico cat. Also, there was a man there that I graduated high school with that all the girls thought was really cute and he is like pretty big now (so am I, I know!!! I'm just sayin) and has a lot of gray hair now and he looks really old. Older than Brian. That is OLD! hehehe I know I'm probably going to H...E...double hockey sticks for not paying better attention to what I should be but it's really hard for me sometimes. Do you think I have A.D.D.?
~I love living in a small town again! Here are some of the reasons why...Brian comes home for lunch every day. -It only takes like 5 minutes to get anywhere in town.- I can drive to WalMart, shop at WalMart, and drive home from WalMart in the time it used to take me just to drive to and from WalMart. -I almost always see someone I know when I go to a store here. -I filled my tank up a week ago Saturday and I still have half a tank. Doin a dance!!! LOVE it so much!!! Hated having to fill the car up at least once or twice a week!-I get to shop online again. Not that I couldn't before it's just that I didn't do it so much when I lived up there. I love, love, love, getting boxes in the mail!!!! -I don't feel so bad when I have to run an errand and I don't look like I just stepped out of a magazine. Not that people look like crap here or anything (well not everyone anyway) they just look realistic. You know. I swear where I lived before people were always wearing 4 inch heals to the store and stuff. -Brian, his mom, and I went to lunch with our son at his school as a belated birthday lunch during Brian's lunch break the other day. I used to have to drive an hour each way if I wanted to have lunch with Brian where we lived before. So nice! -When I think I'm running late I'm still usually at least 5 minutes early because I keep forgetting it only takes 5 minutes to get anywhere. -Give me a few weeks and I'll probably have a "Things I hate about living in a small town" list but for now I'm enjoying it!
~Halloween is the coolest! I just love it! I love the decorations, the candy, the treats, the scary movies, the scary music, and the fun the kids have with dressing up!
~I don't know what this "lick my lollipop" thing is on facebook but it creeps me out! Especially when someone sends this request to my HUSBAND!!!! Not cool!!!!!!!!!! DELETED....IMMEDIATELY from friends list!!!!!!!
~I'm pretty boring these days can you tell?! Just me. Taking care of the kids. Doin' laundry. Washing millions of bottles. Changing millions of diapers. Running errands. Cooking. Cleaning. And thinking I really should get out more. And I don't mean to WalMart! OOOPS! I forgot...that's all there is here...WalMart...that will probably be at the top of the "things I hate about living in a small town" list!!!!

My husband won't stop touching me!!!!!

Not in a good way, either! Let me explain...when Brian and I got married we slept in his king size bed that his mom handed down to him several years after her husband had passed away and she decided to downgrade to a queen size bed. I was all into snuggling when we were first married and he was all into his own space. He would snuggle me for a few minutes and then he'd be like that's enough. Have you ever seen the episode of Friends where they were trying to figure out how to unsnuggle once the girlfriend fell asleep? At least they were nice about it. :) Well, I just still snuggled with my stuffed animal I used to sleep with before we were married and it was all good. Yes! I still slept with a stuffed animal. It was one of those huge bears from Penney's and was so soft and snugly. Anyhoo, a couple of years ago he went through a snuggling phase and sometimes I really enjoyed it! Other times I was thinking...seriously...get away...I can't sleep with you touching me!!!!!! But after being married that long I was trying to be grateful he still liked me at all and didn't say anything...just suffered in silence. ;) We had our oldest son sleep with us until he was 2 and once we got our bed back I swore I would NEVER do that again!!! And we haven't! Just the occasional sick kid in the bed or snuggle time with the baby after a night time feeding where the umbilical cord doesn't seem to stretch all the way back to the bassinet that was pushed up against the side of our bed, once in a while. We moved in with Brian's mom until we can find somewhere to live down here and we live in her basement that has a large family room, 3 bedrooms, and large entry type thing, and a bathroom. Louie has his own room so his brothers can actually fall asleep at a decent hour without him bugging them for hours after bed time. We took the room with a queen size bed and room for the crib and Brian's beloved television. We put the other boys in the room that has 2 queen size beds in it so they could each have their own bed and there is still plenty of room for dressers and stuff. How do people sleep in queen size beds?!?! I can't sprawl out! I even know of people who share a double bed. NOT ON YOUR LIFE!!!!!! We'd probably kill each other! I steal the covers all night. Which isn't any different than when we sleep in our king size bed other than the blankets are smaller so there is less chance he'll have anything left to cover up with at all. We keep touching each other in a totally Nacho Libre kind of way..."a nice pile drive to the face, or a punch to the face." Not on purpose of course but after 16 years of having plenty of space to sleep you have a hard time remembering when you are sound asleep that there is someone RIGHT THERE and you elbow each other, kick each other, and basically get on each other's nerves A LOT!!! Well, I'm thinking of trading the boys! Just think of all the space we'd have to ourselves if we each slept in our own queen size bed?! It would be heavenly. It's not too far to go if we need a little "private time" (cousin Eddie, Christmas Vacation) then you just go right back to all that glorious space!!! Hey, if it was good enough for Rob and Laura on the Dick Van Dyke show, by gosh, it's good enough for us! Right?!

