Delusions of a Super Mom

I used to have chore charts for the kids. I just had them do a few chores like making their beds, cleaning toys, setting the table. Easy stuff. When we first moved to Price I never started that up again, having faith that we'd be moving any day and we'd start it in our new place. Then, when we moved here life was crazy! My health was steadily declining and I just didn't do it. Now that the medication I'm on helps with some of my symptoms I have been able to start doing more deep cleaning, organizing and just plain trying to make more sense out of life. Some days are really hard and I just can't do much so I have to play catch up for the next couple days and when I change medicine I have harder days but when it kind of evens out and I actually feel pretty decent I really dig in! I can't do EVERYTHING! I know that! Ever since my diagnoses in November I guess I have felt more like it's ok to start asking Brian and the kids to do more to help out. I have so much guilt over that usually because I have that whole complex about being a stay at home mom and feeling like because I do that I have to be super mom and super wife and get it all done and not ask for help because that's how I "earn my keep". Brian NEVER has made me feel that way I just feel that way!!! I think a lot of it is the stereotype of a stay at home mom sitting around eating bonbons or something you know. I am ALWAYS busy! There is ALWAYS something to be done. I WISH I could just sit around and eat bonbons all day. I have to force myself to take breaks because my body needs breaks and even still I have that guilt. Brian keeps encouraging me to scrapbook and sew and stuff but I just have a hard time giving myself permission to do those things. Well, I've started asking Brian and the boys to do more to help and it's been wonderful! I still have plenty to do but it really helps to have them do more. I really shied away from the usual chore chart because I have my kids help me all the time and I hated to put more on them than they already were doing not that they were over worked or anything. I was just feeling that stupid supermom complex crap that made me think I should be able to do it all and what the heck is wrong with me that I can't! My kids are always putting dishes away in lower cabinets, getting things out of lower cabinets, picking stuff up off the floor and handing it to me, getting the clothes out of the dryer for me when it hurts too much to do that, getting stuff out of bottom drawers for me, just basically being at my beck and call all day to help me perform tasks that have become impossible or at least extremely painful for me to do on my own. We had them take care of the dog most of the time and we have them do quite a lot of stuff outside as well. Well, even with the extra help I finally decided we need more organization in our lives. I knew I needed to do a chore chart again so that things were more organized and so that the kids were helping more and learning to clean and such, I just didn't know where to begin. After talking with Brian, my Mom, my friend Sherelle, and reading some chore chart stuff online I decided what I need is a flexible chore chart. There are some things that are just expected, everyday things that MUST be done every day by each of them. Like brushing teeth, making beds, doing homework, straightening bedrooms. It's the blank spots on the chart that are my favorite parts!!! Every day I get to write chores down that I need done specifically for that day. One day I needed the dining room vacuumed, the table cleared off, and the toys cleaned up around the house. Every day is different for each of them and they (mostly Matthew) grumble a lot but I keep assuring them that it will be good for them to learn to be hard workers. And it has been great to teach them about working together as a team/family to get things done and how there are 6 of us and I am only one woman and it's just impossible for me to take care of everything for 6 people. It's hard getting used to all of this again after having a break for the past 2 years from chore charts but all in all I think it is going ok. Today, I taught Zack to clean the bathroom. Many of you will be appalled that I am just now teaching my 10 year old to clean a bathroom. I know. It was that supermom thing, and the fear of bleached out clothing, etc. that held me back. I have to say that it was one of the funniest things I have ever experienced in my entire life!!! He was literally gagging when he was cleaning the toilet and the floor around the toilet. It was hilarious! He's quite the little comedian and had me in stitches the entire time as he over exaggerated his disgust at having to do this chore!!! I haven't laughed that hard in I don't know how long! He laughed too and it was actually a fun experience. Next weekend it's Matthew's turn to learn to clean the bathroom. I have a feeling it might not be so enjoyable...Wish me luck!!!