Seriously?!

I like to at least give the illusion that I have it all together but my family just keeps revealing how very much I don't have it together at all and it is so not nice.  :(   So yesterday I was at BYC for like ever and when I got home it was time to leave the house to head to church. Matthew was wearing a cowboy boot and a dress shoe. When I asked him what the heck was up with that he told me that he and Brian had searched high and low and hadn't been able to find either of the matches to his crazy little pair of shoes. Greaaaaat! So I did a quick search and couldn't find a match either. Now, some of you have actually seen their room and you are not surprised in the least but they had their room totally clean on Friday. I bribed them with a trip to the $1 store and they whipped that room into shape in no time. This fact made me even more upset about the shoe thing. The matches are probably hidden in abyss at the bottom of the toybox, never to be seen again.So he went to church with 2 different shoes on and even had to give a talk in Primary (which, by the way, went surprisingly well considering I forgot he had to give a talk in Primary until the last speaker in Sacrament Meeting was speaking, so I had to just throw something together), where he had to walk to the front of the room where EvErYoNe got to see his unmatched shoes. Oh, and by the way, I just LOVE what obnoxious kids say to other kids. (yes I know mine are probably obnoxious too and I'm just blinded by motherly love to see it) Last week he couldn't find the other church shoe and wore his cowboy boots and some obnoxious kid made fun of him for wearing cowboy boots to church. Ummm there are parts of Emery County, Salem, Kansas and, I'm sure a zillion other places, where cowboy boots ARE their only church shoes and that's totally cool.

Anyhoo...



So, just when I'm getting over the embarrassment of yesterday's shoe dabockle, Max is ready to walk out the door to wait for the bus, when I look at his feet and realize he has on 2 different sized snowboots. One being his size, and one being 4 sizes bigger. Seriously!?! Does he not see a problem here? Really? (big ol' sigh)  So I frantically looked for a matching snow boot and Brian found the match and told him to put them on. The bus had already showed up and Zack was doing an outstanding job of stalling in hopes that Max would get out in time. Well, Max ran out of the house with one boot on and one boot off. Thank goodness Brian had shoveled snow so he wasn't running through that. So I close the door, and I'm still furious over this crazy situation and Brian tells me that Max didn't take both of the matching boots. He took one of those and the 4 sizes too big boot. So I furiously drove over to the school, in my pajamas and my hat that protects my trigeminal nerve from getting cold and causing me pain, but makes me look like the 3rd clone of the dude on the movie, Multiplicity, you know the copy of a copy one, that is always saying, "Hi, Thteve!" and tried to shave his tongue but they had taken out the blade on the razor. So, I get to the school in all of my glory and Max and Matthew just happened to be the only kids on the playground, seeing as how it's only 20 degrees out and all and they are clearly crazy. So I have Max switch boots but he couldn't get the one on his foot so he still has the 2 unmatched boots on. I told him that if anyone says anything to him about his crazy boots then he is to tell them that his mom didn't want him to wear them like that but he snuck out with them on, so people don't think I'm such a loser mom. If this illusion I'm trying to give is eVeR going to work then I'm going to have to have my kids on board. I mean really, they're totally cramping my style.