Where did all the letters go?

I remember when I was a little girl my grandma lived two states away and when I was being baptized she sent me a sweet little letter about the importance of baptism and expressed her love to me. I was on cloud 9! I remember getting birthday cards in the mail from my grandmas and that made me feel so special! I became pen pals with one of my favorite cousins, John, who also lived two states away and that was so much fun! His family even sent me a really cute shirt in the mail that said someone in their town loved me and I wore that thing until it fell apart! I also remember when we moved two states away from my hometown right before my junior year of high school that lots of my friends and family became pen pals and that really helped me through a very difficult time! I wrote to friends and family who served missions. I wrote to my grandmas. I totally got into decorating the envelopes really cute and I was really into stickers and would stick them all over the place too. Now my kids think a card in the mail from grandma is pure gold! The other day my mother-in-law received a letter from my nephew, her grandson, Jordan who is serving a mission. She was THRILLED!!! She read and reread his letter. He is quite a character and joked in it and she laughed and read it to us and we laughed and then she folded up the letter and sat it down and patted it and said how nice it is to be getting letters again like she used to get from her sons when they served missions. At that moment I suddenly became really sad! I thought of all the lonely grandmothers out there that don't have email or don't know how to text on a cell phone. I thought of the movie The Mailbox that my mom used to show us to motivate us (guilt us) to be better about thinking of our sweet little grandmas. I remembered how wonderful it is to receive a HANDWRITTEN letter from someone you love. Now the only time we get anything like that in the mail is at Christmas and a lot of people have stopped sending Christmas cards out. It's kind of sad I think! Today I'm going to write Jordan and I'm going to have my boys write to him too or draw a picture. I know it gets hard when you are a missionary or you are a military person or you are facing anything in your life that you need a little support and encouragement to help you along. And I also know that getting a letter from someone gives you a much needed boost and puts a big ol' smile on your face that stays there for a long time! I can't wait to get my first letter from him! It will be so fun to have an actual letter again! There's nothing like it! :)

Getting my "fix"!!!

~AAAAAHHHH....I feel better now! I'm finally at a computer for the first time since Friday. I'm a total addict so this has been kind of rough for me. Thank goodness for my free Blackberry I got when I renewed my contract with T-mobile or I would have been totally lost! I know...I need help!!!
~The kids went to their new school for the first time yesterday and I was so worried about them. I was worried they wouldn't make friends and would hate me forever. I was worried about Dewey since he has been attending half day kindergarten and this school has all day kindergarten and I was worried about how that was going to work out for him. I was worried because he's deathly allergic to nuts and is eating at school for the first time ever, where they have a peanut butter and jelly uncrustable as their alternate option EVERY SINGLE DAY! I talked with the lunch lady and his teacher and since they don't have a peanut free table like some schools do they are putting him at the end of the table in the same seat every day and the kindergarten lunch aide will make sure no one is sitting next to him who is eating peanut butter sandwiches(even if he gets touched by someone who has peanut butter on them he will AT LEAST break out in hives and if he accidentally ingests it his throat will swell shut and he will stop breathing and die unless they give him the epi pen I left in the office. Little frightening for this mommy!) THEY DID AWESOME!!!!!! Such a relief!!! I went to high school with and was friends with Huey's teacher. HOORAY!! He's a super nice guy and best of all.....HE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN HOMEWORK!!!!!! BONUS!!!!!!! He only makes them do homework if they don't finish their work in class. LOVE IT!!! Huey also has his cousin in his class so that makes him feel much better! He already has a built in friend, someone to talk to, play with at recess, someone to make him feel comfortable and like he's not all alone in a brand new school in the 4th grade. Thank heavens for his cousin!!!!! Dewey had a super great, fun day and was so happy............until last night when he was laying in bed and decided he misses me too much when he's at school. How sweet is that?! This morning was really tough! Dewey thinks it is cruel and unusual punishment when I wake him up at 6:30 a.m.! His other school started at 9 a.m. and was 2 minutes away so he could sleep in until 8 but at this school he has to catch the bus at 7:35. This morning they rode the school bus to school for the first time EVER...SUPER BONUS!!!!!!!!! The bus driver is one of his other cousins' grandpa Randy. Also great because I know they know the bus driver and I know he's nice. WHEW!!! I feel so much better now!!!! (I lived across the street from my elementary school and never moved until high school so I am new to this whole bus thing and I am totally sure that I was the only one nervous about the bus! The boys were so stoked to ride it and Brian always rode the bus so he thinks I am a weirdo but whats new?!
~Buttercup is SO DREAMY!!!!! She has always slept at least 7-11 hours every night since she was born except for an occasional night where she'll need one or two feedings. I've worried about her adjusting to a new place and we decided to put her in her crib in our room instead of the bassinet so with the move and the different bed I was a little worried it would freak her out a little and screw up the perfect thing we had going. She is doing so well!!! She took a nap yesterday in her crib, she's still sleeping through the night, she is really happy and content (most of the time anyway, she is still a baby after all), she's like her brother Dewey and is a super easy eater (Huey had to have soy and ate every 2 hours round the clock for 14 months, Louie had reflux and projectile vomited up his formula all over the place all the time and was skinny and I worried about him all the time!!!) and I just LOVE her so much!!!!! She is the best little girl and has the sweetest, most adorable smile ever! I just can't get enough of her! She lights up when she sees me and thinks I'm pretty great and I am equally as smitten with her! She is such a joy! I feel with her like I did with my second child. Just relaxed, able to really thoroughly enjoy almost every moment, happy, confident as a mother. Easy babies are so great because you're not constantly worried and feeling guilt and inadequacy all the time even if you shouldn't feel that way. It's just been great! We all adore her and are having so much fun watching her every little accomplishment. This weekend while cleaning the house we moved out of she actually was on the floor long enough to not only roll to her tummy like always but also back over to her back again! HOORAY!! Such a cutie! She doesn't get a lot of floor time because Louie can't leave her alone on the floor and I'm afraid he'll love her to death! :) Anyhoo, it's going really well, and we are glad to have the move over and adjustments started. I just need to organize all of our stuff here and get Dewey to be happy about all day kindergarten and things will be even better! I hope you all have a great day!!!!

Randomness.....

~I HAD to share the cuteness of my toes! My mom knows I LOVE it when this lady Meg paints my toes so she got me an appointment so I could have cute toes! So fun! Meg is amazing and start to finish it only takes like 10-15 minutes. I especially love the little red gems she put on each big toenail. So fun! I'll have to keep wearing flip flops until November so I can look at my cute toes!

~As we left Meg's house yesterday we saw a grasshopper. Louie said,"It's on the street so it's called a streethopper!" Cute

~I have learned something very important at church lately and I may be going to a very HOT place for this one but I simply can't help myself, so, here goes.....if you are an old lady and you don't like the size or shape of your lips, DON'T paint a new lip on your face that goes like half an inch above your actual lip! You aint foolin' no one, honey!!! If you're going for pretty lips-don't do it! However, if you're going for entertainment value-knock yourself right on out there toots! By the way, laughing.hysterically.quietly. in the middle of Sunday School is NOT easy!!! Bad, I know!

~I was packing up the toy room yesterday and the boys were playing "sQuat team"! Cracked me up!!

~I missed Bonnie Hunt this summer! I have caught a little of her show a couple of times while feeding Buttercup the last 2 weeks and I always have a good laugh! She's hilarious and I look forward to being moved so I can actually maybe sit down for full episodes once in a while.

~Louie kicked Dewey in the face. I asked him to come here. And he yells,"but I did it on accididn't."

~I LOVE this time of year! I love the cool, crisp air. The feel of fall. Looking at the beautiful colors of leaves on the trees as they change color before leaving the trees bare for the winter. I always crave apple pie and soup during the fall. The temperature is just perfect! It's just AWESOME!!! The last few years it has felt like it went straight from hot summer to cold winter without much of a fall so I'm totally LOVING it this year!!!

~Dewey is deathly allergic to peanuts so we are always telling the kids not to share drinks and food and to not kiss him if they've eaten peanuts. Louie had some peanut treats last night and Dewey wanted to hug him and Dewey said," but mom I had peanuts last night!" I said well, "that's ok, you can still hug him you don't have to kiss him." He says, "but they are still in my tummy." I guess he was afraid to touch him with his tummy because of the peanuts. Such a sweetie!

To do list:

~Find more boxes.......check! (Thanks Payless Shoes!!)
~Take Louie to his dentist appointment.......check!
~Find a house to rent.....................................found one next door to the loopy guy that lives on Airport Road with the GIGANTIC aluminum can collection that is as deep as his tall back yard fence........does he hide dead people under there or what?! ............................................find a storage shed to rent to store all of our crap in and live with Brian's mom until we can find a DECENT place to live........check!
~Take Dewey and Louie to have dental surgery Thursday!!............check!(Dewey couldn't breathe very well when he was coming off of the anesthesia so they finally gave him some morphine to calm him down so they could give him a breathing treatment. I'm glad he ended up being fine after giving me and my mom a total heart attack!!! Louie did great!!! Thank heavens!!!)
~Find someone to take Huey to school on the morning of his brothers' dental surgeries.........................check! (Thanks Uncle Chris!!!)
~Plan an "Under the Sea" themed birthday party for Dewey for Saturday and pull it off without too many hitches...............check!
~Take a trip to the party store and a billion trips to WalMart in the last 2 weeks because you are too frazzled to "get it together" and keep thinking of more crap you can't live without!!..............check!!!
~Bawl your eyes out 2 Sundays in a row all through church because people keep being so darn nice and making you really, really want to stay there.............check!
~Go through the toy room and pick out stuff to give away..................check! ( This is not fun for me to do. For some reason it is really hard for me and causes me much anxiety and I usually end up only giving away some kids meal toys and keeping everything else but I ended up giving 4 garbage bags full of toys away. YAY ME!!!! I still have one of those awesome tool benches, and a great kitchen, and some little Mickey Mouse storage bin shelf things and some other things that I'm also going to give away. The kids love them and I'm kind of sad to see them go but they are just TOOOOO big!!! I am so HAPPY to give the light bright away!!! No more light bright pegs all over the house in crazy nooks and crannies, HOORAY!!!!!)
~Wash ooodles and oooodles of laundry and dishes when not packing or feeding Buttercup.............check!
~Fold and put away the Mount Everest size mountain of laundry that was washed and heaped in my bedroom all week.................check! (Ok, don't judge me too hard on this one. I was lucky to wash it this week with everything I had going on there was NO way I could get it put away until last night. It WAS easy to pack it up after folding it last night though since almost all of the clothes we own were all in one room:) ! )
~Show the house 3 times to potential buyers and 2 times to potential renters in the last 2 weeks......................check! (This I will NOT miss when we move!! And being serenaded by cows at 6 a.m. ....well, maybe a little. JK! And band practice at the high school next to our subdivision at 7a.m. on Friday mornings....even in the summer!! ARGH!!)
~Finish packing up everything and clean the entire house by Saturday which is moving day, write a talk on baptism for my nieces baptism that is on the same day we move, call the school where we are moving to, change utilities out of our name, make Dewey's ACTUAL birthday on Thursday special and fun, don't lose it completely...............I'll have to get back to you on this one!!!!

I LOVE TO READ!!!

I really, really love to read! I love reading the kids their fun little books, especially if they let me pick them, and I love to get a chance to just take a whole day and lose myself in a good book. Let the dishes and laundry pile up, let the kids do whatever they want to as long as they just let me read in peace, stay in my p.j.'s, snuggle up with a blanket, and just read, read, read!!! AHHHhhhh.... My love of reading began when I was just a little girl and my mom would read books to us while she watched Days of Our Lives. She was so talented at multi tasking, don't you think! One of my favorite years of reading was my 4th grade year. That's the year I discovered Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret, Where the Sidewalk Ends, Superfudge, Ramona books especially Ramona Quimby, Age 8....They were so great and I just couldn't get enough of them! There were a few years that I really didn't care about reading in the least bit during high school when they expected us to read lame books that I couldn't care less about but about a year after Brian and I were married I started reading The Work and the Glory series. 9 books! Huge books, too! LOVED them!!! I couldn't put them down. All of my chores in the house would pile up, I would force myself to eat occasionally and pee once in a great while (oh the bladder of a body that hasn't had 4 babies), I would stay awake all hours of the night. Sleep? Who needs sleep?! I'm READING!!! Ever since then I can't read enough books! I always have a library card in every city we have lived in. I've discovered some amazingly talented writers and have even read some classics. LOVED Anne of Green Gables when I read it 2 years ago. Such a wonderful book! My mom still feeds my love of reading by lending me the books she buys after she reads them! I've had a book on my nightstand ever since the week Buttercup came home from the hospital (3 1/2 months) and I am determined to finish it if it kills me! Great book but right now every time I pick it up it puts me to sleep. Morning..noon..night...doesn't matter, I sleep...I know some day I'll be able to start really reading again so I'm not too worried. I was SO excited when my 4th grader told me today that his teacher read Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing to his class last week. He has been a great reader and can't put a good book down once he starts reading it. I hope he always loves reading! I started thinking back on all my favorites. Such great memories! "Reading is the magic key to take you where you want to be."

Love this:

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says~~"Oh Crap, She's up!"

Just a little ventilation...

So, am I the only one that thinks it's weird when old men sit outside on their porches in their pj's watching kids walk to school? I just saw a guy doing this the other morning when I took the kids to school and there was a guy that did this in another town we lived in when our oldest was in kindergarten. I find it very creepy and disturbing!!!

You all know we're moving and I'm trying to get a free minute somewhere to pack. I was trying to be all productive the other morning but couldn't stand my kitchen floor that was sticky from the boys making fruit kabobs to go with our dinner the night before and apparently dripped juice everywhere so I decided to mop. I mopped my kitchen, then the pantry, then 2 bathrooms. I was walking back into the kitchen to dump out my water since I needed to scrub out the sink in there anyway and forgot that the floor would be slippery and slipped and fell and landed on my left knee and dropped the mop bucket full of water all over the floor. I'm so talented! I'm sure my husband is sorry he missed that spectacle! Anyhoo, last night I had my oldest son peeling potatoes for me for our dinner and I walked by him and caught my right pinkie toe on his heel and it bent back and I'm pretty sure it broke. It's all purple and swollen and lovely. That's just what I need...to be slower than I already am! FYI somehow he wasn't hurt.

This morning we were listening to the radio while we waited for my kindergartner to get out of school. The song Hero by Enrique Iglesias came on. When he belts out, "I will stay by you forever." my 3 year old says,"I will step on you forever????" like he was wondering what the heck!! Cracked me up!

I LOVE that lately my 3 year old has decided that when I'm in the same room as he is he'd better tell me to look away before he does something naughty! Thanks for the heads up, buddy! Now if I could get him to give me some sort of signal before he wreaks havoc when I'm NOT in the room my life would be SO much easier!!!

We've lived in this house for 6 months that is for sale and we have only had a hand full of people come to look at it in all of that time...until....we've decided to move, we're trying to pack up the house, my husband started a job over an hour away and was staying in that town overnight last week and I didn't have help, we have a ton of stuff going on and the house looks like a bomb went off...THEN we have people come to look at the house. It has shown 3 times in a week. Including this morning. At 10 a.m.! I keep having to frantically speed clean in just a few hours time (don't know what happened to the agreement that we'd have 24 hours notice but whatever) to try not to embarrass myself or the realtor that is also our landlord too much when he shows the house. THAT is something I will NOT be missing about this house when we move! OH! Or the really, really light tan carpet throughout the house! 3 boys + almost white carpet= yuckarama carpet!!! Especially under the table! GROSS!! Should be outlawed!!! We finally bought a great carpet remnant to put under the table so my poor husband didn't have to keep shampooing all the time.

That is all for my venting today. Thanks for listening and have a great day!!! :)

I love my job AND the people I work with!

I've been packing our stuff for our move. I'm pretty much a pro at this since this is our 15th move. I always pack the stuff we use least often first. I packed up my first 6 boxes before it occurred to me that I had just packed up all of my scrapbooking stuff, card making stuff, jewelry making stuff, and all of the books I want to read. It made me kind of sad for a minute that those were the things that are used the least at my house and then I remembered that all too soon I will have time to do all of those things because my hands won't be so busy with cooking and laundry and dishes and bottles and snuggling my baby and that will be kind of sad so I am feeling better about all of my fun hobbies collecting dust for a while. Pretty soon I will be able to find more time to do stuff like that a little here and a little there and that will do for now. In Feb. 2008 I was in such a funk as far as my feelings about my choice to be a stay at home mom and would tell my husband I loved the people I worked with but I HATED my job!!! I was feeling so overwhelmed and freaked out by the monotony of my life. All I did was clean and you could never tell I had done a thing because my boys would just go behind me and mess everything up as fast as I cleaned it up and I was totally losing it! I scrapbooked and made cards and watched my Gilmore Girls boxed set for a couple of weeks and pretty much ignored the house (which I paid for later) so I could feel like I was actually doing something I loved and I could feel more like I wasn't just a useless maid but still got to do stuff for me!!! Well, I am so happy to say that a year and a half later I am thrilled with my job AND I love the people I work with now!!! I love taking care of my children's needs and taking care of the house. I am still really frustrated by the kids destroying everything I accomplish but that's just part of it isn't it?! I discovered blogging shortly after that time in my life and it has really helped me a lot! As the kids get older those things get a little better and this too shall pass, which is good AND bad. I really want to savor every second of my kids lives! I have watched my little nieces and nephews grow up from little babies to be missionaries, spouses, and parents and I can't believe how quickly that time has passed. I don't want to look back on this time ever and wish I would have taken the time to enjoy the moments that are only here for a little while. In the past I often found myself living in the future. I would say well when this happens, then I'll be happy. When we have that then I'll be happy. Now I can say I am trying to be happy every day and to find joy in my life every day, which isn't very hard when I'm surrounded by these adorable children of mine that I love so much, that rely on me and depend on me and love me. I feel blessed most days and of course overwhelmed often but mostly blessed! I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for entrusting me with these little angel babies to raise and teach and love. I never wanted anything more out of life than that!

I want a WIFE!

My friend Tara put this on her blog and I just thought it was too good not to share and she was nice enough to not mind me copying her! I think we ALL can relate to this!!!


I want a WIFE!
By Judy Brady Syfers (1971)
I belong to that classification of people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally, I am a mother. Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent divorce. He had one child, who is, of course, with his ex-wife. He is looking for another wife. As I thought about him while I was ironing one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that I too, would like to have a wife.Why do I want a wife?I would like to go back to school so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and if need be, support those dependent upon me. I want a wife who will work and send me to school. And while I am going to school I want a wife to take care of my children. I want a wife a wife to keep track of the children's doctor and dentist appointments. And to keep track of mine, too. I want a wife to make sure my children eat properly and are kept clean. I want a wife who will wash the children's clothes and keep them mended. I want a wife who is a good nurturing attendant to my children, who arranges for their schooling, makes sure that they have an adequate social life with their peers, takes them to the park, the zoo, etc. I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick, a wife who arranges to be around when the children need special care, because, of course, I cannot miss classes at school. My wife must arrange to lose time at work and not lose the job. It may mean a small cut in my wife's income from time to time, but I guess I can tolerate that. Needless to say, my wife will arrange and pay for the care of the children while my wife is working.I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me. I want a wife who will keep my clothes clean, ironed, mended, replaced when need be, and who will see to it that my personal things are kept in their proper place so that I can find what I need the minute I need it. I want a wife who cooks the meals, a wife who is a good cook. I want a wife who will plan the menus, do the necessary grocery shopping, prepare the meals,serve them pleasantly, and then do the cleaning up while I do my studying. I want a wife who will care for me when I am sick and sympathize with my pain and loss of time from school. I want a wife to go along when our family takes a vacation so that someone can continue care for me and my when I need a rest and change of scene. I want a wife who will not bother me with rambling complaints about a wife's duties. But I want a wife who will listen to me when I feel the need to explain a rather difficult point I have come across in my course of studies. And I want a wife who will type my papers for me when I have written them.I want a wife who will take care of the details of my social life. When my wife and I are invited out by my friends, I want a wife who take care of the baby-sitting arrangements. When I meet people at school that I like and want to entertain, I want a wife who will have the house clean, will prepare a special meal, serve it to me and my friends, and not interrupt when I talk about things that interest me and my friends. I want a wife who will have arranged that the children are fed and ready for bed before my guests arrive so that the children do not bother us. I want a wife who takes care of the needs of my quests so that they feel comfortable, who makes sure that they have an ashtray, that they are passed the hors d'oeuvres, that they are offered a second helping of the food, that their wine glasses are replenished when necessary, that their coffee is served to them as they like it. And I want a wife who knows that sometimes I need a night out by myself.I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied. And, of course, I want a wife who will not demand sexual attention when I am not in the mood for it. I want a wife who assumes the complete responsibility for birth control, because I do not want more children. I want a wife who will remain sexually faithful to me so that I do not have to clutter up my intellectual life with jealousies. And I want a wife who understandsthat my sexual needs may entail more than strict adherence to monogamy. I must, after all, be able to relate to people as fully as possible.If, by chance, I find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to replace my present wife with another one. Naturally, I will expect a fresh, new life; my wife will take the children and be solely responsible for them so that I am left free.When I am through with school and have a job, I want my wife to quit working and remain at home so that my wife can more fully and completely take care of a wife's duties.Who wouldn't want a wife?

What a cutie!

So my 3 year old son walked up to me with a book yesterday and said,"Mom, I haven't met this book before, will you read it to me?" I just thought it was adorable!

Don't EVER take your eyes off of Louie!!!!

This is the side of our couch. Louie likes to draw on everything in our house except paper. I started to scrub it and then decided to take a picture of it so that's why there is a darker spot. That kid!!!!!


Huey thought it would be fun to make a 2 layer cake. He did such a great job! He just loves cooking and has even made some cakes from scratch. Well, we turned our backs on Louie for 2 minutes and this is what happened to the cake. Crazy kid!!!

Wishing For Something More....

I'm having one of those days when I'm looking at my wardrobe, my hairdo, my furniture, my accessories all over the house, my towels, my computer table, my kitchen table I painted red 4 years ago, my car and basically every purchase I ever made and wondering WHAT WAS I THINKING and wishing I could win the lottery and go on a super fun shopping spree and replace it all.......sigh!!! Maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and just be happy I have all that stuff in the first place instead of wishing it was better. Let's hope!!! It's much better living a happy, grateful life instead of wishing for things I can't have. Ok, now I feel guilty!!! I AM grateful for everything, there is just a part of me that still wishes for better. Is that so bad?

We're moving......again! That makes 15 times in 16 years. *&%$#?@+!!!!

Brian got a job!!! YAHOO!!! He said,"You don't seem very excited about it." I said, "I'm really excited about it it's just that now the work begins for me!" Packing. Cleaning. Changing addresses. Finding a place to live. Changing the kids schools. Finding a preschool for Louie. Changing Dr.s, dentists. You know all that fun stuff. All while taking care of 4 kids by myself morning, noon, and night. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Getting the kids ready for school. BEDTIME :{ All.....alone.....while Brian stays with his mom until we can all move down. He'll come home one night in the middle of the week and on the weekends but I am such a wimp! I haven't had to consistently do this alone since adding our 4th bambino and I'm really, nervous but I'm sure it will all work out I just hope I can get every thing done. The very, very worst part of moving of course is the most dreadful thing of all!!! Finding a new hairstylist since Emily doesn't live there anymore!!! I've had to go to the hair schools for the last few years because the budget wouldn't allow anything else. I would pray desperately before each appointment and things turned out amazingly well other than it taking 4 1/2 hours for a cut and highlights. Brian colored my hair the last time it was done. SCARY I know but he did a surprisingly good job. But I'm sure that he is just as excited for me to have someone else do it next time as I am! Now if I could just find a place to do the boys and Brian's cuts every month that wouldn't set us back $48 bucks so I wouldn't have to do that anymore! They might have to go to the beauty school now. No, scratch that, NO ONE has that much time on their hands!!!

How can I tell?

Well, school is officially back in session. How can I tell? My floor is covered in wood chips again! Gotta love it! :)

Hannah Montana Rocks!! :)

Yes, it's true, I like Hannah Montana! Ok, so I'm 36 years old and maybe that seems weird but you know, I just don't care! I started out watching the show with my kids, I always watch at least one episode of a new show with my kids before I let them or banish them from watching it whichever the case may be. It is really a cute little show! I think the writing and the actors abilities have evolved over the life of the show and at this point it is really quite entertaining. I feel like it works for all ages. I've even caught it after the kids are already in bed and I'm flipping through the channels and I watch it without them because I think it's THAT cute. There aren't very many shows on regular television anymore that we can watch as a family. The sitcoms or reruns of sitcoms are all pretty risque for our little ones so it's been fun to find a show that the whole family can enjoy. It is pretty funny too! I always have a good chuckle during it. The kids LOVE her brother, Jackson. He's really pretty funny! Well, I wanted to see the movie but I couldn't get Huey to go to it with me because he's a closet Hannah Montana fan as well apparently since he's a boy and it's about a girl and he's just not ready to let the world in on his little secret. Well, I rented it and watched it and I thought it was really, really, good! It even made me cry a little at the end. (Not such a hard thing to do these days with my hormones still trying to even out after having my baby in May. But still.) I just love that song she sings at the end called The Climb. It is SO good! It's made me get choked up every time I've ever heard it because it is so sweet and is a great inspirational song for kids and grown ups alike I think. Now, please don't misunderstand me. I am not particularly a big Miley Cyrus fan. She does some weird things and I'm afraid she's headed down the same path as Britney Spears and the like but I really like the character she plays on the show Hannah Montana. Anyhoo, my confession is over. Don't judge, just love! :)